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  1. #1
    Idiotic is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default I like a Crazy Girl...

    Hey Guys,


    I was hoping to get some advice on what to say when me and my gf break up so she will want me back before too long. We have known each other for over a year as we worked together, she wasn't single when we met but became single shortly after and has since had a secret attraction towards me that I didn't find out about until I was about to leave the place of work and move to another job. But basically we started seeing each other on weekends outside of work and spending time together.

    Everything was going great, so great that she got sick of waiting and asked me to be her boyfriend. But after about a month together her interest has started to drift a bit, I suspect this is due to me overplaying the nice boyfriend role a bit too long despite that not even being who I was.

    A little about us:
    I am a 25 y/o male with;
    -a decent job
    -decent career prospects
    -University education
    -Good Body
    -Good looks
    -Shorter than the average standing at 5'7" or 5'8"
    -Sound mental health

    She is a 20 y/o female
    -Very attractive looks and body
    -Very Intelligent
    -5'4" or 5'5"
    -Nice/Caring
    -Daddy Issues
    -Model
    -Professional Fire Dancer
    -Severe Depression/social anxiety/Fibromyalgia
    -Constant back/stomach pain
    -Took a year off work due to depression
    -Very low self esteem


    So yeah, I am nothing special and neither is she really when you weigh up her baggage against her looks. But for some weird reason I really like this girl. However, the last two weeks have been rocky with her and her depression (I suspect) but last weekend she came out and said that she wasn't sure if we were compatible long-term and that the spark wasn't there.

    Now I can't help but feel that if I had not treated her nicely and treated her like a piece of meat (like all her ex boyfriends) then she would have stayed very interested and into me. Since she has daddy issues, mental problems, and low self esteem she wants/expects to be treated like just a piece of arm candy. Now I can do that but I thought I would have a better chance with her if I differentiated myself from the rest of the guys she has been with and actually treat her nicely. I am the first guy that her parents haven't dissaproved of haha.


    But basically my question is this, as I know the breakup is coming and I want to meet her over it. How can I play this to make her think she may have made a mistake and want me back before too long.

    I have been thinking of playing it something like this;
    -Accept the breakup and let her know I think its a good idea (she will probably not expect that)
    -Tell her I couldn't relax and be myself due to her non communicating and how she acts when upset. (Relating to long-term issue and spark)
    -Tell her I am not usually that nice, and that I am more of a jerk. (Relating to long-term issue and spark)
    -Thank her for the great times and all the help she gave me and that I enjoyed it all (make her think back towards the weeks when she was really into me)

    I basically am trying to play the whole 'girls want what they cant have' card. If she isn't sure that I am going to be there for her then she may think twice about breaking up.

    All of her ex boyfriends have cheated on her and not really cared for her too much, I suspect that once they get to know her they all don't think of her as wife/long-term material so they just keep her on the side for a while. So with that being said I feel the chance of her thinking of me at a later date can be quite good as I obviously haven't cheated on her or treated her badly.

  2. #2
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I like a Crazy Girl...

    Lol you put 'sound mental health' while giving your girl 'very low self-esteem....

    She sounds bored. Create some drama and freeze her out for a day or two. Make her pout a little only to parch it up. Realistically her saying what she said means she's getting bored. In a relationship the worst thing you can do is be boring. Soooo create and escalate the situations to fill her with emotions the good and the bad. By bad i mean teasing / breaking rapport.

    You're going to hit the wall hard if you're waiting for her to do something. The ball is in your court. You have to pay attention and start ramping up the emotional escalation ladder so she gets that taste of excitement she's lacking.

    If your game gets boring she would love to see you get in trouble for her so she knows you're still alive in the relationship. This is why a lot of people tend to fall out of the honeymoon phase rather hard. Lets face it, you got lazy in your game. Create some drama. I suggest a simple Freeze Out over small nothings and turn up the heat to escalate things to her emotional radar...
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  3. #3
    Idiotic is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I like a Crazy Girl...

    Isn't it a bit late for a Freeze Out considering we are pretty much broken up now. We just haven't had the official break up talk yet. That's the part where I want to actually get it into her head to hope that she missed me and comes back before too long.

  4. #4
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I like a Crazy Girl...

    Do you live with her? If so make it an obvious Freeze Out.

    I dont this is too late to freeze her out because freeze outs are meant to get the girl interested into you again wondering why you went cold. You'd have to work it very carefully so not to push her back too far. Think of freeze outs as a tool to get the girl talking again.

    If she doesnt live with you your best bet would be to just start doing things to spark her interest. If shes cooking tease her with physical escalation so she chases you until you are ready for sex. Thats just one example of how to bring back some spice. Its not a one trick pony so you really have to work at being more attractive than usual. I dont think pre selection would help you much as interacting with her more seems more intimate.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  5. #5
    Idiotic is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I like a Crazy Girl...

    No we don't live together, and she isn't a big texter (as she is always keeping herself busy due to depression etc...)

    But yesterday she did send me this:

    Her: So neither of us has made an effort to talk to one another which makes the relationship kind of pointless... do you agree?

    Me: Yeah well you didn't exactly want to talk to me last weekend either, so I just thought id leave ya to it. Are you going to be in the city today, id rather do this in person (meaning the breakup chat)

    Her: No I wont be free until this evening, like I said its a two-way thing, you haven't made an effort either.

    Me: Really??? exactly... two way street. You didn't make an effort either.

    Her: Isn't that what I just said...?

    Me: Yeah

    END OF CONVERSATION - I didn't meet up with her and haven't bothered messaging her back.

    Basically the week before she told me that she wants sure if we are compatible long term and that there wasn't any spark. Then later she proceeded to sulk on my bed (due to emotions and back pain) so I took her home. And we hadn't talked since until I got that message yesterday.

    Should I pre-emptive break up with her, or what?

  6. #6
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I like a Crazy Girl...

    You dont have to break it up if you dont want to. Right now you can lead. Stop looking to blame her or yourself. The past is the past. Keep your eyes on the prize--and the prize is the girl... Only question left to answer is if its this girl...?


    If you want the relationship then make the effort and if she reciprocates then keep escalating. She wants to know what its like to be wanted by her partner. She wants passion my friend.

    The reason why i sat this is because she hasn't left the blame all on you. She said shes to blame too. The most important thing of why she's hinting at you is so you know this is it.. Take it or leave it.

    I keep hinting at this because of her emotional patterns. She's looking for a guy to help swing her emotions for the best. She's emotional centered--so she isn't going to like a dull boring relationship. She needs spark and drama because she uses her feelings as fuel to function. Logic wont help unless you're using priorities based on emotional logic which is opposite to social based logic which is how most men function.

    So what do you want? Decide before you go in there to talk. Hold your frame and take charge with what you want to happen. Use her emotional output / reactions to your benefit your active reading skills for IOIs or IODs so you can ninja the situation.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.


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