Hey guys , new to this forum. I am Anton, almost 24 living in South Africa, finishing my degree and then start honours in Sports Management. Any advice is welcome negative or positive , just need to know what you guys think about it.
To start I dated this girl for almost 4 years. Had a great relationship and told many times to each other that we want to be together the rest of our lives. She is a very emotional girl and we where on the same page about everything. She is finishing her honours this year and turns 23 in November.
Bad part is from my side, last year I started a job as a dj and got carried away, cheated on her , failed my year in varsity and disappointed my friends and parents. Got back on to my both feet and wanted to do things right in life as I see the path I was walking was completely wrong.
Told my Ex girlfriend I cheated on her and she broke up with me ( just wanted to be honest and do the right thing ). It is been 2 months now , we have been saying each other still and it didn't seem we where broken up. Now after a month I started realising we couldn't do this anymore so I slightly cut of contact for me and her to sort out our own life and get our priorities straight. I apologised so many times cause I do know what I have done was completely wrong. I worked on myself in meanwhile and now we still having contact but way less ( she phoned me yesterday crying saying she is said and worried about everything , tried to comfort her but with no emotions involved from my side ) she needs time to get a clear view on the situation.
Obviously I love her and I know she still loves me, now I don't want to get used as she led me on the past 2 months, and in meanwhile she is been seeing other boys and doing all the possible stuff not to think about me. I think she just had her breakdown where everything becomes reality.
Now 2 weeks ago she said she didn't have her period and first hpt was negative but second hpt showed 2 lines. Now we both stressing and worried. We going to see a doctor next week.
Now I do feel bad and I take responsibility for my actions, I told myself I do anything to work on myself as I do see I was wrong and where I was wrong. I really genuinely regret it.
Any advice on this situation , I am holding up strong , accepting we broken up but I do still want her back , not out of guilt but cause I really really love her.
Thanks a lot