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  1. #1
    rayfinkle is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default still want ex ??

    So dated a girl for a year we broke up when she started to hang out with this guy from work a little more than I was comfortable with. So we break up I date hook up so on but still miss her. Well turns out she starts dating her friend from work.

    Anyway he and I are supposed to be in a wedding together well I try and talk to the guy to clear the air but he avoids me like the plague well finally the groom tells me go to his house talk to him. So I go over he avoids again calls me on the phone lies about dating her tells me I am abusive and a stalker. I tell him are relationship wasn't perfect but I wasn't abusive. Well she calls tells me she hates me and never talk to her.

    Well we don't talk but I'd text her here and there. Well 3 months later I get a phone call her dad had a stroke I talk to her give her a pep talk tell her everything is going to be ok. Well we go get drinks one day I ended up taking her home I try to make a move but she shuts me down. Well I keep with the texts.

    So I have a birthday party for my room mate I invite her and her friends they come over have a great time but don't spend the night. She texts me the next day and says we can't talk anymore. I keep texting.

    So a month or so goes by and she calls me again very late crying. She says she sorry she called and won't do it again but 2 weeks later the same thing happens. So I go get drinks with her again. We talk here and there but I keep texting.

    So we go out the day before Thanksgiving and some guy grabs her ass I beat the guy up she ends up spending the night in my bed but no sex (she said she felt violated and she just wanted to sleep beside me I think I should have been more aggressive here).

    So she ends up going out of town with the guy from work she had been dating. I text her I'm sick of being the guy she runs to when things are shitty in her life but when there good she doesn't want me around.

    So a day or so after Christmas I go out for drinks and see her and her man. Well she comes over says hello. I say high and proceed to drink. Well her guy comes over and asks to shake my hand. I tell him to leave me alone and don't talk to me or I'm going to beat him up. He sits down. Well she keeps coming over and talking to me finally she sits down and I buy her a drink I tell her she seems happy, she gives me a death stare. The whole time the boyfriend stands there. So they go to leave she says good bye we hug. Well he's leaving and says "hey merry Christmas" so I go after him body slam him on a table throw him into the bar. Well the fight gets broke up. She calls my buddy he explains the situation. She texts me the next day and says don't ever talk to me again I simply say ok.

    I realize throwing the kid around was the wrong thing to do as far as getting her back. But everyone that was there said I wasn't out of line and the kid was being a jerk not that it matters but is what it is I guess.

    I see them out 2 or 3 times and every time they see me they leave. So I send her a message that I don't care and they don't have to run away every time they see me in fact she could say hello. The second time it was bad the guy made the bar owner open an emergency door to not have to walk by me.

    Well I see them on St. Patrick's day and they get into a tiff. She sees me and mouths "please go" and gives me a desperate face. I wink at her and leave. Turns out that he didn't want to stay at the bar when he saw me but she did because all her friends were out according to her friend.

    It's been a long time and I doubt there is any hope but I wonder if there's anyway to fix this. We haven't talked since the fight.

  2. #2
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: still want ex ??

    Yea fighting, while it feels good in the moment, has those consequences and it seems like you're going through it. I think you had a chance before the fight and now it seems they are paranoid around you. Tough to seduce a woman when she's too busy being worried you're going to fight her bf again.

    It may sound cheesy and you're inclined to disagree, but I think you need to clear the air with this one between you and him. It's the only way she will be comfortable around you again. It's the only way she will start calling you and crying again. Which is something you could work with if she does that. But there's this HUGE wall now because of the fight, I think. You're option may be to suck it up and make friends with him. Keep you're enemies close remember. Hope this helps and good luck.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  3. #3
    rayfinkle is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: still want ex ??

    You don't think she'll call as soon as something goes wrong?

    I appreciate the advice think I can text her or something?

    I basically used the text your ex back program before and it was semi successful but I think I wasn't as aggressive as I needed to be when we were alone and didn't close her.


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