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  1. #1
    Marine1300 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default 2 years after breakup: any hope

    Well I never thought I'd be posting my story, by the same token I never thought I would find myself single at age 34. My past was pretty typical. I was in a 5 year relationship, leading to marriage and ending in divorce when she had a serious affair while I was deployed with the military. Heartbreaking yes. Did I get over it...yes. After that, my confidence was shot for a while, had a couple relationships, less than 6 months each and ended by me. Than I met her. She blew me away. Most beautiful girl I've ever seen. Maybe that's the real trap of life, she meant something to me before we even got together and I could tell she was exactly what I was looking for (at this point in life I know what I want). We were together for a year and a half, and my god it was good. She had just recently gotten out of a 6 year relationship where she was cheated on, but she said she was really done w him when he did that. Unlike rebounds, we took our time in the beginning. Anyway, everything was great. She used to say i was the perfect boyfriend. Not to float my own boat, but she used to say she could barely comprehend how or why I was with her, that she actually felt I was out of her league at times. I'm not that great, but I have a really good job, I'm in good shape, i own a house, good education (all things that dont matter at all really, but still) and I know how to treat a woman. Her father was in the marine corps, as was her uncle, and I think she had this secret attraction to military guys, though I'm the only one she ever dated. Her family absolutely loved me, they were praying we would get married. She had a bit of a troubled past, low self esteem, and always struggled w open communication. But when she would open up, her feeling for me were intense. She didn't like to showcase our relationship, not clingy. But really, I felt like I had finally found my partner for life and I was truelly in love. Sex life was out of this world. Best partner ever. She is a type 1 diabetic, and didn't take very good care of herself while we were together. I didn't get on her much about it, though she knew I desperately wanted her to be healthy because I cared. After being hospitalized for diabetic kiatosis a couple of times, she finally bit the bullet and went on the insulin pump. A life savor, maybe. But according to her, it made her sick and miserable for months as her body adjusted to proper insulin levels. 2 weeks after she got the pump, I got the call. That call that we all dread. She said she just couldn't be in a relationship while going through this, that it was just too much. That she could barely get out of bed from the sickness and couldn't manage a relationship at thesame time. She said in what I think was total honesty "look you know how much I care about you, you know that without a shadow of a doubt. I don't not want you in my life, I don't not want to see you, but I need you to understand I can't do this and it has nothing to do w us." Well off all the breakup lines, that was the tuffest. I believe she was being honest. I know all the signs when a relationship is going bad. There were none, this was the biggest shock of my life. I respected her decision and secretly hoped one day she would be back in my arms. That was 2 years ago. She is not the type of girl who has it in her to contact me and say she misses me. We had a long period of silence, occasional Facebook likes and an occasional text. I had mostly assumed I would never see her again. Then, 2 months ago, she starts liking my Facebook stuff a lot, out of the blue. I had previously told her I had been dating, she told me she had finally started seeing someone but taking it slow. Then, not 1 week after she starts on Facebook, I saw her at a party ( her uncle is one of my best friends from my.military days, that's how I met her to begin with). She was very very flirty. The entire night, she was either hanging all over me, or striking up conversation about things we used to do. She asked me to leave with her and I strangely said no. I didn't want to reward her ignoring me for almost 2 years w sex, and I know that's what she wanted. Afterwords, I got the cold shoulder again. Dunno if she felt rejected, since I did reject her, or if she just feels nothing towards me. Worst part is I always knew if she was to try to get back, that's how it would happen. Seeing each other randomly, she doesn't communicate her feelings via text, or phone, I literally called the events of that night a mile away knowing her as I do. I sent her a note saying that seeing her made me realize how much I missed her in my life. She would never respond to something like that, as expected, no response. Now I find myself missing her like crazy and wishing to hell I had acted different that night a few weeks ago when I saw her. I'm wondering, could she still care for me after all this time? We almost never fought when we were together. I literally never thought we would break up. Is there any chance that maybe there's some hope for us? I'm not hanging onto that hope, starting to date again. But god I would do just about anything to have her in my life again. Like a drug, this girl made me feel so amazing, and since our breakup was so externally driven (if her story was true, I think it was, at least mostly) , could she miss me too? She still had pics of us on her fb, as do I. I'm the only guy she has pics of, and she is def not the type of girl to keep things like that when she wants nothing to do w the guy. Any thoughts? I'd normally dismiss this and say "move on dumb*as, but I feel like I lost the most amazing women ever, and I do feel like she never forgot me, though that's just one of those gut feelings.

  2. #2
    redstar1324 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor Achievements:
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    Default Re: 2 years after breakup: any hope

    I have one of these stories except we only were "together" for a month and she was the daughter of a billionaire and set to inherit something like $20 million when she turns 21.... I can see how it was my fault and why she didn't like me, so I bettered myself and want to go back new, but I can't for legal reasons...

    Have you ever asked yourself why she cheated on you? Have you changed/improved anything about yourself (or A LOT) since then?

  3. #3
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    HollywoodCA is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: 2 years after breakup: any hope

    I hear ya. I dated a celebrity and as soon as I relaxed and stopped being Alpha and was needy, she dumped me. Couldn't get her back no matter what I tried. As in the movie Swingers, the only way she'd possibly come back is if you are truly over her and don't care anymore. Better to go out, work on your game and find someone even better. Trust me, she's out there.


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