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  1. #1
    callmemister's Avatar
    callmemister is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Lightbulb could use some help!

    here's the situation

    im no pro, but i could use some feedback.

    been seing a girl for 3 weeks, had sex a couple of times, all is well.
    last weekend i left back home for two days (visit my rents), when i came back i saw her, and she wasnt feeling all so good (she seemed troubed and was sick and puking all over).

    thought it was just a bad virus. but no. intuition was right, because come monday morning i got the following text:

    her: thanks for everything you got me really glad i got to see you and sorry if i looked liked sh1t hope u had fun XD ill call u tmrw because i need to tell u something! xxx

    me --> casually replied asking what that thing was (i already knew). she then proceded by saying,
    "i just think things went too fast and i dont want anything too serious right now. ur not the problem, ure really great tho!" . classic. sad. lame.

    anyone who has some respect for himself will just move on. but shes a 10. and friends with benefits is not something i want. i want her back. but on my terms

    proceeded with the Freeze Out, didnt talk to her or initiate contact for 4 days now (i was still politely responding to some txts from her until friday of last week, so to not seem uninterested and rude), but she txt-ed me today, asking if all was ok.

    do i respond? by no means do i want to push her back even more.
    do i let it go and ignore her?
    if u need any other info ill provide

    Note: i know the reason for her dumping me was that she hooked up with another guy over the weekend i was gone, and she "didnt want to do this to me again", by that she meant, cheat on a guy who would was a little too good or her from the start --> info i got from her friend after promissing to keep this info to myself.

    any feedback will be GREATLY APPRECIATED!!!

  2. #2
    Sitfab's Avatar
    Sitfab is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    I don't actually remember where I heard this, but "He who cares least, controls the relationship". Since it's been a 3 week thing, you shouldn't care almost at all.

    But do respond, because if she still texts you, then that's a good thing. From what I see, she regrets the hook-up with that guy and secretly wants you back too. On the other hand, she might feel very guilty about what she did, so that might be the reason for the texting. I'm as unbiased as it can be.

    Proceed with the Freeze-Out for 2 more weeks and see where this is going. If she is still contacting you, then go for it.

  3. #3
    callmemister's Avatar
    callmemister is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    i gave it a thought and texted back, but just answered directly, didnt display any signs of interest in how she is doing, will keep at it! thanks!

  4. #4
    callmemister's Avatar
    callmemister is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    a week has past since the Freeze Out, and i got a text to which i dont want to respond before hearing ur opinion .. for some reason i need to get an objective point of view, somethig i find myself incapable of doing lately ..
    from day one we had this little silly thing going on to help her quit smoking .. she would have to give me a dollar (and place it in a jar) for every cig she smoked, the goal was essentially to see how much money she would waste on smokes and how many other things she could get for that money, the deal was that i would never touch any of that change (this may sound really corny and gay but it had her involved, and she took it seriously) -in that 3 week period some $30 are in there.

    but since the weird turnout of events, the plan was obviously stoped since i havnt seen her in over a week, as mentioned in the message above.

    money to me has no importance, espcialy a small amount like this, but i got the following text a couple of minutes ago and saw a chance to use it to perhaps turns things around.
    her: "did u go shopping with my $30"

    my question is, what do u think i should do? should i ignore and continue the freeze out? should i say that i did :P ? or perhaps remind her that the deal is still in effect and she will only get it after the completion of the program :P

    --> as u may now see, im still into her, and im trying to turn things around rather than be the one who will be at her mercy. so thanks again if u take the time to consider this msg!!!!

  5. #5
    Sitfab's Avatar
    Sitfab is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    You could say "Yeah, I bought 2 Lamborghinis, 5 houses, 2 swimming pools, a private jet, a Swarovski life-sized pony and a gift certificate from Toys'r'Us. What do you think i should get with the certificate, the Oompa Loompas collection or the GI Joe insanely bad-ass life sized Military base?"

  6. #6
    Sitfab's Avatar
    Sitfab is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    No problem at all, dude.

    The thing is that her giving you the message is a good thing. She could've said "i need my $30 back" or something to that effect.

    Go for it, dude.

  7. #7
    callmemister's Avatar
    callmemister is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    consider a possible response to that, dont you think it could lead to her asking for the 30 back (and its symbolic meaning of "were no longer doing this"), dont you think it would be better to let this one go and continue the Freeze Out, as she may have been seeing other guys, and perhaps wants to terminate this "connection" in order to feel ok and move on to the next one? this might seem as if im overthinking sh1t, but know that i really dont want to fark up.

  8. #8
    Sitfab's Avatar
    Sitfab is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    Don't you think she would have done that by now? What she is doing at this point is that she's testing your value. She wants ( yeah, WANTS ) to see if you get needy and clingy. But alas, you deliver the goods.

    Have you sent the message?

  9. #9
    callmemister's Avatar
    callmemister is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    i have man! and i guess that freeze outs work coz i coz two replies ..
    her: "i actully laughed out loud.."
    her: "ur such a looser! aha. im kidding obviously!"
    so far so good. but still very hesitant on whether i should build off that and use momentum or leave it as is

  10. #10
    Sitfab's Avatar
    Sitfab is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: could use some help!

    Build off, dude, you have great momentum, here.


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