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  1. #1
    ciladen is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Ex Already has New BF

    My ex of 2 years, with whom I had been living for one, broke up with me about a month ago. We spoke about long enough for her to tell me that it's really, definitely over. I've never really been a PUA guy, but I googled "How to get an ex back," and found some useful info, along with this site. On that advice, I cut off contact with her for about three weeks, and during that time she found a new BF.

    Yesterday I called about something innocuous, and acted like I was happy and over her. Later that night, she sent me a text message that said that she was glad that I was doing good, and that she missed me, and it was good to talk to me. I was a little surprised, and most of the advice I can find on the internet doesn't go much further than that.

    Does this mean anything? If so, what should I do next?

    Thanks

  2. #2
    ciladen is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Ex Already has New BF

    Seriously? Nothing? Since the last post, we've only texted about bullshit a few times. Any advice would be helpful and appreciated.

  3. #3
    AmericanCowboy is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Ex Already has New BF

    Tough spot man. I bought an ebook called the magic of making up. It has a system for getting her back, but also talks about time to cut your losses and improve your approach skills and roll on to the next one. google it, it costs 39 bucks if you want to give it shot

    Basically your supposed to agree your ok with the split, send her a handwritten letter stating that, along with a 4 sentence max Im sorry for whatever the problem is. then a mysterious Oh, I've had a change in fortune but I tell you about in the future because we both need our space now.

    Dont contact her for a month, then restart with a phone call for something small like a 10-15 coffee meeting.

    I know it sucks, I'm going through the same shit. Good luck man.

  4. #4
    evolve is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Just a little pat on the back

    ---forum keeps censoring my curse words, lol. Takes away from the emphasis I'm trying to portray.

    I'm not a pro at this sh1t but I can throw in my two cents. If she says that she misses you, it doesn't mean a farking thing ... you hear me (This has to be your mind set). Do not rely on your hopes and dreams! Your a bitch in my opinion if you do so. Do not even think that you care to be with her because it will show in your expression both verbally and non-verbally. If you express the need to want her back she will use your ass. Even if she gives you pussy under the conditions where you were being needy, she will use you and leave. But, the fact that she did make the "I miss you" comment does shed light on your situation, if you want her back. She is supplicating and has given you power. You need to allow her to come to you, to call you, and to text you more than you do her.
    You must take baby steps. Do not express any intimacy but do express friendship. She said she misses you ... good ... then text her back and ask if she wants to meet for some coffee or something innocent. DO NOT refer to this meeting as a date. You need to just say you want to catch up and chill. Don't be needy and don't express a sense of relief that your talking to her; just be cool, calm and collected and ask her to chill with you. Be a man and be direct without being an asshole. You pick the place and the time. Do not ask her for her opinion or what she thinks about a certain location. If the time is not good for her then pick another time that may be good for the both of you. Do not supplicate!
    The guy she is with could be a potential rebound and this might work in your favor. If she is hesitant on meeting you just mention that you agree with her that the break-up was the best thing for the both of you and that it would be a shame to throw away each others friendship --> This will knock down her defenses and open her up. If she turns you down, she is not ready and you must agree with her actions as if your not affected by it and let her ass go till' she comes back to you and then rinse and repeat.
    If and when you meet her ... DO NOT mention anything negative ... do not talk about the problems of your relationship ... do not mention the other guy. If she brings all this negative sh1t up then allow her to and you speak with her seriously about them but with composure. Do not cast blame on her either or she will get defensive. Also, if she does bring up this negative bullsh1t, you need to be keep it short and sweet. Don't delve to much on it and become her fukin' shoulder to cry on. Say that you will talk about those things with her at a later time so she feels that she will eventually get to speak her mind with you. You wear the farking pants and you need to show her (NOT tell her ... lol) that you do not need her.
    After the coffee and some pleasantries, get the fark out and say GOOD BYE; NOT I'll see you later or it was nice seeing you again or we' ll talk soon. Say you have some things to take care of and that you need to meet up with a friend. If at anytime, during the conversation, she mentions that you both should hang out then tell her to go do something else with you at a later time (preferably soon, like in a day or so) Throw out an event where you need to do something like go to the mall or that you need to go buy something and that she can tag along... from the second location, you can take her to eat or do whatever the hell you feel like doing. Now, if she doesn't mention hooking up then give her some time to warm up (a day or two) and text her back to meet up at another time. (This is a rule you must understand: If a girl turns you down twice for your proposal to date then you need to back out and leave her ass in a calm, cool and collected manner. Say, you agree with her and that you have to go take care of business somewhere or that you have sh1t to do and finish it off by telling her, you have a good one. Again, you set up the time and place, if she wants to hang out.
    On the second meeting you will try to be the playful and a confident friend only if she is giving you the signs. If she seems happy to see you then start playing smooth, flirty and confident but it has to be slow. Get a feel for how she is acting ... Only give in as much as she is giving you, which means if she is being a dull bitch you need to do what you came to do and get out and not contact her ass anymore until she comes back or she let's go of you (it's a risk but if you kiss her ass at anytime you will look like a bitch in her eyes and even worse, she will leave for you for the other man that she can easily rely on to fill her needs.)
    Now, if during your second meet up, everything goes well and she is flirting with you and wanting you then you need to close on her ass and get jiggy with it. Take her home and treat her like a farkin' slut. Eat her, make her nut, and remember why she loved you in the first place. Make her NUT three times ... fark it 4! lol. Then send me the tapes so I can post em' on bang bro's ... joking .
    Remember, you need to take it slow with her; never give her more than she is giving you and have her chase you a little bit ... do not act needy or express that you feel anything from the break up. Also, if you do meet up with her, you need to change your appearance and look fly. Get some awesome clothes; get a clean cut; trim your beard; get a fade; shave your fat bush ... if you have it ... i literally mean change your appearance and look sexy as fark.
    Get some good cologne and bring a sample of it with you so if you fark her in her house you can spray something of hers with it ... like a towel when you pretend to go to the bathroom or her pillow when she leaves the room ... what ever. Light single spray only... don't make it obvious that your doused her damn room with Polo. If all goes well, you should call her again and set up another date and another and fark her damn brains out till she forgets her other man and comes back to you.
    If she plays games with you at anytime by giving you the cold shoulder or saying she still wants to be with the other guy or that she wants to have you hand around in an open relationship like your a hood ornament then you need to leave her ass and go date other girls and let it be known (Example: Facebook: innocent pictures) so she can come crawling back to you ... If all of this fails, continue to date and find yourself some other pussy. It is guaranteed that after you catch some other trim that makes you wild in the bed, you'll forget her and move on. It's a win - win situation and you need to look at the situation like that if your going to attempt to get back with her ... If you don't harbor this mentality, she'll read it all off you like a blood hound and know your still not over her and she'll have the power. Remember brotha', you have the farking balls; you wear the pants; and you make the plans. She's just another piece of ass in your black book.

    This advice came from a product that I bought and I am not expressing any ownership, whatsoever, of the knowledge here presented. I just wanted to pass on some knowledge because I have been in your shoes and I understand how sh1tty the situation is for you right now. Don't dwell on memories of this girl. If it works, it works. If it doesn't work, change your self for the better and take the world by storm; that includes all the vagina in it.

  5. #5
    ciladen is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Ex Already has New BF

    Thanks a lot for the responses. This sounds like a solid plan. I will keep you posted about results.

  6. #6
    zarksky is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default

    FARCK THAT! I just broke up with my chick about a month ago. IDK how old you are but I'm in my early 20s and I lived with her for the same time as you. Move on its the best. I broke up with my girl once before then went back with her and it wasn't any different at first it was good then it got worse... but its a risk I took. I've moved on and life couldn't be better, I don't talk to her at all. She puts sh1t on facebook and I know she talks about me but I don't give a sh1t I just post sh1t about going on and hitting on chicks. Boom! Enjoy your life dude thats all I gotta say. I'm not a PUA or playa by any means but just enjoy yourself and the girls will take notice to your good energy and they will come If you build it they will come lol

    Good Luck to you man!


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