BIG PROBLEM WITH FOLLOW UP AFTER KISS CLOSE

Ok. So check this out. Have in mind that this girl, is very intelligent, beautiful and is not a girl just to have sex with, but have as my girlfriend.


I met this amazing HB8, last thursday at a club.... we talked for while, had a couple of drinks and dance a bit.. before she took off from the club I had some Kino going on and I got her phone number.
Late friday I txt her so the what was going on If she had any plans for the night.. she replied very nice and said that she was tired and was going to get some rest since she had to work early saturday.
I call her up con saturday afternoon and ask her if she wanted to go out, she accepted.. we when to a tapas place, has some wine, made a lot of conversation, then I start some kino on her.. and everything was fine. Happens to be that my big bro, was throwing a party at his new apartament, and she said, lets go to that party (since i previously talked to her about it)... so we went. In the party we kiss and started to make out (just kisses and gentle kino). We took off from my bro´s party around 330am and and left her in her house we kissed goodbye.

We agreed that we were going to go to the movies or something sunday night... she txt me around 5pm telling me that she was tired, and that she had a family reunion and that she couldn´t make for movies... she asked me if we could go another day. I replïed ¨sure no problem¨ would you like to do something earlier then? she replied that she had to do a lot of family stuff and that it was going to be difficult. I didnt wat to push things.. so i just saied... perfect, have fun, i´ll talk to you later.

around 10pm, i called her, she didnt answer... 15 mins later, she txt me saying that she was very tired and that she wanted to go to bed... and she just saied that and good night with a happy face.
Me instead of replying have a good night... started to talk to her by txt like I never read the good night thing... and she just sent me another txt saying AGAIN, that she was tired and wanted to go sleep. ... i just replied.. ¨ok, bye bye¨

Now, here´s the problem.. I DONT HAVE PACIENCE for this sh*t... I have a party tomorrow and I want to invite her, cuz i´m really into her, want to get to know her and bla bla bla... I couple of friends told to take step by step and advice just to send her today (later afternoon) a txt saying something like ¨hope things work out for you on work today... i been thinking of you ¨ something short and sweet.

I´m eating my brains out, cuz I don´t know if thats a good idea or what should i Do.

I need expert advice ASAP. This is a girl I certainly don´t want to miss out..

Yours truly,

Joms

Well, I'm definitely no expert, but another point of view could prove useful. Okay, so you two got some attraction going, and I don't see a big problem here, apart from your impatience. What can I say man... try to be patient, try to think of her putting you off by saying she's tired, etc. as a test. It looks to me like she's playing hard to get, seeing as she teased you with making out and now this cold shower. My advice to you is ride it out, be patient... if you want more from this girl than just sex. If I were you, I wouldn't have said "would you like to do something earlier?", but rather rescheduled for later (in my opinion one seems less hyped about the date, so that's kind of a neg). If you want this girl as your girlfriend, you should prove yourself supportive and understanding, and not just obsessed about seeing her (I know the wait is a motherf*cker... but that's just how things work). So invite her to this party, but don't put too much pressure on her, make it casual, make it seem like you aren't overly hyped (basically, return her level of interest). Oh, and about the texting, I wouldn't come out just saying "I've been thinking about you", instead, try to find some excuse for texting her, but along the same lines, like for example "Hey, I was at my moms house today, and encountered a flower that smells exactly like that killer perfume you had on that night, so if you could point me to a store that sells it... or you could put it on again for (some event)" In my opinion that's less corny than just saying you think about her, especially if you insert some humor. Like I said, I'm no expert,veeeery far from it, but that's my take on this, so I hope it helps. At least a little.

Peace

thanks man,
thats what ive been thinking of doing... just wait (it´s pain)...

i got another thought though... the cold shower she had might have come from another thing that i suspect.

she´s really good friend with a girl that despices me... this girl thinks i´m no good to girls, that i´m a player etc etc... so i can suspect that if she told her about hour good night out, this may have told her something like ¨this guy is not good for you, he´s not serios bla blah blah¨.
In that case, do you have any suggestions??

I was thinking of texting her today, but i think i´ll call her tomorrow instead.

Well in that case you have to prove this friend wrong. I would settle down a bit, to convey that "I don't want to get in your pants (...yet )" message, since they consider you a player. Get to know each other, go on some casual dates, with no physical intention from you. Women apparently like to feel respected, so that's what you should give her. Put your personality (and hers) in front of your...organ (I know it's difficult, but I didn't write the rules :P), again, I hope this helps.

Cheers

Thanks again man...
i´m gonna call her up on tomorrow afternoon, to see what shes upt to.. depending on her response i´ll invite her to go to my friends party... if i dont see that positive vibe i´ll back off...

i´ll write a follow up tomorrow... i need something to hold on to.

I hear ya on the being impatient. I used to struggle with that EXTENSIVELY and usually ended up blowing it because of that. Once I started dating multiple women, this became much less of an issue. While one girl was waiting / making me wait - I was dating someone else. It also allowed me to schedule dates in the future, creating the impression that I was busy and of high value (which I was).

Try it out.

what the others said is true, wait it out, but I am not here to say/reply the same way as they all might have...I think you did something you should not have done...

Girls want a leader, they want to be told what to do, where to go, and of course they actually want you to follow up with what you say...

"would you like to do something earlier?" is a question that puts her in charge...don't do it, I know things may already be working for you, but still. You should have thought of something to do, and told her straight out... "Tomorrow at place x, I'll pick you up" (just a random "command"...

Try to be a leader, when it comes to ladies, ...also the general response to "would you like to do something earlier?" or "What do you want to do" or "Where do you want to go" is usually, "I dunno/don't know what do you want to do" once they say that or similarly, ...you've already lost some of yours status...you want it to be high, not low...hope things work out with this chick of yours.

Wise words lagron... wise words

what do you guys think of call her today and COMMAND (lol i know this is how its done) to go grab a bite with me or something, or my friends party whatever.....? i think is ok, right?

but what should my move if she replies with some crappy bullsh*t like ¨ohh im tired or oh i have to go to my grandmas¨ cuz shes been doing that the last 48 hours. whay should i do is this comes up???


thanks for being interested in helping me

I prefer to let her know that I am doing something, but not make it seem like she is required for you to do it or have fun. More like, my buddies and I are going to this amazing show on Thursday. You should tag along.

Be completely outcome independent. If she say's no - basically don't have a bad response - just be like hey, no worries, but your missing out. Or something. Remember, she is not bringing value to you by attending, you are bringing value to her by giving her the chance to attend.