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  1. #1
    surferdude is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Should I drop her or use a new approach?

    I'm apologizing in advance because this is a long post. It involves a back story with a girl I've known for the last few years. I'm wondering at this point if I should cut the thread, or make a different move.

    So I've known this HB8 for the last three years. We lifeguarded together. I'm 22 and she's 19. The first summer she was dating this guy longterm, then the next summer they broke up and we started to hang out. It was probably once a week for the summer and we'd fool around but we didn't have sex because I was a bch.
    Last summer we were friends with benefits and hung out every few days. It was a pretty sweet time. I'm going into my third year of University away from my home town so I've only been home for summers. We got to a point where she said she wanted to know if I decided to sleep with anyone else (we weren't in a relationship though) so I don't know what you'd call that. I got head from another HB a couple times at the end of the summer before going back to school.

    We don't talk much during the school year because of distance and what's the point, but when my return in april was approaching she started messaging me about coming back. She was eager to see me. So I saw her once a week after I got home and we farked. Then the next 3 times we hung out over the next month and a half she was on her period. Yesterday we went kayaking and then I was thinking of escalating things after I got back. It seems I turned into her cuddle friend and we aren't having sex now. This is based off this one time since the other encounters she was on her period, but still.

    I was at a party last night and she had drinks with a few of her friends. She started texting me complaining about how she wasn't having any fun and asked if I could pick her up. etc. Here's how the texting went.

    Her: Want to come get me?
    Please?
    Please?
    Come get me now. I am so done with shore people. Pick me up please.
    My cell died.
    Hang out tmr?

    Me: I'm doing yard work all day, unless it's raining.

    Her: It is going to rain, aka I'm coming over.

    Me: maybe, I'll let you know if I'm free.

    Her: come

    Me: I can't. ask someone else.

    Her: I don't know anyone else.

    Me: then I don't know what to tell you.

    Her: I'm coming over. Accept it.
    Or just come over.
    Fact
    I'm coming over before I go home tomorrow morning
    Be home I set alarm for 730

    Me: I'm not sleeping at home tonight

    She texted this morning:
    I have no words. Sorry aha

    I replied:
    Ikr, I was like yeaaa not dealing with this.

    She never responded.
    She was obviously pretty drunk last night. She called me twice during that texting conversation. I just said a few things back and told her I'm with friends and can't talk on the phone. She's not acting the way she always has been. As far as other guys, she's been very busy with nursing clinical so I don't think someone else is farking her instead of me.

    I've been meeting other people on the side and been trying to settle into dating multiple people at one time. I'd like to get back to farking this HB regularly like last summer, while pursuing new girls because I'm leaving again in September.

    What do you recommend here? Should I drop her completely? She's not behaving the way I'd like and I should punish her for it. I think I'm going to wait it out and see how she tries to recover herself from this scenario.

    Any and all advice is greatly appreciated. I want to prepare myself for the multiple women lifestyle I intend on having once I get back to St. John's in september. I have a house 5 minutes from downtown that has potential for a lot of fun.

  2. #2
    surferdude is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I drop her or use a new approach?

    Oh I'd like to add that when I made a move to escalate in the hammock it didn't lead anywhere I wanted. It's like she just wasn't in the mood. When she mentioned that she had to shower I joked about joining her and she shut it down cold with "you aren't coming in the shower"
    Honestly she's farked in the head.

  3. #3
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Should I drop her or use a new approach?

    That choice is really up to you. She doesn't sound like too much of a bad girl, but you seem you want the multiple women scenario. Who knows, maybe you can put her on backburner until you are ready for an LTR. Hopefully she won't find someone when you are ready. However if you do choose to drop her, then this would be the perfect time to try out a new technique you weren't quite sure of and didn't want to risk it with someone else. Consider it a "social experiment"

  4. #4
    surferdude is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I drop her or use a new approach?

    I'm living in St. John's for the next three years straight, with the exception of christmas break. I can't have a LTR with her. Also we have different opinion of what we want when we settle down. I want kids and she doesn't. We aren't that serious. I look at her as a girl for right now, not down the road, but I have strong feelings for her none the less.
    The idea of a social experiment does spark my interest though.

  5. #5
    surferdude is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Should I drop her or use a new approach?

    I'd just like to update my scenario and say that I've reconnected with her on a deep level and we fucked last night, then showered together.
    I've restored the fling. All it took was confidence, being direct, and sexual escalation.


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