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  1. #1
    ShortStuff is offline PUA in Training
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    Default What to do with cling-ons?

    Last night I was out at a karaoke bar. Before going I'd killed a Skype interview for a program I was interested in and hit state. I walk in to find a couple of my friends sitting at the table, one a fairly cute chick and the other a (self-admitted) geeky "nice guy." Girl I've made out with before, chemistry is middling to good. I like geek, but I'm not sure what to do about him. Let me explain.

    For a huge chunk of the night, my body language is confident, I blow away the bar from stage, my conversation is great, and before I know it the chick is laughing and I'm kinoing her and close to the end of the night we're dancing close and sharing the same seat.

    Then I walk out for a moment to get some air and get a little chill time, come back in to find geek talking to girl about guys. She has guy issues. She doesn't want to sleep with any guys until they "respect her and don't just want her for her body." She's really afraid of getting emotionally farked over.

    Cool, I understand, except that now the mood is killed and she acknowledges as much - and tells me "I'm sorry for depressing you, have a nice night?"

    What. Was I supposed to leave here? I didn't.

    I stuck around and listened to them finish out the convo, then walked outside as the bar closed and stood around waiting for geek to take off (he didn't). She's not into geek, but she does talk about/like some of the same stuff. They start talking about geeky stuff, I'm starting to lose the ability to relate, the chemistry I had with the girl seems to vaporize.

    Instead of getting to close this girl as far as it could go, I walked to my car with the sounds of geek rattling off his dislike for Dr. Who. Fark me.

    What should I have done differently here?

  2. #2
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What to do with cling-ons?

    Juggler had a technique he called Flopsy.

    He was talking to some girls during the day and in the middle of a great convo with two of them, someone came by with a rabbit named Flopsy. The girls went nuts and forgot all the about him. Needless to say he lost them. I think lol.

    Anyways it taught him something. That sometimes things will pull her attention away from you. The way to handle it? Join in. Then take her away.

    What you could've done is simply sympathize with her just like geek was. Except change the subject once you had her attention back.

    Say things like "Yea. I understand. That sucks." then say "that reminds me of the time when...." then use that to bring it back to a more positive subject and the attention back on you.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  3. #3
    ShortStuff is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: What to do with cling-ons?

    I had her attention, and then some, for a good chunk of the night. It's isolating, especially from people that have nowhere else to go and really want to talk, that I don't know how to do properly.

    I did do like you said though, tried to lighten the mood. And it worked pretty well, just the conversation went in a direction I just didn't know what to do with, and by that point it didn't feel right to try and Isolate.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: What to do with cling-ons?

    You made it seem like you lost her attention to your geek friend. Not that the issue was isolating.

    Use the Flopsy technique to get her back and send your friend home. Not too difficult.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  5. #5
    ShortStuff is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: What to do with cling-ons?

    Quote Originally Posted by BatMan View Post
    send your friend home. Not too difficult.
    That's actually the part I'm having trouble with. What do I tell him?

  6. #6
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    Default Re: What to do with cling-ons?

    Well obviously he's a terrible wingman so I'd just be direct with him. Pull him to the side and say that you want to spend some time with her alone.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."


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