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  • 2 Post By DirectIsBest

Thread: Each couch date Escalating, now shes pulling back?

  1. #1
    gamer1138 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Question Each couch date Escalating, now shes pulling back?

    SHORT VERSION:
    hanging out with a girl often at night on my couch, things kept escalating each time. now she isnt even touching anymore, but still likes to come over and lightly kiss.

    BACKSTORY:
    met a girl on tinder and she has seemed very interested since day one where we met at a bar. kissed on second date. third date and onward she has been coming over and watching movies at my place at night. she says she isnt interested in anything serious, but texts me everyday and almost everyday asks to hang out. i am almost never the first person to text or to talk about hanging out. this started almost 2 weeks ago and we have hung out around 7-8 times.

    DESCRIPTION:
    whenever she comes over i put my arm around her on the couch and she wraps herself around me in a sort of close cuddling position. whenever we start making out though, she stops and says "i am behaving myself. im a good girl" or "i am restraining myself." the most we have ever made out decently was probably less than 2 minutes before she pulled back and stopped.
    yet, when on the couch watching movies she has lightly felt my d*** over the pants. she has even made a few remarks about how big it is and said "how are you single with that thing?". one of the next times we hung out i had my hand under her bra and she was feeling IT under my pants while casually watching the movie (she still would make remarks about the film during this). i tried slipping her hand under my boxers and she pulled back, but felt it over them again.
    the next night she messaged me at midnight saying she was hanging out with friends and to come over. i was too tired to drive across town and told her i was going to bed. she said if i changed my mind i could always "stay over here *wink*". i didnt answer.
    the next day she texted and half invited herself over for that evening. i thought for sure things would escalate. but i kept getting the pull back on the makeouts and she didnt even touch me at all like she had been. thought she was going to sleep over as it was 3am and we were watching a film in a blanket and she was about to fall asleep, but she said she had to take off because she needed to get good sleep that night in her bed. she texted me a couple minutes after she left saying "sorry, i am super tired and have allergies. ill make it up to you soon i promise ".
    i assume the "sorry" is for either not staying the night or not escalating with me that night. i didnt want to come off as bitter, so i responded and said "sleep well " and she said to "sleep well also." (she always texts back. even when unneeded)

    so, is she just teasing me? each time she makes me feel like the NEXT time it is it. im not being needy because she is doing all the work, im just allowing her to come over.

    im guessing i should do a Freeze Out? maybe take a lot longer to answer her texts for awhile and be "busy" each night for half a week or so?

    (i am new at this, this is my first post)

  2. #2
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    DirectIsBest is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Each couch date Escalating, now shes pulling back?

    No! Don't freeze her out! If you do I will slap you. Moving on...

    I think she probably knows you are frustrated and enjoys the power she has. She basically has it all right now. You need to flip the script on her. Insinuate that she is seducing you and just trying to get in your pants. Make her out to be the aggressor. Tell her you caught her checking out your package. If you get off the couch to grab something turn around and make fun of her for checking out your ass. This is called a role-reversal and works WONDERS on women. In fact, I just did the same thing this Friday. I took a girl home and then made fun of her for "trying to seduce me" and totally made her think it was "her" idea. Silly girl.

    Another strategy reinforcing the above. When you go to kiss her turn your head at the last second and brush your cheek against hers. Then pull away and look her in the eyes. When she comes after you lean back as far as you can. Repeat. When she really gets hot tell her "I don't think we should do this". Read my guide The guide: Blasting through LMR on this forum for a more detailed approach. Cheers!

  3. #3
    gamer1138 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Each couch date Escalating, now shes pulling back?

    Thank you for your quick response, Direct.
    Although it feels a little tricky for me to pull off as all the kissing etc starts with me it seems. And the "checking out the package" line is good but she seems to have stopped her touching all together. But I will work on this and try.
    I thought for sure a Freeze Out would be what people would say to try (again, I am new at this). Aren't I supposed to do freeze out if she is with drawling? Maybe I don't understand the freeze out tactic.
    Also I will read that LMR detail. thanks

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    Default Re: Each couch date Escalating, now shes pulling back?

    UPDATE:
    How do I respond to her new text?

    When she seemed like she was going to stay over but left at the last minute, that was Last night. Anyways she just Now texted me "sorry, I was way tired"... I guess referring to leaving and not staying. So that's the second time she apologized. Keep in mind I didn't get on her case or say she "should" sleepover. So she must just realize that I assumed that would be happening.

    How do I respond?
    Do I say something like "sorry for what?", or do I make a joke like "it's ok. In fact I was a little worried you were going to try and seduce me so maybe not staying the night was best "

    I'm not sure what to do!

  5. #5
    gamer1138 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Each couch date Escalating, now shes pulling back?

    UPDATE:
    now she added "Hows your day, going?"

    I havent replied to her at all today yet. but i guess i should within the next hour if i am not doing a Freeze Out..

  6. #6
    gamer1138 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Each couch date Escalating, now shes pulling back?

    Btw , just in case anyone was about to answer, I already responded to her by now.

    maybe I won't do a Freeze Out but just become less available.
    I feel like she thinks I am her plaything and is in total control. maybe she will want me more if I am less available.

    Also this is my first thread so I apologize if I am using the forums wrong or giving too much information or something


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