Ok so I think something clicked this weekend which resulted in me pushing solid game to the point that it really did make me realize about my inner game.
A little background and I think someone out there might be able to relate to a point in which it may help them.
I was born in a 3rd world country. Grew up very shy with a low self-steem. Came to the united states still being put down due to racism, and other crap.
Anyway I enlisted in the military and as time went on I became proficient in my job, my attitude changed, and one day I became something I would say 99% of Marines wish they could be a one point or another. I became a Drill Instructor. This is what I have found to be the most envied job in the Marines, and is respected by many all over the world.
Anyway, before I got into this pick up deal I still felt I had a low view of myself. It wasn't until a year ago that something began to change and by luck I found this site and the community. I began challenging myself on all the things I feared and little by little my confidence level grew.
Last week I began having inner game issues once again so like most of us I got on the net trying to find threads with regards to inner game and thankfully I found many. Some from this site and other forums out there. The more and more I read something really clicked in my head and it's this.
I am 31. In my life time I have seen some pretty crappy stuff. I have almost died a number of times. I have saved the lives of Marines and wanted nothing in return. I have ran across a freeway to save civilians seconds after an accident without hesitation. I have trained over 600 civilians to become Marines. Have processed over 1000 prior to their training. I have managed multimillion dollar accounts successfully with very few bodies to assist me in the mission and still produced outstanding results! My name is literally known by many out there and stories will be told about me even after I die. So I asked myself, why the fuck am I tripping about approaching a woman and saying Hi, or hey or have you seen my baseball lol.
In other words I realized I am an Alpha male in my realm. I have done enough to prove to myself that no tiny 21yr old girl or whatever freaking age is going to put me down to the point I will be sad about it, and allow her to destroy my self-esteem.
So gentlemen. In a nutshell what I am getting at is that you need to look at your accomplishments and realize that this is life. No woman out there should be allowed to control your inner frame. Walk into a bar/club or whatever thinking to yourself that it is her pleasure to meet you! not the other way around and if she doesn't want to take a chance with you then fuck her! she can have fun with her vibrator or the dumb ass beta leaning against the bar looking sorry for himself. I have told plenty of women that the beta line is that way and to have fun with it. I wont trip because there are literally thousands out there and I have no time to waste it on someone boring with poor taste.
Alpha males walk/talk/act/think/live/piss and die knowing they are Alphas. If you don't feel it then take the time to write down all your accomplishment and use them to psych yourself out. Go out there and deliver, if it flops then fuck it keep moving! I remember running up hills with a heavy ass pack and weapons screaming at young kids to keep moving forward, and when it was all said and done we made it to the top. They came up to me and said thank you for not letting them quit. Their families did the same for me with tears in their eyes. So I tell myself to keep moving forward. It's a rough ride but I'm sure that once you start making it pretty freaking high you will look back and realize that you have made it along way from who you were and laugh about it because you see who you are now.
So! I see myself how I am now and wonder how much better I'll be tomorrow. I have two choices. I either stop moving and sit idle or I move forward. DON'T EVER SIT IDLE! ALPHA THE FUCK UP AND PUSH IT AS HARD AS YOU CAN!
To my bros who served with me.
"When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.”