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  1. #1
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    Default Is jealousy good or bad?

    Recently I have thought over the concept of jealousy once again, and I must say I am now largely concerned about myself over a trait I am now cautious to call an advantage.

    I viewed jealousy as being very bad. It could destroy relationships, it can drive you to take actions out of greed if things get too severe, and it's overall unattractive to anybody. I almost never feel jealousy as an emotion. I don't get jealous towards anybody else, nor do I get jealous if my girlfriend hangs out with other guys.

    Recently I have seen potential positives in jealousy. Jealousy can also drive you to protect that which you want in a relationship. This, I believe, is a large driving factor in relationships in the emotional aspect.

    My big fear is that because I don't feel jealousy (like ever) that I am at a huge disadvantage for relationships. That's because I don't have that same driving force to keep what I get, and this makes it more likely for the relationship to fall apart.

    Right now I'm just mixed up on this. Thoughts and opinions on this subject gentlemen?
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

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    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Is jealousy good or bad?

    I tend to find a slight amount can be okay at times. If you always just act nonchalant and like you don't care, over time she will start feeling that way. That being said, you are displaying that she a your weakness when you act on any kind of jealousy you put forth some vulnerability: just like any other weapon it depends on how she uses it.

    I would think more along the lines of how you can show a girl that you care, rather than getting jealous as I feel that your underlying problem is that you aren't showing your girlfriends that bit of emotion by being "not-jealous" and "not-needy" to the extreme. It's okay to open up to someone you are in a relationship with every now and then, and actually very unhealthy for the progress of that relationship if you don't.

    Neither extreme is a good one, there must be a middle ground.
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