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Thread: a rant for self happiness

  1. #1
    minislim82 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default a rant for self happiness

    ok so I dunno really why I feel I should write all this but im sure ive read somewhere writing it down takes a weight off you're shoulders? anyway im basically so dejected with dating its driving me nuts wether it be in real life or online dating. I have been single for 15 months had in that time 9 dates so I thought that's fairly good but the more I read of people getting 3 dates a week apparently its not. all those have come from dating sites or dating apps (pof and/or tinder). but lately or past few months at least im just not getting any attention not even being noticed. no passing girls in a street and getting a cheeky smile, no nervous shy flirting from girls across a counter. and the dating sites follow a similar trend no profile views even though I try and keep my profile active and appear online. always thought I wasn't bad looking if I have to fill out a survey and it said "appreance" id but down atteactive or very. its very dejecting on a site like pof where you have all these singles and no views let alone messages. and even if I do send some out I get 0 replies and its crushing. tinder was a lot more fun for me as I travel around my area a lot with work but if I was to set a 50mile radius id find majority of that radius was woodland and another would be open ocean as I live near a coast and in a small city. I know you need to take dating sites and apps with a pinch of salt and not take them to seriously but all those singles and no views? ive had several pof accounts over the months changed photos, profile discriptions etc but nothing has improved the luck I have there. even my facebook page is against me. although im slowly learning not to give my facebook name to any of these girls coz for some reason as soon as they know me on facebook they go quiet I spent a good couple hours removing pics and editing up stuff but nothtign changed I was still getting the silient treatment this happened with aboutn 7-8 girls id met through dating sites that didn't get a date with

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
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    Default Re: a rant for self happiness

    How is your online profile put together?

    If it's the usual / typical "selfie" photos & description that says something like "I'm a normal laid back guy who likes movies, music & hanging out with my friends..." then proceeds to tell everything about you, then that's probably where the problem is.

    You MUST stand out from every other chump who is also on those sites.
    Their profiles are basically just as I described.

    You need INTERESTING pictures of yourself (Including some with friends) as well as a written section that just gives little clues about you, and creates a mystique to make the girls want to know more about you.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: a rant for self happiness

    About the description of yourself, I'd write something like: "I'm a sophisticated zen master, with loads of swag. I give lectures in Harvard about how to burp Bohemian Rhapsody in russian."

  4. #4
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    Default Re: a rant for self happiness

    Online dating is very surface level driven for women as much as it is for men. Men are driven more toward primal instincts and obviously drive things on a surface level of looks. Women do the same even through photos based on the photos she sees. Having talked to many many people about online dating ultimately everything on their is a lie. When you meet someone they're still less likely to be someone you thought of them to be. Expect to be catfished based on looks as well as defining interests and information on profiles.

    There was a Vice interview video released not too long ago where a woman who wrote about online dating / sex and more talked about how everything online can still be misleading. She continued to talk about how her friends even turned away from googling someone before dates. Her friend was about to go on a date with a comedian whom she met on POF and said she didnt want to cloud her judgement about her date based on the comedy act / routine he did on youtube videos. It seems legit right? Sadly most people do this even when looking at profiles. She later said from her own experience that she dated a guy whom she thought was ultimately charming and sweet and dated having met only in person and when she got to finally see his dating profile it made sense why he had pictures on his online profile which would have been a turn off having seen them on a dating site and not having met him in person.

    What im trying to say is consider changing your game in person if you are tired of the results you're getting online. Amp things up more when you meet a girl in person. Learn to flirt and build that attraction before building rapport.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: a rant for self happiness

    ok so I dunno really why I feel I should write all this but im sure ive read somewhere writing it down takes a weight off you're shoulders? anyway im basically so dejected with dating its driving me nuts wether it be in real life or online dating. I have been single for 15 months had in that time 9 dates so I thought that's fairly good but the more I read of people getting 3 dates a week apparently its not. all those have come from dating sites or dating apps (pof and/or tinder). but lately or past few months at least im just not getting any attention not even being noticed. no passing girls in a street and getting a cheeky smile, no nervous shy flirting from girls across a counter. and the dating sites follow a similar trend no profile views even though I try and keep my profile active and appear online. always thought I wasn't bad looking if I have to fill out a survey and it said "appreance" id but down atteactive or very. its very dejecting on a site like pof where you have all these singles and no views let alone messages. and even if I do send some out I get 0 replies and its crushing. tinder was a lot more fun for me as I travel around my area a lot with work but if I was to set a 50mile radius id find majority of that radius was woodland and another would be open ocean as I live near a coast and in a small city. I know you need to take dating sites and apps with a pinch of salt and not take them to seriously but all those singles and no views? ive had several pof accounts over the months changed photos, profile discriptions etc but nothing has improved the luck I have there. even my facebook page is against me. although im slowly learning not to give my facebook name to any of these girls coz for some reason as soon as they know me on facebook they go quiet I spent a good couple hours removing pics and editing up stuff but nothtign changed I was still getting the silient treatment this happened with aboutn 7-8 girls id met through dating sites that didn't get a date with

    alright, aside from all the good online dating advice you've gotten from those great pua's, I'd like to touch on something else I noticed about your post.

    quit expecting the girls to come to you.

    I noticed that you're mad because women aren't noticing you, but what are you really doing to get noticed?

    do you ever approach girls in bars and clubs? or even on the street or in the grocery store?

    if you want the girls, you've got to put in the work.

    online dating is based solely on the idea that people can just set up a profile and people will come to them. (basically its made to be dating for lazy people)

    any attractive girls online can pretty much have their pick of the guys there, and believe me, they are only going to take the cream de la cream.

    this means that If you want success online, you have to be way better than all the other guys who hit on them regularly.

    versus with in person game, you just have to be able to have a conversation and steer it in the right direction.

    now, since you want success with online dating I won't bore you by telling you how much better in person game is over online game. instead i'll tell you how I've had mild success with online game.


    from my experience, I have found that the best way to keep girls from over-judging your profile is to just keep it simple.

    that means:
    1. no more than a few good pictures and an eye catching profile picture that either demonstrates social proof, a healthy body, or an adventurous lifestyle.

    2. keep your description simple. just 2-3 sentences with some little joke or double entendre that's easy for them to get.

    3. lastly, you have to send out a ton of messages if you want very many dates (and I would suggest using a routine stack for at least the first few messages you send to a girl to get her interested)


    I have been single for 15 months had in that time 9 dates
    as for this, you shouldn't compare the amount of dates you've had with the amount of time you've been single, instead, compare the amount of dates you've had with the amount of girls you've approached or messaged. I bet your numbers really aren't that bad.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: a rant for self happiness

    Quote Originally Posted by meteora View Post
    I have been single for 15 months had in that time 9 dates

    as for this, you shouldn't compare the amount of dates you've had with the amount of time you've been single, instead, compare the amount of dates you've had with the amount of girls you've approached or messaged. I bet your numbers really aren't that bad.
    And also, you should not worry too much about comparing. There will always be a guy getting laid more than you, more often, longer, and with prettier girls. The number is not the goal.
    'The Game is what gives a PUA his power. It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the world together.'


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