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  1. #11
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    Quote Originally Posted by EMSaenz View Post
    You are a walking contradiction. "...all my friends have stabbed me in the back..." And now, "...I take martial arts and don't let anyone walk over me."

    That's your problem.

    You call my stuff BS. Well my BS has given me many wonderful & fulfilling relationships w/women. Even now at almost 60 years old, I am dating women in their early 20s, but my main squeeze is 50 & and looks 30.

    Call it the void if you want, but if you find that the term "being a man" is hot air a.k.a. Fluff and to be a man is an abstract idea. Then you just don't get it.

    If your coming off to women the way you are in here, then I see why you turn them off. They can read you pessimism from a block away.

    I have love handles, drive an old rusted out Blazer, not rich, but I am very optimistic, positive, confident and it shows in my attitude. Don't tell women you do karate,it scares them. Especially, if you act wierd already.
    My friends have stabbed me in the back.
    All of my best friends have.
    I haven't had any close friends in about 4 years because of it. I don't trust people and wont let them in for fear of them stabbing me in the back.

    Acquaintances, girls I might've been initially attracted to. They're not in my inner circle nor a very big part of my life. They don't have the leverage to stab me in the back.

    Like my friend Dan. He was a close friend. I let him stay at my house and he stole some of my shit. I never spoke to him again and it wasn't worth it to send any message since I ended up moving out of that area anyway.

    Or my friend Charles, who taught me martial arts [the little I know], stole my stereo system. I had trusted him [since I had known him since 10th grade and at this point I was 22] enough to leave the speakers at his house. I used to be his room mate, when I moved out he said I wasn't taking them with me and physically prevented me from taking them. I had no legal proof they were mine either, so if I did anything to get them back the court would see it as me stealing from him.

    These are people Close to me [my best friends] fucking me over because I trust them.

    Darshawn, the guy I used a fake face book to beat up, is fat and out of shape. He's not very smart either. He doesn't know how to fight very well also. Beating him up wasn't difficult for someone who works out and does martial arts.

    It's not that I'm giving BS or contradictions as much as you're trying to find leverage to show you're better off than me and create a contrast. At least this is how I'm perceiving it.

    What you're saying is Bull shit.
    I never said you aren't getting results and don't care about your bragging about how many girls you're getting. I said that your advice isn't useful.

    If you ask Michael Jordan how to shoot a basketball and he says "You gotta man up and just gotta feel it." I would say it's total horse shit and bs advice with absolutely no substance. This doesn't mean that he has a bad shot, just that his advice sucks balls.

    If her says "You aim the elbow of your shooting hand at the hoop, use your other hand to guide the ball, shoot it up so it has less chance of being blocked or bouncing out of the rim as it comes down, aim at the back of the rim, Flick your wrist for rotation to the ball to decrease the chance of it bouncing out of the rim, use your legs for more power, and have the same foot as your shooting arm forward to help aim." I wouldn't say that was bs advice. That's advice that someone can read and apply.

    You don't seem to understand what I'm saying.
    You may get results and have girls etc. etc.. That doesn't make you a good teacher. Nor does it make your advice any less bullshit. Pointing out that you get results and saying that this means that your advice is good advice [even though it's very very vague and abstract] makes me think you lack reasoning skills. In other words, YOU'RE FUCKING STUPID.

    Getting girls isn't a sign of intellect either. Some of the smartest people I know, struggle with girls. Some of the dumbest people I know get them all the time.

    Try to say something that's more concrete. Think about what you're doing that working, not something abstract like "manning up brah." Or "giving 110%" or "Cowboying up" or "Being a man." Those are all very abstract phrases.

    Something like "Ask open ended questions instead of yes or no questions because the open ended questions give a longer more interesting response that people like to get involved in. You get the know the other person, and you can talk about their reply, rather than a simple yes, or no." Or maybe "Try to stand out, fashion wise. Were something that's not traditional for the area you're in and it will catch other people's attention."
    Or even "somewhere in the conversation play the question game. The rules you explain to her are that you can't ask a question someone asked you and the questions have to be interesting. You gradually get more and more sexual with the questions [pssss, examples are also a good thing to use when trying to teach someone things or giving advice. It helps give a reference]. e.g. Ask how old she was when she had her first crush, then ask her to tell you about her first kiss, then her favorite place on her body to be kissed, and so one. Also if she's talking about the answers, this is good, the game is letting you get to know each other and you're making the conversation more sexual."

    You know, things like that. Those are much more concrete and empirical than abstract emotionally driven advice like "You gotta man up." That's pretty pointless bs. Since you're into PUA I'm assuming you should understand that what a phrase like "man up" means to one person isn't the same for everyone. Most emotional phrases don't have a universal meaning and thus are very shitty phrases for advice.

    I'm sure as hell glad you don't write text books. I'd have to read a Chemistry book talking about how you "gotta man up and mix these chemicals and shit to get that reaction and then BOOM!!!!".

  2. #12
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    I think your problem right now is that you're way too angry to be yourself. Instead of being 'you', which is usually when you're relaxed and comfortable, you walk around with an angry face being mad at the world. It makes you take things way too personal. I gave you 'didn't get a date yesterday?' as an example, and you write an entire frustrated paragraph on why you didn't actually have one yesterday. It's an example, bro.

    You say you despite loads of evaluation you don't know what you're doing wrong with people. Based on your OP and first reply to EMSaenz and me I think you were too nice at first, and suddenly turned into too much of an assh*le now. Take the middle ground!

    Further on you write you have an extreme mistrust in everyone. How do you expect to make friends and/or girlfriends if you don't trust anyone a single bit?

    Retaliating against people and letting everyone know what happens if they fark with you just makes you seem really weird in the eyes of those you are yet to meet. If you then later on meet them they'll be like 'oh... that's the weirdo who set that guy's bike on fire' (<---EXAMPLE!!) or whatever.

    About Jennifer Gonzales: You really behaved like a farking assh*le to her. You could have just said 'no'. But instead you embarrass her twice in front of her friends by yelling out a completely retarded reaction. You were hitting it off with a girl you liked and for no good reason decided to just end it all by being an a complete arse. She may have asked you for a dress as an excuse to go out shopping with you. Or maybe she was poor. Maybe she wanted to make sure she looked pretty for you so you'd have to provide opinions on dresses. Jesus, what is a cheap dress? $10, $15? Come on, there is no one to blame here but you.

    'I've got the never get stepped on and walked over thing down'. Are you farking serious? What you do is avoid any human contact that goes beyond small talk by acting retarded. You will not get what you want by doing what you do now. If you keep doing the same things, you're going to keep getting the same results.

    Then you get punched in the face by some guy at two occasions - and all you do is call a cop the second time around? So you're attacking people you like by yelling at them and are too afraid to fight back when someone that can actually hurt you attacks? Fark that he has worse girl problems than you. You didn't do anything wrong and I thought you were not to be stepped on and walked over. What the hell, dude? Then he makes you look like a loser in front of your friends and you let him pussy out? Come on! After that you take revenge with the hot French girl thing. But seriously, everyone who hears about that will just think that's really weird. Though had you fought him while he was b*llsh1tting you, ok. That happens. PUAs and alphas avoid fighting as much as possible as it's beta - but will only do so if someone keeps stepping on them.

    Now in your latest reply, again you're just putting someone else down. EMSaenz is just trying to help out and all you say is 'Your advice sucks so you're farking stupid'. THAT IS WHY YOU DON'T HAVE ANY NORMAL RELATIONSHIPS with either men or women. Act like a moron and find yourself with moronic friends who will fight you for your CD player. Act like a nice guy and find yourself with nice people and people who will take advantage of you. Either filter those last ones out or choose option number three: balance. Act normal and if people give you sh1t once, forgive and forget if they are willing to act normal from now on in. Second time, fark 'em.

    Most people get along fine with most other people, so if you can't that's really not their fault. I'd advice you to see some kind of consultant to help you think and feel more socially.

  3. #13
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    EMSaenz is offline PUA With Mad Respect
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    Okay. Step by step guide to Manning Up:

    1) Your inner voice must say, "I am priceless and everyone knows it!"

    2) Keep your faith in people. You deserve good reliable friends and they deserve you.

    3) Manning Up is an obligation to society. It is the universal concept of being healthy, wealthy and wise for the specific reason of making babies.

    4) Manning Up is the tangible attitude of success that people can notice in you. Just like men can judge the size of a woman's breast from a block away, women can notice a man's self confidence or lack of from a block away too.

    I wasn't bragging, I was giving you an example that if an old fart like me can do it, so can you. I was trying to give you hope.
    Carpe diem!

  4. #14
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    Chime is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    Virgil,
    Jen was a bitch. she wasn't work the ground I, or anyone else, walks on. She tried to milk me out of my money and did the same to every other guy I saw her with in high school. Years later I ended up meeting her sister and added her to facebook. Her sister said that she was mean to everyone around her and always tried to use people to get over on them.

    I was seemingly hitting it off with a girl who I liked, till she displayed that the quality I liked in her wasn't a quality she had. So I didn't like her anymore.

    You are right about me being nice at first, then getting pissed people took advantage. I used to be forgiving and give second chances, till I noticed people would just do the same again. So, my reaction was to make sure no one tries to screw me over since it seemed everyone did.

    I get what you're saying about people being adverse to someone who's that angry with people. I am pretty mistrusting of everyone and some of my newer friends don't get why I wont open up to them or trust them with certain things [like hanging out in a lounge where people are playing video games. I wont leave unless my games are on my person, not even just to smoke a cigarette, despite knowing them for a few months. Because situations like that have ended up with me getting my shit stolen before].

    The fight.
    The first time I thought that'd be the end of it. This is someone I'll never really talk to again. The second time is a good example why I hate people. The bar we were at hold tournaments for fighting games like street fighter, tekken, marvel vs capcom, etc.. I didn't care for the bar as much as going there for the fighting game community, practicing to get better at the game when they're just playing, then entering tournaments. It took a lot of time and effort for them to get established in the bar. Even just to get a foot in the door was work.

    When he hit me there I wasn't going to start a bar fight and have the owner of the bar thinking . o O ( These people with their games are just causing trouble for my bar, let's kick them out of here. No more gaming in my bar! ). So I didn't fight back out of respect for what they worked so hard to accomplish. Instead I walked away and called the police.

    We were both kicked out of the bar. No one asked for any side of the story either. I was told that I would have to apologize if I ever wanted to come back and I was banned for 2 weeks from showing up. He was also banned for two weeks. I refuse to ever apologize for being attacked when I've done absolutely nothing to provoke it. So I stopped going to that bar and stopped promoting that community, I never retaliated against them. I just left and never spoke to them again.

    The sent me e-mails and messages on facebook demeaning me and saying that if I ever wanted to come back in their group I owed them an apology. I responded "Do not send me more messages." the first time, then blocked them the 2nd time.

    This is why I didn't hit back. For the sake of what they worked hard to get. I was treated like shit for it. And the guy who hit me, who did owe the group an apology, apologized, then started saying horrible things and I lost my temper and beat his ass. The rest of that group, when I would run in to them never once talked down to me or demeaned me after that.

    Why do you say "Fark" instead of "fuck"? You're thinking of the word, just say it.


    I really don't know what the middle ground is.
    I get the concept. I just don't know what I'm going too far while standing up for myself or if I'm not doing enough. I've always done a through job with anything.

    I guess people are going to think I'm weird. People think this anyway and have. A consultant wont help me, he'll just suggest a few ideas and I'll have my own opinion on them.

    What I really don't get though is something like this. I meet a girl at the plaza. It seems to go well, all she knows of me is me at the plaza being nice to everyone around me [cause no one's causing problems so I'm be default a nice person]. I get her phone number and we text a little bit. We're going to hang out sunday. Sunday comes and she doesn't call or text [she said she's call me]. I text at some point and there's no response. So I don't text anymore and move on. She doesn't matter anymore except in the sense that I don't know what the fuck went wrong and I don't want to mess up with the next person I meet.


    Then there's the advice thing.
    Like I said before if Michael Jordan says in order to shoot a basketball you have to "Feel it, man up, have a greater sense of self deep down, and give 110%" It's not very helpful or useful advice, despite him having an amazing shot. If he says "Aim the elbow of your shooting hand towards the rim, put rotation on the ball so it wont bounce out as far, shoot with as much arc as you can so it's more vertical than horizontal when it makes it to the basket thus lowering the chances it'll bounce out, lead with the same foot as your shooting hand, and use your other hand as a guide." This is advice that gives directives, not abstract emotions and feelings, that can be applied. This is useful, the former isn't.


    Quote Originally Posted by EMSaenz View Post
    Okay. Step by step guide to Manning Up:

    1) Your inner voice must say, "I am priceless and everyone knows it!"

    2) Keep your faith in people. You deserve good reliable friends and they deserve you.

    3) Manning Up is an obligation to society. It is the universal concept of being healthy, wealthy and wise for the specific reason of making babies.

    4) Manning Up is the tangible attitude of success that people can notice in you. Just like men can judge the size of a woman's breast from a block away, women can notice a man's self confidence or lack of from a block away too.

    I wasn't bragging, I was giving you an example that if an old fart like me can do it, so can you. I was trying to give you hope.
    This is much more concrete and applicable. Seems like decent advice as well. Thanks.

  5. #15
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    Okay, now there are coming other sides to the stories that show you basically did the right thing with Jen and the gamers. Although I think you shouldn't have ashamed her in front of her friends. You should have stood above that. As for the gamers: I think you did the honorable thing.

    If you don't understand what the middle ground is, and don't want to visit a consultant, I recommend reading a book or two on the matter. It'll help you understand people's actions and expectations towards you more. Just like reading a PUA book makes us understand women's actions and expectations more.

    The plaza girl thing is really just a flake. There's plenty of fish in the sea and all of us fark up a couple of times.

    As for 'fark'... the forum automatically edits swearing. For example, f*ck turns into fark, sh*t turns into shit, etc.

  6. #16
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    Quote Originally Posted by Virgil View Post
    Okay, now there are coming other sides to the stories that show you basically did the right thing with Jen and the gamers. Although I think you shouldn't have ashamed her in front of her friends. You should have stood above that. As for the gamers: I think you did the honorable thing.

    If you don't understand what the middle ground is, and don't want to visit a consultant, I recommend reading a book or two on the matter. It'll help you understand people's actions and expectations towards you more. Just like reading a PUA book makes us understand women's actions and expectations more.

    The plaza girl thing is really just a flake. There's plenty of fish in the sea and all of us fark up a couple of times.

    As for 'fark'... the forum automatically edits swearing. For example, f*ck turns into fark, sh*t turns into sh1t, etc.
    In hindsite, I think it was childish as hell with Jen. Then again I was in high school and new to the whole women thing [my first crush was at 15 years old (thanks home schooling)]
    The gamers. Fuck them. "Yeah they deserve to die and I hope they burn in hell" - Sammy J. in "A time to kill."

    Ah, that's what the whole Fark thing is... interesting.

    Yeah, with the whole thing you mentioned earlier about people thinking I'm going to burn their house down I think it's extremely stupid and part of media conditioning, etc. etc.. However I'm aware I don't have much control over media conditioning about those sorts of things [the word escapes me at the present.]. There are certain situations that work in my favor when it comes to that, very EXTREME situations where me being a kind and caring person shines out as something I am and not just a front.

    Such situations involve prostitutes, strippers, or a life or death situation.
    Why?
    Well this is the furthest extreme to test to see how genuine you are about being a kind person. e.g. I was walking down a street full of prostitutes. I'm under the impression that NO ONE WANTS TO DO THIS AS A PROFESSION. It's always the circumstances of life that lead to it. Most of the girls that approach me are after my wallet and it shows. Me hating and distrusting people makes it a little more obvious.... maybe a little biased since I'm looking for someone who's trying to cheat me. I'm getting closer to the destination [a bar on that street] and a girl asks me how my days going. I respond honestly and ask how hers is going. She says she's working and is frustrated with work. I ask if she'd like to take a break and have a drink. She sarcastically says "I think I have an hour lunch break to take." I buy her a drink thinking . o O ( I don't know what the fuck she's been through to get to this point but I know it ain't pretty). While we're at the bar we talk and she tells me she likes to draw and shows me a tattoo she drew that's on the back of her neck. She wants to play pool and we play a two games, I teach her how to play a little better. She says the loser has to kiss the winner. I win and she kisses me. Then I let her win, she knows it, and I kiss her. I walk her back to her "work" area. and she asks for my number and wants to hang out during the day when she's "off work". We hang out a few times and I find her a real job and help her get off drugs. This works because a guy has every opportunity to just have sex with her and walk away without giving two shits. So no one will pretend to care like they would with a girl who isn't in that profession. Same with strippers. And the life or death is like that too where a girl is in peril and a guy saves her.

    But, then when it comes to politics and "normal" or average situations. I fuck it up.
    It turns out the phone girl was gay. Oh well. she's still cool and I'm going to hang out with her sometime this week. She knows I'm interested and wants to introduce me to her friends.

    The prostitute wants to hang out with me too. Which I will because she needs someone to help her stay on track and she's a pretty awesome person who had a shitty upbringing with very few people who cared about her.

    Anyway, thanks for the input.
    I guess I just need to go out and see more people who aren't assholes to get a better perspective on life.

    Like earlier today I ran into a few kids skateboarding who were pretty friendly and a couple that was fucking in the park. I ran into the couple and just kept walking, I saw them later somewhere else and they were pretty sheepish. I acted like it was no big deal and they were cool and pretty friendly.

  7. #17
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    I'm glad you seem to have calmed down a little. I hope things will go better for you from now on. Good luck!

  8. #18
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    No, I'm always nice unless I think people are being dicks.
    And I don't tollerate bs very much. LIke shitty vague advice about how to feel. I'll feel how I feel I have great control over that, I don't want to learn how to "man up" or "feel entitled." I want to learn the technical part that breaks down the actions taken and words spoken and why, so I know what to do. Not how to fucking feel.

  9. #19
    SonnyCurtis is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    The actions and words just flow naturally when you have the right Mindset. And a little practice helps.

  10. #20
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    Default Re: RAGE!!!! People make me angry

    Amen!

    That is so true.

    Using "Canned" pick up lines, postures, gestures and flow charts are useless. You'll come off very mechanical and insincere to women.
    Carpe diem!


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