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Unread 07-15-2012, 02:43 AM
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Question 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

Hi, my names RollingStone and a documentary on PUA has just introduced me to this community. It showed how a very awkward guy all of a sudden got comfortable speaking to women. THATS WHAT I WANT TO BE.

Im 28 who has a very good job, and lives in Halifax (West Yorkshire), England.

OBJECTIVE:
To be comfortable speaking to very pretty ladies who are out my league as it stands (Im gonna change this starting today), eventually ending up with a really nice girl at the end of this.

PROBLEMS:
1. TOO NICE:

I dont feel I'm aggressive enough. I let other guys come in and start speaking to the girl I want, and then too nice to do anything. Heck, I'm the guy who'll then proceed to get them a drink, and call a taxi for them both to leave!

2. friend zone:
If I do end up speaking to a girl all night, I'll then ruin it by suggesting we go do something nice the next day - which they say yes to. Cool right? NO! As then I continue talking and suggest we ask our other mates come too. Instantly making it all into a friend thing, and thus cementing myself into the FriendZone.

3. SMALL TOWN:
Not a major issue, but Halifax is a tiny town where I know everyone that's worth knowing. Its very cliquey, and most the people I hang around with are either skint and reluctant to venture anywhere than the local. Or with money but in a relationship.

4. BODY HAIR:
I'm fairly slim, and not in too bad a shape, but I have body hair. Quiet a lot of it, and this makes me feel very self conscious about myself. Being of indian heritage, its black thick hair, so its not something I can just trim with clippers without being noticeable. Im also slim, so the whole hairless thing wont work either, I don't think?

5. MEL!!!!!!
I love this woman - but in the friend zone hard. NOTHING WILL EVER HAPPEN, as she's 9 years older than me (37), and she's married (but he's always away), and has a 3 year old girl who she loves to pieces. With a kid involved, it wouldn't be right, but doesn't mean I cant stop thinking about her. I work all day sat next to her. Talk all day, and then we text all the time. Last month I sent her over 1000 text messages, and she sent me over 1000 text messages!! And its the same every month since December! Its not even me who initiates these text messages all the time, sometimes its me, other times its her. Heck, I've already text her this morning several times, and its 9.30 on a Sunday morning! I cant stop thinking about her, and we sort of flirt time to time on text, and are fairly touchy of recent (or is this all in my head). DAMMIT MEL!!

Any initial advice on the above would be greatly appreciated, especially on LOVELY MEL! (and this horrible friend-zone I'm stuck in with several women!)

Cheers
RollingStone



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Time to man-up and stop waiting for it to fall in... New Member Introductions RollingStone 0 251
99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100... New Member Introductions manunited000 10 954

 
Unread 07-15-2012, 05:09 AM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

Answer to problem one: Reach down between your legs, feel those things you have there. They are your manhood... grab them and step up... be an alpha. Its not difficult to do. If a dude comes in on your target to hit on her politely pull him aside and then tell him to get the fark away. Dont worry about getting into fights, most people arent fighters and will leave. And aggressive is the wrong word. dont be aggressive towards women, be confident and in control. Theres a huge difference.

Problem 2: STOP Talking to them all night if thats what the problem is. That shouldnt be too hard at all. If they initiate the text reply the next day or the next two days. Sure you can mix it up once in a while and text and call immediately but you better be on your game if your going to swing that.

Problem 3: You said it yourself... not a major issue. This can work out better for you. Find a girl you dont know, game her, fark her, and let the word spread as it tends to do so in small towns. (Read everything you can on here to complete this step.)

Problem 4: Dude if you have a sweater vest of body hair, get rid of it. Most women dont want a yetti in their bed. A little chest hair is fine... but groom it man. If your too skinny get on a gym routine, or some sort of work out routine. There are tons of body weight exercises you can do in your home if you dont want to go out to the gym. Take some protein increase your caloric intake a bit and put on some definition. If you can afford it get waxed, or laser hair removal unless this is against your heritage in some way.

Problem 5: The best way to get out of the friend zone is to perform a Freeze Out. I wouldnt recommend this with this MEL character as you work with her and that can do more harm than good. However I also would not try to get with MEL because shes MARRIED. I personally have morals(sort of) and had an ex wife who cheated because I was away in a war zone. So I am biased to the whole pick up of married women.

There I am sure is plenty more information to come and as I come up with more to give to you I will.


Best of luck,
Sinister


 
Unread 07-15-2012, 02:54 PM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

Thanks Sinister,

I tend to agreed, I think I'm just seeing problems when I can do simple things to work my way around them. Motivation and Time I guess are the only two things I need....

....well for the first 4 anyway. Decided to not reply instantly to all her texts, just check my phone, and I have a few texts asking me where I was. Just sent a nice casual reply saying I was "busy".

Also, I must say, some of the articles on here are really really great!


 
Unread 07-16-2012, 03:39 AM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

Time is only midly necessary. Practice is key if your not a natural. And yes your problems are pretty much all very simple to fix you shouldnt have to much trouble fixing it.

Just notice when she starts to fade because that means your not showing enough interest. Trying to get out of the friend zone with MEL is dangerous. The immediate response and what not I was talking about was more for future encounters.

And yes there are great articles on here. You can learn a lot from them.


 
Unread 07-17-2012, 05:07 PM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

So, been rooting round the forum, trying to contribute best I can, and started reading The Game.

I have a super quick problem. So after reading a few articles on here, I thought I would try a little Push Pull / flirty stuff with Mel. It actually seems to work, and she's flirting with me a little more now. However, tonight, I agreed to go to a gig with her best mate. Then she stopped texting me after I told her tonight.

She's told me it annoys her - is this the jealousy play? Think I should try to make it up to her, or be Alpha and let her get over with it.

Also, I know I wont get with her cus she's married, but hey, cant blame a guy for trying right?


 
Unread 07-17-2012, 05:25 PM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

Quote:
Originally Posted by RollingStone View Post
So, been rooting round the forum, trying to contribute best I can, and started reading The Game.

I have a super quick problem. So after reading a few articles on here, I thought I would try a little Push Pull / flirty stuff with Mel. It actually seems to work, and she's flirting with me a little more now. However, tonight, I agreed to go to a gig with her best mate. Then she stopped texting me after I told her tonight.

She's told me it annoys her - is this the jealousy play? Think I should try to make it up to her, or be Alpha and let her get over with it.

Also, I know I wont get with her cus she's married, but hey, cant blame a guy for trying right?
Bro ! she is jealous, and wants "her cake, and eat it too" type situation where she just wants an ego booster from you, or she actually wants to fark your brains out.

So man up, and don't apologise for going out with her friend.


 
Unread 07-18-2012, 12:05 AM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

Thanks Pwonager - just about to set off to work now, so will act all cool and stuff. Wont even mention it, and let her break first.


 
Unread 07-18-2012, 04:25 AM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

With all of this Mel romance in the air, it sounds like you enjoy playing with fire. She's clearly sending you IOIs (the jealousy play especially), and with her husband gone for long periods it makes sense that she might enjoy the male attention. I'm definitely opposed to home-wrecking, especially with kids involved. That being said, based on what you've described I would say that you could easily be at least making out with her within a month with only casually studying The Game and PUA Forums.

Once you move past your oneitis and establish that she's staying in the friend zone, this Mel gal could be an excellent pivot to help you get gals. Tell her that your concerned about your body hair, and she'll have the number for a waxing salon for you before you know it. Tell her that you don't have good taste in style, and you'll probably be out shopping with her for a new wardrobe in a jiffy. Women definitely have better judgement about fashion and grooming than even some of the best PUAs.

How far away is the nearest big town to where you live? Have you posted in the Find a Local Wingman forum yet? Go find ten gals better than Mel and sleep with them all.


 
Unread 07-21-2012, 12:32 AM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

I agree with PUAatmosphere, nothing wrong with having a female friend. friend zone is not that bad, if this woman is that much older then you then she can teach you quite a bit. Guaranteed this Mel girl has a good read on you by now. Women are just good at that, she can probably tell you things about yourself that you had no clue she knew. If you develop a good, honest friendship with her she can be of major help in developing your PUA skills (wardrobe, date ideas, decor of your home/apartment, etc...). Let her know that you are looking to improve your love life and ask her for advice. Since you have good rapport with her, i'd be pretty sure that she would be extremely happy to help you out (would probably make her day). I think this would work for you a whole lot more than trying to seduce her, especially if she's married.

Don't screw up this opportunity for a simple lay with this girl (which may or may not happen). Either way, the reward will be much less than having a good female friend that can give you the inside scoop on things. You can even introduce girls you meet to her as being a friend of yours, then afterwards solicit her feedback on what she thought of the girl. So many ways to utilize a friendship with a cool girl to help you grow as a PUA. (Mystery has female friends such as Tara that help him)

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Hard work equals hard bodied sexy women in your life. Picking up women = putting in the time and effort go get good at it. Most naturals have put in this time and effort without it appearing as time and effort to them!

 
Unread 07-26-2012, 08:16 AM
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Default Re: 99 Problems - oh actually, no, make that 100 Problems....

Not sure how I could've forgotten Tara from the VH1 series. Yeah, I'm agreed with ridah28. You should try to move Mel from an ambiguous romantic interest to solidly in your friend-zone becoming your Tara.

Literally the day after I read this post, I saw an entry from Bill Preston about why taking someone else's gal doesn't work. Basically she'll cheat on you with her ex or at the very least you'll realize once you're together that she's the type that was flirting with another man for six-months.

I'm still working on how to politely move gals from flirtatious friendships to solidly in the friend-zone. When I was starved for a little bit of attention, it was really nice to have the ambiguity of not knowing who liked whom. Now that I have a couple of good options, I don't need the added complexity of them acting flirty with me around my group of friends. Keep us posted RollingStone.


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