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  1. #1
    puajul is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default A newbie - looking to man up and build a

    Hi guys, I finally took the time to make an account here, after lurking on the forums for quite awhile. Like most of you I'm an AFC, looking for ways to fix that though.

    Well, my current situation is such that I don't have many friends, probably because I don't have many interesting experiences and or activities. (was mostly a video gamer, was in an all boys school and had language issues - hence used to be really shy to talk to others). My first intro into PUA was the mystery method by a friend (who casually introduced it to me, he did not use it). I did go through "The Venusian Arts: Revelations" and other stuff, also read some on social circle by love systems and "Magic Bullets" (and daytime dating by Jeremy Soul).

    Well, even though I went through all those, I still never actually tried to start my pickup game, since I always have a poor inner game (due to bad acne, scars and all [tried lots of methods to fix it honestly, all the natural stuff, accutane etc] - and a lack of a good social circle). I am however trying to devise a plan on how to build one, since I'm currently off the boat in Australia. Certain activities that I read would be useful would be stuff like salsa dancing, more outdoorsy stuff and etc, how do I get about to making the first step? I know the goal would be to join as many interesting activities as possible, but being the AFC I currently am, I would find it hard to fake being a cool guy, having a strong social circle while participating in those activities. PUA teachings usually tell us to demonstrate value, how should I go about (or fake)demonstrating value in a new social circle when I'm just starting new on just about everything. Even in those new activities, it would be good to start demonstrating value, by telling cool stories from travelling perhaps?

    I did implement some stuff such as not being overly interested when meeting someone new and some stuff on leaning back, body language; however the issue on not being able to discuss about interesting threads is really pulling me down. (I do realise that one should discuss what is really interesting to one's ownself, but having only reading manga and browsing stuff on xda as my hobbies certainly wouldnt help - I got too comfortable in entertaining myself I suppose)

    Thanks a lot if you actually went through all of that =)

    If it's relevant, I'm a 21 y/o university student in Melbourne. (college game? XD - well most college students have already formed their own cliques so I thought the best way would be to first build a list of interesting activities to help with my inner game)

  2. #2
    ImJake is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A newbie - looking to man up and build a

    Hey, I'm new here too, my introduction would sound very similar to what your saying here hehe. Good luck with becoming a PUA

  3. #3
    Sportovec's Avatar
    Sportovec is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A newbie - looking to man up and build a

    I guess I've always had a few friends but have always had a hard time trying to find some cool new ones.
    An activity I took up a few years ago was Mountain Biking and I know that in Australia you must have some Bike clubs and and sorts...
    Anyway, when I was new all I did was buy a new Bike and ask the guy who sold me it if there were any bike clubs I could tail along with, beginners and stuff... (I was always active but never went Mountain Biking)
    He said that him and a group would meet on the weekends and tour some trails for a few hours and that beginners would go too.
    If you want to take this method and buy a nice Mountain Bike go for it.. Just be sure you buy a bike at a bike store and not a Toy store. Mine is all Aluminum Alloy but now Carbon Fiber isn't as expensive as it used to be. Research on what you want in a bike and snoop around all the bikes you might like.

    At the beginning of This year I started running in races in my town. You only have to buy running shoes and shorts. Train a little around town and you will start to see familiar faces that go to the park at certain times and run. Don't approach during work-out's, only during rests and/or water breaks in the park or where ever you are going to run.
    Durring race days you will most likely see groups of people wearing matching shirts or outfits.. You are going to want to talk to them and ask: "Are you part of a Running Club?"
    then after they answer ask what days, times and where they run, contact info.. If they are not a running group ask if they know any then go talk to the next group of people you see wearing matching outfits..
    I was scared I wouldn't keep up with some of the people I just met but there are a lot out there that were just starting since it was the beginning of the year.

    So start training now and join a running group later. Also, don't be intimidated by the people that are wearing brand new shirts and water belts, arm wormers and new flashy shoes... Real runners wear old sneakers and faded t-shirts, those are the ones that run fast.


    I already started swimming this year so next year I can start participating in races as well.. I'm a Sport and Fitness fanatic but you need to find what you like. Other ideas i can give you that I like to talk about also is Fashion, so you can comment on girls clothes example: "I like your Neon color shirt, thats really going to come into style this Summer" (I'm in Southern Hemisphere too) then say that she has a very nice sense of fashion. Also wear something fashion able and ask her to tell you what she thinks. Take it from there
    Good Luck

  4. #4
    hit626 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: A newbie - looking to man up and build a

    I think that's a good way to go about it.

    The fact that you are joining a club or sharing interests with others shows commonality. This is a very good thing. We are more attracted to someone who shares a common interest or desire.

    I learned this in high school. When those around me mentioned an interest of theirs I shared as much knowledge as I could and they would gravitate towards me (even if my knowledge didn't go that far).

    It definitely works wonders and this way you will make casual conversation and make acquaintances which means you will meet more people.

    So I would say that you just need to make yourself known to those around you by having that commonality that people crave.

  5. #5
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: A newbie - looking to man up and build a

    I have spent the last year dealing with the same kinds of things. My two go-two pieces of advice are:

    #1: Have FUN FUN FUN with this whole deal. It is going to be a challenge, it is going to be rough, and you are going to have setbacks. ENJOY all of your interactions, and try not to doubt yourself. Self-doubt is the mother of screwing yourself over. There is plenty of time to analyze AFTER the night is over.

    #2: If you are not a little uncomfortable and a little scared, you are not living out of your comfort zone, you are not expanding and trying new things. You are doing this because you are trying to crawl out from under your rock and LIVE, so LIVE!
    KISS - Keep it Stupid Simple


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