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  • 1 Post By Bill Preston
  • 1 Post By artandale

Thread: Hello. I need help. And a lot of it.

  1. #1
    SuaveDreamer71 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Hello. I need help. And a lot of it.

    Hello everyone! So I just graduated college (I am 24 y/o) and moved back home with my parents (lame ), but it is what it is. I have always been an introverted individual, but my biggest issue is my "inner game". My self confidence is pretty much nil. I always seem to think that people are judging me or making fun of me, which really fudges everything up.

    I've been told that I am a very good looking guy (by many people), but I struggle to see it. I think this stems from my childhood (I had severe depression and was diagnosed with OCD as a child in middle school). Middle school is when everyone starts to form "cliques" and such. Because of my conditions, I was pretty much exiled all throughout middle school. I went to school through high school with these kids, so it never got any better. I remember a girl I like calling me a "freak", which really hurt things even more.

    College got a little better, but still more of the same. Because of grade school, I had a lot of social anxiety. In college, I was always the quiet one. I even tried greek life, but it didn't help. I've never had a girlfriend, or been in any kind of relationship. Right now, I sit on the couch, watch TV, and drink beer . I don't know ANYONE here anymore and I don't even know where to start. Where do I meet people? Where do I meet girls? Especially during the day?

    Going to a bar/club solo seems weird to me, especially with my social anxiety. I mean, I can talk to people, but its usual "I can't talk to an attractive female, or a group of them". I think the problem is that I can introduce myself, but after that, I DONT KNOW WHAT TO TALK ABOUT. I am always afraid I will blank and then I will look weird. I am a very sociable person. I just need to know people before I can do that.

    I hope I can get some useful help here. I'm tired of being lonely. I will be in this area for at least another 1.5 years, as I am taking some additional classes and studying for the MCAT so I can apply to medical school.

    -Chris

  2. #2
    Bill Preston's Avatar
    Bill Preston is offline Owner - PUA Forum
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    Default Re: Hello. I need help. And a lot of it.

    Hey man.

    Listen there are two things you need to do.

    1. Get active. Whether it's sports, the gym, whatever. Get some friends to hang out with... there are a million things to do - so start doing something.

    2. Learn to tell a story. I would always have a good story to talk about when I first met someone. It can be about the crazy homeless looking person you saw last wednesday at midnight walking down the middle of 2nd avenue with a grocery cart full of bags of trash. Describe how he was holding up traffic and yelling at people or whatever. Explain how you saw him turn down 6th st and push it all into his apartment. Can you imagine being his neighbor?... anyways then say, the CRAZIEST part is, I just saw this same guy in the grocery store before I got here and he was buying food. When he pulled out money from his pocket he literally about about 50 hundred dollar bills all rolled up - and he paid with one of them.

    Then you can riff about what he must do to earn money, or how you are going to start collecting trash or whatever.

    It doesn't matter if it happened a year ago, you can tell the story like it just happened.

  3. #3
    Bill Preston's Avatar
    Bill Preston is offline Owner - PUA Forum
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    Default Re: Hello. I need help. And a lot of it.

    Oh ya, and this is a plug for a product I endorse but you should definitely check this out:

    PUA Forums Presents | Unbreakable

    It's legit.

  4. #4
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    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Hello. I need help. And a lot of it.

    Interesting subject. As i grow older i realize i'm technically in the same boat but i tend to have an extended perspective about what i'm doing with my life. Real good friends in the town i've been living in for the last few months... None. It doesnt bother me because i'm actively pursuing my goals and having fun with it. The game is apart of the development. Oddly enough it started this hear through the idea of taking video games ro a real life scenario. Its not a game perspective of sports and seeing women as throphes but more about a self improvement game. Similar to jane mcgonigal's ted talks about why games can be beneficial to our modern day society.

    I believe its a good start to get with some prinicpals of the tupe of person you want to be. Look for the structured pillars in your job, your hobbies and your interests in regards to women--food, drinks, entertainment. Bill recommended a great few places to start. Chin up. Keep at it
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  5. #5
    SuaveDreamer71 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Hello. I need help. And a lot of it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bill Preston View Post
    Hey man.

    Listen there are two things you need to do.

    1. Get active. Whether it's sports, the gym, whatever. Get some friends to hang out with... there are a million things to do - so start doing something.

    2. Learn to tell a story. I would always have a good story to talk about when I first met someone. It can be about the crazy homeless looking person you saw last wednesday at midnight walking down the middle of 2nd avenue with a grocery cart full of bags of trash. Describe how he was holding up traffic and yelling at people or whatever. Explain how you saw him turn down 6th st and push it all into his apartment. Can you imagine being his neighbor?... anyways then say, the CRAZIEST part is, I just saw this same guy in the grocery store before I got here and he was buying food. When he pulled out money from his pocket he literally about about 50 hundred dollar bills all rolled up - and he paid with one of them.

    Then you can riff about what he must do to earn money, or how you are going to start collecting trash or whatever.

    It doesn't matter if it happened a year ago, you can tell the story like it just happened.
    Sorry, should have specified. I am an active person, as I play and referee hockey. I just haven't been to the gym in a while. I've just been so down and depressed lately that I have just been sitting on the couch doing nothing. I am a pretty fit looking guy, though I am not muscular or built.

    The other problem I have is that I don't know where to FIND women to interact with. I don't like in a place like NYC where it's easy (Hopefully I will be here soon though!). I live in Raleigh, but it's just tough. I can go to the mall (we have a few very upscale ones), but I feel like all I see there are high schoolers and teeny-boppers. It's frustrating!!!!!


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