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Thread: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of me...

  1. #1
    Broken Man is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of me...

    Hi all,

    I met a beautiful Polish woman out of the blue online at the beginning of November 2016. We kept our conversations short and sweet prior to meeting and I went into our first date confident and well-groomed. Not long into the date I was feeling very good about the progress, she looked breath-taking and soon I planted my eyes on her and we kissed with such true passion it practically blew me away.

    We saw each other a lot over a month's time and as stated in the title, I let my emotions get the best of me. I spent too much time without giving her space, said some things that you really don't state in the first month and sometimes let an insecure side show after she told me about a guy or two that expressed interest in her (and she claimed she had no interest in them).

    The final time I saw her was around mid December 2016. After seeing her 3 out of 4 days between Friday and Monday I spoke with her by text that Wednesday. She was getting her furnace replaced that Thursday and told me Wednesday she got little rest the night before because it went out again. I offered to come down and keep her warm Wednesday night and she told me ok but she would be home late around 7pm. I felt all was ok until I arrived. She was distant, a hair cold and maybe 15 minutes after walking in to her place she asked if I would be taking my weights (dumbbells) home the next day (her son was coming home from Europe in a few days and I figured she was asking this in case I wanted to use them since we would not see each other much while he was home). I stayed with her that night, we woke up together, I got ready for work, took my weights, hugged her and told her I would text her later. She said ok.

    We texted a few times over the next two days. I was trying to give a little more space then the next Sunday she texted me stating she did not want to pursue the relationship further. I replied to her text asking her why she was doing this and she just stated there are a number of items about me that bother her, but would not state specifics. I continued to text her more that day (big mistake) trying to get her to talk to me more or even have a phone call but she then blocked me on her phone and Facebook.

    Since then I have cried a bit and felt little desire to do much. Her and I did so many things together in that first month (a road trip, solid sex, workouts, good conversations, etc) and I told a friend I had not felt like this in over 10 years.

    I decided it would be helpful to see a therapist to help me get on track and so far have had one session. I also went on one date with a new girl on New Year's Eve (my ex was back online 5 days after the split). The date was good and I don't regret taking it. Had I not gone on it I felt I would have been in absolute misery that night and weekend. I also am reading a book from Corey Wayne called 'How To Be A 3% Man' that is helping me realize what I did wrong in this last situation and will hopefully improve things going forward.

    To conclude, a part of me would love to get a text sooner or later from me ex but I know the chances are slim.

    My questions are: has anyone been through a similar scenario where they let their emotions get the best of them instead of stepping back and letting her chase you? Also has anyone ever been able to get their ex back that has been through a very similar situation?

    Thanks,
    Broken Man

  2. #2
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    Trickstar is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    If she unblocked you wait another month then add her but dont message her or like any of her posts for another month then after that you can like a new picture she posts (must be recent like it came on your timeline) but do not comment. After probably another month of this send her a funny video, meme or something that you know is funny to her. If she is single and responds properly by saying its funny or something you're in a good direction. DO NOT say anything that indicates interest and keep the conversation short and casual and just keep doing this until she starts trying to make the conversation longer then you can have longer conversations and get flirty again. If she reads the message and doesnt respond wait a couple weeks and try again. After three attempts just give up cause she wont be interested. Worked for me for both exs and new girls I'm gaming. I'm telling you if she reads and doesnt respond multiple times its time to give up.

    Oh and DO NOT post anything alluding to you being depressed or anything. Maybe once and awhile share a meme about sex from a page and see if she responds to it somehow. Also dont make it look like you're having this amazing sexlife if you're not. If you are, actually post pictures of you with your dates or pictures of you out with HOT female friends (ugly platonic friends dont work, hot platonic friends give off the same affect as you actually fucking them cause it will enter the chicks mind).

  3. #3
    Broken Man is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    Thanks for the suggestions, Trickstar. I sent her one text msg a week ago, which was about 10 days following the break-up. I told her I accept her decision but believe a simple conversation would straighten this out (she never told me the reason for the break-up) and to reach out if she changes her mind. I have not received a response so far. So, whether she actually received it or even read it is another story. She has me blocked on Facebook and possibly her phone.

    What I have done is put a new profile pic of me up on Facebook that appears more confident and I added a post showing some work I have done to my home, trying to convey I am active, my 'handyman' skills and being productive. I did go on one date with another lady which was good but hard (because I wished deep-down it was my ex). I took no photos but may see this lady again.

    At this time its about 3 weeks since the break-up. We met on POF originally and I can see her profile showing pics of her by doing a username search and not being logged on. So...it looks like she has not found anyone yet. Part of why I mention this is when she reached out to me on POF she told me shortly after I am the only guy she wants to meet on that site. So...maybe the same could happen again after some time.

  4. #4
    Tyrone1991's Avatar
    Tyrone1991 is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    {At this time its about 3 weeks since the break-up. We met on POF originally and I can see her profile showing pics of her by doing a username search and not being logged on. So...it looks like she has not found anyone yet. Part of why I mention this is when she reached out to me on POF she told me shortly after I am the only guy she wants to meet on that site. So...maybe the same could happen again after some time.}

    Stop! Stalking is Creepy, desperate and AFC as fuck.

    The rule to getting you're ex back is simple.

    No Contact at all from 0-90 days, zero contact. That's how long it can take for a her to miss you. So if you really want her back you'll wait that long.

    Avoid Drinking Alcohol during this period otherwise you may break the silence. If that's not possible, delete her number.

    Keep yourself really busy and show it off on Facebook.

    New pictures in new places with new people.

    Great work on the DIsplay Picture and the handy work. Great work on the dates, keep it up. Post those pics so that bitch knows you are desired by other women, even if she blocked you. People loves gossip, any mutual friends you both have use as messengers without them knowing. If you talk to them only tell them the possitive factors of you're life. Don't let them let her know you're struggling at all.

    join the gym. Post it.
    go on road trip. Post it
    selfie with date. Post it. (Look up social proof)
    having fun. Post it.

    Why?

    1. It displays to her that you arnt emotionally, mentally or physically inhibited without her.

    2. You will attract new and more women (more pictures to post) (most likely meet someone. Enter then your ex)

    3. Keeping busy keeps your mind off her, exercises you're brain, your skills, you're fitness and your experiences. (Which essentially gives you more confidence) (look up inner game)

    4. When you're ex and you finally talk you will have a lot of new stuff to talk about.

    My final tip of advice:

    Have sex with 2-3 other women as a minimum.

    first one you may feel like you cheated and panic but let me reassure by saying if she didn't tell you why she broke up with you and blocked you from seeing her stuff on Facebook and is on POF. She obviously hiding something and clearly she on a dating site. So don't think she is playing Virgin Mary.

    second one you may still reflect back on ex but won't be dramatic.

    third. You won't feel a thing and you're onetitis is cured.

    Do what I say, don't be a chump.
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  5. #5
    Broken Man is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    Tyrone, thank you VERY much for your advice. I definitely don't want to be presumed as a stalker and will keep myself moving forward with being productive, dating and not dwelling on my ex. Its funny you mention I 'may feel like I cheated and panic' if I have sex with another woman. I was contemplating that this week but pointing out that she is potentially hiding something as well is a good thing for me to keep in mind.

  6. #6
    Tyrone1991's Avatar
    Tyrone1991 is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    At the end of the day, it's you're cock, not hers. You have the freedom to do what you want with it. She ain't sitting there like a goblin under a bridge jumping out and stopping all cocks from crossing because only her exs cock can enter. It's a nice fantasy to believe some one still cares enough about you to reserve there vagina for you. But the reality is, we got desire, urges, instincts and needs. Both man and woman. She already trying to satisfy some of hers by being on POF.

    Also you wrote "lost the women of my dreams" but that title alone sounds more like a nightmare. Food for thought.
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  7. #7
    Broken Man is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    I also wanted to mention the very last thing that she texted me on the day of the break-up. She said after I requested talking to her by phone 'there is nothing to talk about' and 'there are things about me that bother her' (which she never specified) and she has 'made her decision'. Sounds pretty definitive but only time will tell...

  8. #8
    Tyrone1991's Avatar
    Tyrone1991 is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    Yeah I can't help you figure out her riddles bro, just focus on the above and you're improvement will out weigh what she said if there actually are things or if she just making broad lies to justify her dumping because she has a different reason or no reason at all.

    Like if my ex ex wouldn't give me an excuse I would of probably started dating her sister and said "there's nothing to talk about and I made my decision"

    But funnily enough, I've never been dumped. I'm basically your ex lol.

    i just realised you're relationship was a month long. Just fuck someone else bro. You got like 3.5 billion women to pick from, and this girl sounds like a fucking tragedy. Honey moon period of relationship is 3 months. She isn't even capable of that. NEXT.
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  9. #9
    Broken Man is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    It was a fantastic situation mostly for the first 3 weeks then the last 4-5 days its like a switch was flicked. I'm sticking to your suggestions, Tyrone. Once again, appreciate your advice.

  10. #10
    Tyrone1991's Avatar
    Tyrone1991 is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Lost woman of my dreams after one month; let emotions get the best of m

    Look I just went no contact for a month on girl who doesn't give a fuck. But 2 days ago, I got a message. We're talking now.
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.


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