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Unread 03-29-2011, 10:31 PM
SeizeTheLay
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Default First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

The first message to a girl on a dating site will determine whether she looks at your profile, replies or just deletes it along with the other dozens of messages she gets every day.

I used to go through a girls profile then try to think of something witty/sarcastic to say then message her, but that'd take so long and online game is about numbers, just like in person.

Common opening messages like "Hey whats going on" won't work unless you have a very solid profile or you have to be damn good looking.

The message I've been having success with is:
“hey, so do you have a job? I need a woman who can support me while I play video games all day.”

Here are some actual responses I got:

Shocked – “haha I hope that’s a joke cuz I got a good laugh out of it.”, ”LOL! you have to be kidding me.”

Qualifying themselves – “Hahahaha does full time student count? lol I’ll be a baller when I graduate tho!” , “I do have a good job, I make $600 in tips a week”

sh1t Test – “i think we’re looking for the same thing…too bad.”

Don't be intimidated by the sh1t tests, I just keep my frame and continue exaggerating or playing along with the story, she just wants to see if you'll buckle under resistance.

Also - be sure to check out this thread on an online dating profile that is just KILLLING it:

http://www.puaforums.com/online-dati...g-wonders.html



Last edited by SeizeTheLay; 03-29-2011 at 11:02 PM.
 
Unread 03-30-2011, 03:11 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

My most successful:

Downtearth? lol Hmm

You can say they almost look like a model or might not be real. That'll get them curious and even a thank you. Another offshoot of that was cocky:

"Girls with the hot pics can be empty. lol If you're not share your warm smile."

The hot ones wrote back in waves. The regular ones were spunky. It was interesting.

Got back tats? lol That's a new one I'm toying with.


 
Unread 04-03-2011, 08:43 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

Quote:
Originally Posted by SeizeTheLay View Post

Sh1t Test – “i think we’re looking for the same thing…too bad.”

Don't be intimidated by the sh1t tests, I just keep my frame and continue exaggerating or playing along with the story, she just wants to see if you'll buckle under resistance.
How did you respond to that shit test?


 
Unread 04-06-2011, 06:35 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

How do you answer if they challenge you. I wrote one teasing her that we couldn't meet because I cant grow a beard and she requires one (made a joke about bias). She challenged me by saying that she doesn't require it and that I am the biased one, but agreed that it was a good reason not to meet.

She was being playful, not telling me off. How should I counter?

EDIT:

I just kept going with another absurd story and the conversation continued.



Last edited by DanBand; 04-06-2011 at 06:59 PM.
 
Unread 04-12-2011, 11:31 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

Hey lady. So now that I've violated my own morals and joined an online dating site, I figured now would be a good time to try and woo you. I promise nothing but pictures of tiffany diamonds and lots of e-roses. Now don't get too excited, I mean I know your head over heals in-love with idea. Theres the stent of my witty streak for the night. So yea how do you end these things? A simple, Hmu, Facebook style? Nah we'll go with the classy, ttyl
-john

-this one has worked a couple times for me. sorry to threadjack man!


 
Unread 07-21-2011, 01:24 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

Seizethelay, thanks for that contribution, it seems like a good go to:

It's been kind of hard trying to develop an opener with a good hook and that pretty much does it (although, if they don't 'get' the joke would that be a show of low value by lack of wealth?).

I gave this a shot on match and got a Sh1t Test response in like 5 minutes:

"Are you smokin somethin cuz that aint how it goes im a independent woman but do not support anyone ut my son and especially if they play video games all day long?"
(Obviously, she was not too keen on spelling or grammar....)

Now, I'm very new to all this. I feel like I have a strong natural game in certain areas (I'm 24 and my count is 22, so not terrible), but after reading I've definitely realized the many things I had NO IDEA were going on.

Anyway, a couple weeks ago that reply may as well have read "F*** OFF!!", but now I know what it really means is "Are you Alpha?"

Now, I've read that agree and amplify is a pretty good tactic for sh1t tests, but I'm not sure it directly applies here.... I am wondering how I should approach this particular test.
I know that I should keep my cool and keep playing, but should I:

1. let her know I'm just kidding (I'm guessing that would be kind of beta of me?), 2.should I neg her ("Wow, you're pretty but you have NO sense of humor, huh?"), or 3.should I just keep pushing and, if so, when should I turn that around?

The forum's thoughts would be greatly appreciated, I could care less about the result here (girl was one of like 8 I picked to see how they would react to this opener)


 
Unread 07-21-2011, 04:59 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

My vote would be option#3, by default. Option #1 as you say is beta. I've negged some girls as an opener and AFC'd responsed with a "SORRY" and would always never hear from them again. Option #2 is dangerous. My general advice is to never neg when online dating. Therefore, deafault is option #3. Just act like nothing bothers you at all.


 
Unread 07-21-2011, 06:54 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

i sort of agree with pokerbaby but here is how i see your situation professorx... option 1 blows... option 3 is safe.. but if you go with option 2 and dhv yourself and she doesnt get it then f'her anyways she isnt cool enough to talk to... but if she does get it then run with it and see what happens... its online dating there will be more girls and ask yourself this... do you want a girl who will make you take the safe route and try to walk all over you or do you want a girl who knows you are the alpha and will respond in that manner... i would also def add a smiley maybe a wink or a big grin face and the end of option 2 if thats what you go with


 
Unread 07-21-2011, 07:15 PM
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Default Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

Guys, thanks for the feedback.
Unfortunately, I was kind of impetuous to pick a move (this is one of my first times in actual practice). I didn't really care about the outcome, but I went ahead with option 3. I didn't do this to avoid option 2's confrontation, but just to see if continuing without making any clarification that I'm joking would turn her around... and it did ; )
That said, I wasn't even CONSIDERING your points on DHVing Wildcard. I am glad you shared the perspective and will be SURE to use option 2 on the next shit-test response I get.

In case your wondering it played out like this:

I responded
"Oh! I get it.... You're like an ex-video game junkie and you probably can't be around someone who, despite being dashing, will probably lead you into "THE LIFE". I should've known it was impossible from the start! Damn these dating sites and their false promises...."

I get back:
are you crazy??? Lol ..I like video games lol, but won't support a man I believe its mutual..."

I read that this way:
LOLs: My Bitch Shield is down.
I like video games: I am qualifying myself to you.
The rest: I can't think of a constructive interpretation, so I won't think of it at all.

Let me know if you have a different perspective!
I'm gonna let her simmer for a day and then respond...

I think I'll retain the joke and say something along the lines of:
Whaaaat, no support?? Man, you're pretty, but that's so stingy... I dunno. Okay, Okay.... tell you what, you can buy me a beer and we'll call it even.

That way I'll quell that sneaking suspicion that I might MAYBE actually not be joking and just be a crazy person (which is a legitimate risk when online dating) and I'll have asked for something in return (Alpha's don't do anything for nothing, or so I've read).

Would love your thoughts.


 
Unread 12-30-2011, 10:16 PM
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Smile Re: First message to send to a girl that almost always gets replies

What i found that works well is staring off by asking "do you work at "dominos" (any pizza company?)"
Than she will reply with something like "no?" or "no. why"
when she says this you put "well the lady that delivered my pizza last night looked just like you"
Than im sure your man enough to take it from there but this should really start a fun conversation and gives you alot of places to take it.A funny reply is "she spoke Chinese" and she will probably laugh at that.


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