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Unread 10-29-2011, 10:55 AM
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Default when she suddenly stops responding?

okay first off, sorry for long thread, it should be a pretty quick read though. i just need some interpretation because im terrible with online dating. some quick background info about the girl. shes 18 (im 21) she didnt really write too much on her profile but she seems like an innocent girl and she has a few pictures, shes a very pretty asian girl. so heres how it went down:

me: hello there yenjx! so ive thought about this for a second and thought to myself... do i want to be mr funny and try and make you laugh right off the bat? hardy har har. nahh, that would come off as too goofy. so should i be mr ric suave and try to woo you to death? i dont think so, i would come off as too serious. so because this whole online thing is decided within the first few lines... i think ill stick to the classics and just say hello!

her: LOL all that for a hello, damn i'm special

me: lol hmm i wouldnt make such a conclusion, you havent proven just how awesome you are yet :P so halloween is approaching quickly, what are you dressing up as?

her: LOL haha you'll see I have no idea yet How about you?

me: lol no idea yet?! youre running out of time... im dressing up as ash ketchum (main character from pokemon lol) you know what you can do, dress as up pickachu! wed win all the costume prizes duhh

her: LOL!! I know i know, but i dont know what i'm going to do haha that would be pretty amazing, I would be the best
pikachu out there

me: yeah you would be, especially considering ive never seen
anyone do it before :P havent you gotten facebook event
invites galore for halloween? theres always something to do
on halloween lol. so are we going to exchange names or just
stay completely mysterious?

her: LOL yeah but those things arent really my "scene" haha
what's wrong with mystery?

me: ou ahh, nothing wrong with a little mystery, an enigma if you will so what would you say is more of your scene?

her: I'm not really a party hard, get drunk, crunk, sloppy mess kind of girl, i like to have a party with my friends and have fun with them, nothing over the top, quite simple

me: ahh so youre an innocent one, could this be due to the fact that youre still 18?

her: LOL noo i don't think so, I tried doing that.. it wasnt
what i liked

me: reasonable enough! so dont be alarmed or anything but i
have this hidden talent to be able to tell what sort of
oriental asian people are so im going to have to say you
are....... chinese! right or wrong?!

her: hahaha 1/4

me: lol looks like weve got a cross breed, at least i got one right so far, now lets go for 2... korean?! right or wrong?

her: wrong!

me: :O im usually right! youre just going to have to tell me, before i guess wrong again lol

her: haha one more guess!

me: oh i can see someone really likes this game haha...
alright, lets see here. after observing your photos the
judge has come to a unanimous decision of.... japanese!
right or wrong?!

her: wrong ! haha vietnamese

me: vietnamese, really? now its either the lighting in your
pictures make your skin look lighter OR your parents
deprived you of sunlight as a child :P so because youre so
into this game, can you guess what my background is?

ps no cheating, you cant read my profile lol

her: LOOOL! I think it was the fact that i pratically live in my basement. Ahh too bad I already did

me: oh we have a cheater! thats gonna cost you :P and you say you practically live your basement...? thats it... youve
convinced me, we are gonna have to go out on an epic
adventure together in attempt to take over the world! do
you think you can handle it?

her:Of course I can, who do you think I am?

me: ahhh i dont know who you are, you see thats part of the
process.. getting to know each other, need to make sure
that the partner in crime is legit lol

her: It was a hypothetical question silly!

me: lol i knew that! so would ms pikachu (im calling you
pikachu cause we are yet to exchange names, and yes you can
refer to me as ash ketchum lol) be free for monday night?

her: i have a class at 430 unfortunately

me: lol not that early silly! i have work at that time also!
what time is good for you?

and thats where it ends, she never replied... she seems like a fun girl, i wanted to take her out, get to know her better. so any advice? i thought i was doing so well... any way to message her again and get a reply? thanks guys

ps i hope everyone is enjoy this halloween weekend!



Last edited by keepurcool; 10-29-2011 at 03:58 PM.

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Unread 10-30-2011, 06:32 PM
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Default Re: suddenly stops responding?

bumping


 
Unread 12-25-2011, 01:31 PM
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Default Re: suddenly stops responding?

i don't know man i'm kinda a newbie, but i know for a fact that some girls go on these websites with no intention to meeting any of the guys on it. they use it to boost their self esteem. to me sounds like it went well to me.


 
Unread 12-30-2011, 02:33 AM
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Default Re: when she suddenly stops responding?

Quote:
Originally Posted by dchen19 View Post
some quick background info about the girl. shes 18 (im 21) she didnt really write too much on her profile but she seems like an innocent girl and she has a few pictures, shes a very pretty asian girl. so heres how it went down:

me: hello there yenjx! so ive thought about this for a second and thought to myself... do i want to be mr funny and try and make you laugh right off the bat? hardy har har. nahh, that would come off as too goofy. so should i be mr ric suave and try to woo you to death? i dont think so, i would come off as too serious. so because this whole online thing is decided within the first few lines... i think ill stick to the classics and just say hello!

her: LOL all that for a hello, damn i'm special
1. "innocent" is great. If she seems that way, you can tease her about that. Ask yourself: what stereotypes come to mind when you think about that word?

- she's afraid to pick up a phone
- she was told never to talk to strangers
- she's a virgin and has unrealistic expectations of courtship
- she's gullible and easy to tease
- she's a player. she's a devil. the whole "innocent" demeanor is a trap to sucker unsuspecting guys.
- she's never had sex.
- she's immature and childish.
- she lives in an ivory tower.
- she has a bad sense of directions.

2. Too much investment from you for a simple opener. Find a way to say the exact same thing with fewer words.

3. Cute. She thinks she's special. My Princess Radar's going haywire over here....

Quote:
me: lol hmm i wouldnt make such a conclusion, you havent proven just how awesome you are yet :P so halloween is approaching quickly, what are you dressing up as?

her: LOL haha you'll see I have no idea yet How about you?

me: lol no idea yet?! youre running out of time... im dressing up as ash ketchum (main character from pokemon lol) you know what you can do, dress as up pickachu! wed win all the costume prizes duhh

her: LOL!! I know i know, but i dont know what i'm going to do haha that would be pretty amazing, I would be the best
pikachu out there

me: yeah you would be, especially considering ive never seen
anyone do it before :P havent you gotten facebook event
invites galore for halloween? theres always something to do
on halloween lol. so are we going to exchange names or just
stay completely mysterious?

her: LOL yeah but those things arent really my "scene" haha
what's wrong with mystery?
I notice she doesn't exchange names with you. Good for plowing on though. Odd, since you seem to have a degree of attraction. She IS qualifying you and investing.

Quote:
me: ou ahh, nothing wrong with a little mystery, an enigma if you will so what would you say is more of your scene?

her: I'm not really a party hard, get drunk, crunk, sloppy mess kind of girl, i like to have a party with my friends and have fun with them, nothing over the top, quite simple

me: ahh so youre an innocent one, could this be due to the fact that youre still 18?

her: LOL noo i don't think so, I tried doing that.. it wasnt
what i liked

me: reasonable enough! so dont be alarmed or anything but i
have this hidden talent to be able to tell what sort of
oriental asian people are so im going to have to say you
are....... chinese! right or wrong?!
Lol? You should have teased her on being innocent and qualified her further. She's qualifying herself on what she isn't... but you still know nothing about her. I'm getting the impression she likes being challenged.

Everyone probably thinks she's sweet and innocent.

Quote:
her: hahaha 1/4

me: lol looks like weve got a cross breed, at least i got one right so far, now lets go for 2... korean?! right or wrong?

her: wrong!

me: :O im usually right! youre just going to have to tell me, before i guess wrong again lol

her: haha one more guess!

me: oh i can see someone really likes this game haha...
alright, lets see here. after observing your photos the
judge has come to a unanimous decision of.... japanese!
right or wrong?!

her: wrong ! haha vietnamese

me: vietnamese, really? now its either the lighting in your
pictures make your skin look lighter OR your parents
deprived you of sunlight as a child :P so because youre so
into this game, can you guess what my background is?

ps no cheating, you cant read my profile lol

her: LOOOL! I think it was the fact that i pratically live in my basement. Ahh too bad I already did

me: oh we have a cheater! thats gonna cost you :P and you say you practically live your basement...? thats it... youve
convinced me, we are gonna have to go out on an epic
adventure together in attempt to take over the world! do
you think you can handle it?

her:Of course I can, who do you think I am?

me: ahhh i dont know who you are, you see thats part of the
process.. getting to know each other, need to make sure
that the partner in crime is legit lol

her: It was a hypothetical question silly!

me: lol i knew that! so would ms pikachu (im calling you
pikachu cause we are yet to exchange names, and yes you can
refer to me as ash ketchum lol) be free for monday night?

her: i have a class at 430 unfortunately
1. That transition to nationality-guessing really stood out to me.

2. Good try on the close.

3. The close failed because you didn't have enough attraction. Again, my hunch is that you could have challenged her more, teased her about being innocent, and dug deeper on her vague answers.

4. You can accuse her of being afraid of phones, strangers, socially awkward, etc.

5. Your sticking point seems to be attraction-qualification. Read up. And go work on that.

Quote:
me: lol not that early silly! i have work at that time also! what time is good for you?
Good stuff following up. She wasn't attracted enough to give you her contact info though. Read what I said above.


 
Unread 02-14-2012, 11:36 PM
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Default Re: when she suddenly stops responding?

Shill was spot on with his comment on your opener. It set the whole tone for the conversation, with you as her entertainer not the best start.


There are a lot of things I would have done different. For one, I am always trying to convey that I am the prize... a pretty basic frame that works universally.

I would open up with a qualifier. My profiles pretty solid so I assume HV. If she asks why you messaged her or she immediately takes a HV frame, the best disqualifier is to tell her the site matched you to her but you think she's too much of a "good girl" for you. (or whatever, the site matching phrase is the important part). At worst this puts you on even ground.

I would not exchange more then 5 or 6 messages before getting the game moved to a phone or chat. A good rule of thumb is to do it in as few messages as possible. No one wants to write a novel like you did and come away with nothing. It's frustrating and a waste of my time.


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