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  1. #1
    Pluto87 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    So this girl messaged me on POF a couple weeks ago and we got to chatting. She's not only drop dead gorgeous but she is smart and witty. Anyways, we exchanged some messages and I finally asked for her number. We texted a bit here and there and she sent me a random text on Fat Tuesday saying how she was looking forward to meeting me because she just hasn't been interested in any of the guys she's been hit on or whatever so far.

    She lives an hour away and just recently moved here a couple months ago. From what I understand, she moved out here because of her then boyfriend, but they broke up shortly afterward because he cheated on her. So she's just recently single and I'm a little afraid I might be a rebound.

    Anyways, I drove up last night and took her out to dinner and then we went bowling. We had a great time and clicked on a level I had never really been on before. When I was driving her back to her place she was saying how I should come up next weekend, I told her that I have drill but I would have definitely come up otherwise, so she said then the weekend after and I obviously agreed. So we get to her place and I think she wanted me to kiss her because she paused for a second, looked over, and I was just too chicken shit to make a move (plus it's really awkward since I drive a truck and the center console is huge). She left and I made the mistake of texting her 5 minutes later saying how she should give me a call today since she'll be in my area looking for a new car; I was trying to imply we should hang out. She never responded and I'm hoping I didn't blow it.

    I was going to text her tomorrow to ask her how the car search went.

    Thoughts? Advice?

  2. #2
    MyScreennameRocks is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    When I text a girl and she doesn't reply, I am loathe to send another text. Every time I've gone against my gut and done it anyway I've wished I hadn't.

    I'm a pure novice but it seems like when you send a text(s) when she hasn't replied it gives her the upper hand, lowers your value and makes you seem needy/clingy.

    Experienced PUA's feel free to correct me if I'm wrong but I believe I nailed it.

  3. #3
    Pluto87 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    Yeah, I texted her before you posted your messaged asking about her car. Conversation was going fine with nothing to indicate she wasn't interested. I finally get to the point where I asked if she wanted to hang out again since we can't hang out this weekend. No response. I'm just dumbfounded. I got an insane amount of ioi's on our date. I think it's ridiculous that I could have screwed it up in the minute that I dropped her off, because everything was damn near perfect up until that point.

    I'll probably text her sometime next week asking when I'll be able to check out her new vdub (she got a Jetta). If that fails then oh well.

  4. #4
    Pluto87 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    Turns out she met some guy from work and just didn't want to tell me about it, so every time I got around to asking her to hang out in a conversation, she'd just ignore me, so I decided to just ask what the deal was and she told me.

    But I just want to say one thing, this is a forum for people to come and ask for advice, and I got ONE response. Pretty lame if you ask me.

  5. #5
    don pimpin sheezy's Avatar
    don pimpin sheezy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Pluto87 View Post
    She lives an hour away and just recently moved here a couple months ago. From what I understand, she moved out here because of her then boyfriend, but they broke up shortly afterward because he cheated on her. So she's just recently single and I'm a little afraid I might be a rebound.
    You can't control whether you're a rebound or not so don't worry about that sh1t. The relationship'll last as long as it's going to.

    Quote Originally Posted by Pluto87 View Post
    Anyways, I drove up last night and took her out to dinner and then we went bowling. We had a great time and clicked on a level I had never really been on before. When I was driving her back to her place she was saying how I should come up next weekend, I told her that I have drill but I would have definitely come up otherwise, so she said then the weekend after and I obviously agreed. So we get to her place and I think she wanted me to kiss her because she paused for a second, looked over, and I was just too chicken sh1t to make a move (plus it's really awkward since I drive a truck and the center console is huge). She left and I made the mistake of texting her 5 minutes later saying how she should give me a call today since she'll be in my area looking for a new car; I was trying to imply we should hang out. She never responded and I'm hoping I didn't blow it.

    I was going to text her tomorrow to ask her how the car search went.

    Thoughts? Advice?
    I think you should have made out with this girl and tried to move things onto her place and maybe even gotten laid. She seemed really into you and you never made a move. That may have scared her off (and made her cancel her tentative plans with you for the following weekend). Chicks don't like being around guys that don't take the initiative.

    As far as texting, a good rule of thumb is to not text a girl more than twice if she doesn't reply back. If she doesn't respond that day, big deal, just wait another day.

    As far as asking a girl to hangout I'd get more specific. Tell her when you're next day off is and that you want to see her.

  6. #6
    Pluto87 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    I agree with making out, but I liked her a lot and respected her so I wasn't even thinking about trying to get laid. Yeah I might have blown it to a degree because I didn't make a move right there, but if that's all it took for her to lose interest, then she's not worth it anyways.

    I didn't text her more than twice in a day, I always waited. I was totally thrown off by her because she seemed really interested, then everything went to sh1t in like a day or two. She works at a bar and was working the next night (Saturday), so I'm just assuming that her coworker pretty much just asked her out that night.

    I've got a weird work schedule since I'm pretty much working part time for the guard flying so I don't always know when I'll be going in to work. But that's a moot point because I'm pretty positive she was already hanging out with this guy right after I took her out.

  7. #7
    don pimpin sheezy's Avatar
    don pimpin sheezy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Pluto87 View Post
    I agree with making out, but I liked her a lot and respected her so I wasn't even thinking about trying to get laid.
    Respect's got nothing to do with it. You respect her barriers, while continually trying again to get physical again and again until you get physical or she gets scared off.

    Other considerations are if she or you have some religious objections to premarital sex. Honestly most of the chicks that I went on to see for an extended period of time I did so with women that I got physical with on the first night (making out, blow job, sex). Trying to get physical with a girl real fast helps weed out the girls that aren't really attracted to me and are on the fence.

    Quote Originally Posted by Pluto87 View Post
    Yeah I might have blown it to a degree because I didn't make a move right there, but if that's all it took for her to lose interest, then she's not worth it anyways.
    Very true.
    Quote Originally Posted by Pluto87 View Post
    I've got a weird work schedule since I'm pretty much working part time for the guard flying so I don't always know when I'll be going in to work. But that's a moot point because I'm pretty positive she was already hanging out with this guy right after I took her out.
    Work schedule doesn't matter. If a girl's into you enough she'll work with it.

  8. #8
    Pluto87 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    Quote Originally Posted by don pimpin sheezy View Post
    Respect's got nothing to do with it. You respect her barriers, while continually trying again to get physical again and again until you get physical or she gets scared off.

    Work schedule doesn't matter. If a girl's into you enough she'll work with it.
    I guess what I mean is that I had absolutely no intention of getting it on, just something I don't really do on a legit first date.

    You were saying how I should tell her when my next day off is, and I was telling you that I can't really say for sure about something like that unless it's the weekend, and in my situation, the weekend wasn't available.

  9. #9
    don pimpin sheezy's Avatar
    don pimpin sheezy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Took a girl out I met online, need some no BS opinions/advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Pluto87 View Post
    I guess what I mean is that I had absolutely no intention of getting it on, just something I don't really do on a legit first date.
    Yeah, because you're obviously scared to. You couldn't even muster the courage to kiss her. I know hallmark cards and romantic movies would like you to believe that no one gets laid that fast but they do. My younger brother's married and he had sex with her on the first date. You don't have to but you can. Especially if you feel that there's passion between you go for it. If you don't go for it you may be just trying to hang on to the illusion that she may be into you when she's really not.
    Quote Originally Posted by Pluto87 View Post
    You were saying how I should tell her when my next day off is, and I was telling you that I can't really say for sure about something like that unless it's the weekend, and in my situation, the weekend wasn't available.
    Then tell the women you date about your schedule. Try setting things up for the weekends you know you'll be off and even try setting something the day of if you find you've got an evening off that day.


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