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  1. #11
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    I have a saying: 'if you're afraid of losing something, then you've already lost it'. Oneitis and neediness kill attraction, and you're being superoneitis and superneedy right now. Basically, if you're going to skip work (worth 2k, WTF) just to see her you're going to kill the relationship with your bare hands.

    She initially got attracted to you because you pretended she was a fat girl you didn't care about - now you're thinking of doing extreme things because you can't stop thinking about her. You're doing the opposite now and the result will be the opposite, too.

    Stop thinking about her, just do your work, and when you're back home hang out with her. Keep texting to a minimum unless you're good at it and have read decent material on it so you can do what whitedragon suggested, because it can be a one-way ticket to the friend zone.

  2. #12
    Jookkeee is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    I like how you pay attention, and read closely all I said.
    Still the point here isnt her knowing Im going home PRIMARY for her, Im never gonna tell her that ofcourse..I have small buisness to attend to, too, and I will use that as my primary reason for her!
    Just right now, I said she could join me on a convoy. But I'm taking the second day off, she said "You really think I would pick drinking before you?" her attitude is messed up, her feelings is, I DONT know what she wants, but Im in most important phace her, it's too early to Freeze Out, or letting time get by after my opinion

  3. #13
    Jookkeee is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    I mean, this is the time were I set the theme, set the ground. And I still see the chance in that, But I dont see it, if im not sacrificing something, thats one of the most important rules of PuA, to gain something u always have to sacrifice something

  4. #14
    PitchWhite11 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    I have fallen for situations like this before and from my personal experience...you are out of your mind for losing out on $2,000 dollars of work to rush home to this girl. For all you know she's banging 4 guys three ways from Sunday but SHE KNOWS she has you hooked already!!!

    She needs you to go to the doctor with her? Really? That is bs on her part. She doesn't need anyone to go with her. She obviously is not a big girl and is looking to hook you into being her "care giver" "bank account" what ever word you want to use.

    Dude I am telling you this because I have dated girls like this and lost out on valuable time and money. I also did learn from my experiences so to say "Don't do what your doing" is actually wrong of me because you must learn one way or another. Regardless you will do what you want because that's how humans work. All I am saying is that in my opinion this girl is BAD NEWS and you need to do what Virgil said. Continue working and you will see her when you see her. If she really does like you than when you get back she will make an effort to see you but as it looks...she KNOWS she's slowly hooking you and will take everything you have including your heart.

    Keep posting and I'll do my best to offer help but again...I'm 25 years old and this girl screams NO GOOD to me. You are better than that man. You deserve a good girl and she is also 18...what 18 year old honestly wants to settle down? Just relationship dynamics man.

    GOOD LUCK
    -P!tchWh!te

  5. #15
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    The point is not that you don't tell her - but the fact that you do. You're putting all kinds of important stuff aside for a woman you've just met. And then you're going to tell her you're not back just for her. Don't lie to women, bro. That is also one of the most important rules of PUA (BTW where did you get that you need to sacrifice something to gain something? 'Cause that's not true.)

    In the end it's all your decision, but I think you're best off looking up all information about texting, sexting and building sexual Tension over text you can find. Then apply it, try to build some kind of sextext relationship until you get back. From there on in, it should be easy.

    And like PitchWhite11 said, no 18-year-old party animal wants to settle down into a long term relationship.

  6. #16
    Jookkeee is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    Thanx guys, I really appreciate your help!

    But, the doctor is free here, she wants me to comfort her at the doctor, since it might be an life threatening decision, of all peoples, her familiy etc, she picks me, that has to mean something? So far she bought more stuffs for me than I did for her :<

  7. #17
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Jookkeee View Post
    Thanx guys, I really appreciate your help!

    But, the doctor is free here, she wants me to comfort her at the doctor, since it might be an life threatening decision, of all peoples, her familiy etc, she picks me, that has to mean something? So far she bought more stuffs for me than I did for her :<
    It's good if a woman does more for you than you do for her because it means she's chasing you and you are in control of the relationship.

    You've only known her for such a short time, I doubt it's something life threatening. If it is, she would have picked her closest family. I think this girl really has you in her grasp if you can't see that.

  8. #18
    Jookkeee is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    Screw it, I'm doing the easy way, building our realtionship up thru her best friend..Make her like me alot, then that will automaticly transfeer to my girl

  9. #19
    PitchWhite11 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    Let me know what happens man.

    Remember...ultimatel y you have to take care of yourself! Don't sacrifice YOU for anyone else because when the walls come down...you're left standing on your own and you need a strong base of SELF to support you.
    -P!tchWh!te

  10. #20
    Jookkeee is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I went to far! Need advice

    Hey guys! Thank you for being patience!
    I've done some serious changes now!
    First, I read through the replies again, and I can asure you my friends, money is not involved in this picture, I have many reasons for that, first, I live in a small town, around 16k peoples, I know alot of them, If a person would do such a thing, she would get thrown out and hated instantly, no one would risk that. Second I dont like to share the reasons but, her kidneys are failing, something bad happned when she was a baby, and they are failing so bad now, that she has to do a surgery, this doctor appointment will tell her when this surgery is, here is were she picked me to join I'm sure of this guys! Maby my way of speaking zoomed in on this, sorry for that.

    So for what I did...
    I started with her best friend, Talked alot, I even talked to her before I talked to my woman, we talked deep and fun things, because I could use my mind while talking to her. After some days I built up alot of trust, agreed to her points of view, her sides of each story etc...Now she started telling me about her life, feelings etc..And Im a pretty good listener, So after that, to feel her comfortable to, I told her about my "problem" with my woman..But I told her not to tell her, because that would make me sound weak.
    Now, the reason I told her that is because, her best friend will always tell her all the things, So i Knew she would know that I talked about her, to her best friend..If you guys understand...So, I prepared a letter, explaining it all...Then I waited.. Now the reason I prepared a letter is, because every girl in that situation would get mad at a boy if he told her friend, and not the woman herself...So, when she typed, It sucks, you didnt tell me first..
    I INSTANTLY added the letter of almost one page to her..
    Explaining it to her..Now this made her open up the conversation to me and not the oposite, she replied farking good back btw!
    She told me a lot too, As I said^^
    Now, I started going cold, when she had to start initiate, this started up to make her work more, and Im still speaking with her best friend pretty much..
    This girl aint a normal girl..She is strange in many ways, I mean, it isnt many girl saying "Everyday, We do whatever you want to do" Anw, this seems to be working, and Im just going colder and colder, but still talk when Im needed too.

    Now my plan is...She is in a sh1tty mood, because of the doctor appointment, and how everyone is trying to comfort her around that subject, and she hates talking about it...
    Ok, so here is my plan, please tell me what you think of it!

    I told her "I need a code, from my chip inside my apartment, It is in my room, I need you on standby for this, since this is my future, and I need that code to continue my education, that is why I need you to promise me, to run as hell and get it once I call you, even if ur at work" She said Yes, I promise. Now, I call her...I ask her, were are you? she says, Im at the door. Me: Well, just go in, I need that Code now, btw hon, I got a message today that I might be another week at the sea, Sorry for this..And I have something to talk to you about later on too, just so you are prepared for it. THIS Will bring her down, her mood will be so low, her spirit will be so low, this will probably be one of the worst days for her. Now, she enters my house villa!
    She says "I smell barbeque on the...(Dont know what it is called, that small platforme were you barbeque on a house)
    I say : Sorry, forgot to mention, my sister is having a barbeque, could you tell her that I'd be an additional week on the sea? Her: Sure, she walks out..She sees 2 spots, dimmed light, A rose and her favorite food, the sun is shining and her favourite music, she looks around trying to grasp it all, then she gets 2 hands around her wriste from behind, turns around and sees me.

    Now I brought her completely down, then then brought her to the top! THIS haz to work! I can't imagine it going any other way...Can you?


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