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  1. #1
    Mister Andrew is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Dating Logistics

    I haven't been on a date since college (a little over two years ago now) and things are a bit different now that I live in a different area, and I am confused about logistics.

    I went to college in Berkeley so logistics were pretty simple because everything was in reasonable walking distance. I would walk to a cafe, a girl could meet me there, and if things went well, neither of our places would be too much of a walk away.

    Now I live in San Diego, where the driving distances are potentially longer than the walking distances I experienced in college. For a first date, would it make sense if both parties drove their own cars to a location? Or would that complicate things if we did want to go back somewhere? Or would that be interpreted as a "just friends" kind of thing?

    Or, for the purposes of seduction, should I make it a point to pick a girl up in my own car on a first date even if it means a 30 minute drive? I'm wondering if that might reflect too much investment or something.

    Hate to sound ignorant, but this is still a little new to me. What should the logistics be like under these circumstances?

    EDIT: Oh, and perhaps the most important thing... I currently live with my parents because of the financial realities of the times as well as my chosen career path. I understand that this could be a very big obstacle, but I imagine that it shouldn't be insurmountable. Short of moving into my own place (which will happen eventually but not immediately), how could I best deal with this?

  2. #2
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Dating Logistics

    Just take things step by step. If you're meeting someone for a first date, meet somewhere that is easy for you both and it's no problem if you each walk back to your respective cars (but be a gentlemen and walk her to her car first if you are interested in her). A first date is, at least in my experience, about getting to know the person and building attraction. I rarely kiss on a first date except for maybe a quick kiss goodnight. If the girl likes you she will not be thinking about logistics. She will be emotionally charged. Nothing in your situation is a problem and in fact much of it can be used as opportunities. Be creative.

    Second date you can then invest in more time and seduction - i.e. driving 30 min (which is nothing really) because if a girl will date you a second time she is almost guaranteed to like you and take things further. In that case you can pick her up and go wherever you like. I would also quite happily drive 30 min for a first date if I had good vibes the girl was interested in me and she was cute. I wouldn't drive 2 hours, but 30mins is nothing. To be a good 'provider' you have to invest something into a girl, they expect it and most times it will add value to you rather than take it away as being needy. Once you're at the point of being intimate with kissing etc she will likely help out with suggestions on where to go (she's not a manequin) or she might even like the risky business of sex in public places or in the car somewhere random. That's what young people do. If a women is horny she won't need a bed, she will do it anywhere. There will surely be times your parents or hers are away or if you have privacy in your room, you bring her home. I remember when I was at university my mum said something about not bringing girls home overnight but when I got a girlfriend I would bring her over all the time. I ignored my parents haha. Your parents might not like you bringing home one night stands all the time but they should be flexible when it comes to a nice girlfriend or LTR. Don't think too far ahead, just enjoy each phase of dating and the logistics will work themselves out. Sometimes the more you try plan it, the harder it is. Go with the flow and have fun.

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