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  1. #1
    Forthedream is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Need a quick expert opinion on girl I am dating for 3 months

    I've been dating this girl for 3 month but we have only seen each other 10-15 times total because I was leaving the country many times. Every day we spent together till the end. I've gotten a makeout on the 3rd date, she actually jumped me herself just a few seconds before I was gonna go for it.
    She is a really attractive and nice girl, all of her gfs are HB's and they all say the same thing - there hasn't ever been a guy who could get her until me, not even get a kiss from her.
    The problem is that she is in relationship with her first bf for 7 years now and she is extremely loyal. She won't have sex with me until she breaks up (because she will hate herself and me otherwise).
    We did almost have sex twice, I promised we wouldn't and took her to my room. After a bit fooling around and kissing, it started to get more and more intense I gave her an orgasm without having intercourse, but she won't let me in no matter how aroused she is. But 2nd time, it was suppose to be our last date because even though she is in love with me, she doesn't want to keep me waiting because she can't break up with her bf. Anyway, it didn't go very far, I tried doing takeaways but she doesn't take it very well and starts crying because she is expecting that I'm gonna leave forever when I do it. This time it wasn't a Takeaway, we broke up, she cried a lot but after a few texts and 2 hour long call we decided to give it another go, now that I'm staying for at least a few month and not days.

    She is afraid of being with me alone unless I promise that we won't have sex because we will for sure if I don't.

    Is this still doable? She has the qualities I've been looking for in a girl and I know I shouldn't have fallen for her before having sex but its too late now and wouldn't have mattered anyway. I think giving it more time might help me, but it might just make the next break up even harder.

  2. #2
    rs5096's Avatar
    rs5096 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion.

    Yeah - all the qualities I look for in a chick too - a chick that won't fuck me coz she has a boyfriend.

  3. #3
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion.

    Lol even though rs5096 has a rough charm to him, he has a valid point. I never think it's a good quality for a woman to fool around on a guy no matter how AFC he is. She is used to "replacing" men when she isn't getting what she wants. (And I don't take a woman getting fingered and licked as extremely loyal) She's getting her cake and eating it to, as they say. It's possible you are suffering from one-itis and as you know this is dangerous territory. My advice is to take a few steps back from her, talk to some other women to get your head cleared, then come back to it and see how you feel then.

  4. #4
    Forthedream is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion.

    Yeah you guys are right, it is one itis. The thing is I'm in too deep, she is in love with me but she is a chicken. I've never had a girl after getting so aroused still saying no, the thing is that nobody was ever able to pick her up, I'm not boasting, its just that I can see how hard it is for her. she cried for days after we broke up.
    She never flaked, last time she had a yearly review to do but I asked her to elope with me and she did which almost got her fired. She is working with millionairs every day yet she likes a broke guy like me. Maybe I'm fooling myself, set me straight guys. I'm giving it a month before I LJBF her, all her gfs are HB9 and 10s so I will keep her as a female wing and as a friend she never betraid me she was more loyal than many of my best friends put together -, its hard to let her go. My cold approach skills are weak but once I get in, I'm strong so all girls i get are through social circles which makes it hard to get her jealous and she is afraid to bring her gfs to me because she thinks I'm really good which I'm not. I'm gonna try to get her jealous by going after her hottest friend but she gets approached so much its not even funny, I dont think its above my ability its just that I'm not really interested in her.

  5. #5
    pwonager is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion.

    How can you break up with her, if she already has a boyfriend? LOL

    Also she wont have sex with you because of the boyfriend ! double LOL

  6. #6
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    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion.

    rs5096 and pwonager, this is a troll-free forum and I'd like to keep it that way. If you disagree with someone, just tell him so without being sarcastic, please. Posts such as these do not help the guy or his confidence. Thanks.

    Forthedream, you've got to wonder if this is a girl who you'd like to be with. Like BatMan said, this girl hooks up with another guy - while in a SEVEN year relationship, man.

    If you want her, you've got to act like it doesn't matter either way whether she wants to be with you or not and show that by flirting with other women.

    If you don't want her, you've got to move on and start flirting with other women.

    See the point?

    First go out there for a week and talk to as many women as you can, while mostly cutting contact with her. Make contact like an alpha male showing disinterest - wait for her to do so first and when she does, be brief and reply late - or not at all.

    After a week decide whether or not you want to go on with her. If you do, the cutting contact will have a beneficial effect because you've shown her that you don't need her, which is attractive to women. If you don't want to go on with her, contact has already lessened and it's an easier transition.

    Then, after that week, if you still want her, well...... (let's have an expert that can deal with the boyfriend issue fill this in, please).

  7. #7
    Forthedream is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion on girl I am dating for 3 months

    We had twice that we didn't see each other for weeks because I was away in a different country. She knows that I can walk away, thats why she cried so much. I did my best not to be needy and she does know I can get a girl quickly if I really wanted to. But I'm not gonna contact her anymore, I texted her best friend to give me some more insight, that might clear my head.
    I don't like easy girls and she is the hardest I've ever had, thats why I like her so much. She knows its still cheating but she doesn't let me go all the way, its hard to find a girl like that nowadays but its a matter of opinion I guess.

  8. #8
    Bumac is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion on girl I am dating for 3 months

    Hey man,

    First I should mention that I totally get why you are interested in her because she is "hard to get" I actually made the mistake of going after one myself just because people told me it was impossible to get her to go out on a date. The problem is that once you reach whatever milestone "no one else could do" you've either invested a ton of time and energy (and likely developed a bit of an attachment) or will find youself super confused about what to do since you only had the goal in mind and no plan for after.

    With that said, what IS your plan after you close the deal? Do you actually want to date a woman who is cheating on her first boyfriend? I can tell you from experience that there are types of girls who are unhappy in their relationship, have a hard time ending the relationship and tend to get in trouble by finding a replacement before letting the first guy go.

    So IF you are in the Mindset of making her your girlfriend she needs to show you that she wants the same thing, not just by giving it up, but by being YOUR girlfriend, otherwise you are sleeping with someone who is boinking someone else when she isn't with you.

    As you may be able to tell, I also suggest leaving this one and going out to cure yourself of your obsession with this girl...but if you must actually be with her it is important that she doesn't have a boyfriend anymore, and that isn't something you do for her, it is something she does for you. I still say bounce out of this situation. Believe the cliche, there are TONS of women out there and while you've put this one on a pedestal for being "pure" the fact of the matter is that she is cheating on someone else with you, therefore not as good as you'd like to believe.

    Short version: I suggest leaving her and either playing the field or finding one without a BF. If you must be with her it has to be a matter of you or him. There is no good to come of being the second guy, no matter how she is trying to represent how important you are.

    Good luck with this!

    P.S. Don't let the crying fool you, not to woman bash, but they cry a lot...it often doesn't mean what we think it does.

    P.P.S. Good game on getting her into you, but she doesn't love you after 10-15 times seeing each other. At the moment she is looking to fill something she isn't getting elsewhere and it's not sex.

  9. #9
    Forthedream is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion on girl I am dating for 3 months

    I didn't have milestones in mind and I didn't feel like I hit a brick wall until she said she is too attached to her bf that she cannot leave. I've had girls cheat on their bfs in 20 minutes so I did get attached but not for that reason, she has very limited time and since she is spending it all with me she doesn't have time to date other guys and if she wanted to she wouldn't need me. With what little time she has, she always comes through something even my best friends fail to do. Ever since starting the game I lost a lot of respect for girls and guys on trust so if she would be as loyal to me, that would be good enough. I've seen a lot of crying and I know when its real so yeah.

    But what you are saying about her using me concious or not is true, thats what I felt a bit recently. I could have had sex with her if I wanted to but I didn't push it, although thinking back I should have. I have already made the decision to drop it for now at least, gonna take a step back and rethink everything.

    Thanks, you understand the situation pretty well.

  10. #10
    Bumac is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Need a quick expert opinion on girl I am dating for 3 months

    Sounds like you are getting things pretty well under control. Good luck bro!


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