Hello everyone! I got into the online dating game about a month and a half ago and have had a good amount of success. So, I figured I'd share with you what I have done. Feel free to take any tips, techniques, or critique my methods. Just for reference, I've found the most success on okcupid. I have a profile on Zoosk and PoF as well, but don't like them as much. On Zoosk, since you pay for more than one message, you can move to texting pretty quick but it's harder to turn it into an in person meeting in my opinion. As for PoF, I just have not found success and can't put my finger as to why. Regardless, I have the same things written on each profile.
First, have your profile fully filled out. BUT DO NOT have too much written. Girls read your profile but not if it's too wordy. I have two short paragraphs written. The first is just a little about my current life (where I go to school and what for, what I like to do in my free time, music, movies, etc.). The second is about my goals in life. Since all sites have different things for the rest of the sections, I'll just give a quick tip that I've found works. Keep everything short. One sentence is ideal, two sentences MAXIMUM. This stuff is just so others can see what you have in common. For the most part, people just glance through it, not really reading it.
Second, make sure you have multiple pictures of yourself. Just one picture is not going to cut it for these girls. I'd suggest at least one that is a picture of just you and another with you and friends, out, having a good time. Build your social proof through your pictures.
Third, so now that you have your profile, message everyone you have the slightest interest in. Just as in going to the bar, this is all about numbers. If you only message five girls, you might get a response but there's a pretty good chance you won't. If you message 100, you're almost guaranteed to get a response.
Fourth, time to make your message be the one she'll respond to. Based on what girls have told me, they can get hundreds of messages a day (I met up with a girl I had met on OkC last night, she told me that she had gotten over 200 messages the first day. I didn't believe her, but she showed me, and it was true!). So how do you make yourself the one she responds to? Straight Indirect Game. Here's some tips:
1. NEVER tell her she is cute, attractive, beautiful, hott, anything. Do not compliment her about anything. I have only had one girl respond when I gave a compliment and she was boring, I quickly lost interest. It doesn't matter what else you say in your message. If you compliment her, chances are she's not going to respond.
2. Read her ENTIRE profile (no matter how long it is) and ask her something about something she mentioned. I've found it best to mention something between 1/2 and 3/4 down her about me. Mentioning something from the beginning could mean to her you just read a few lines. Something from the end could mean the same. Something from the middle means you read it all, which is something girls love.
3. Move to the phone quickly. I'll typically move to the phone in about 15 messages. This allows you to talk more and secure a date faster, which is something I've found very important which leads me to...
4. Set up a date as fast as you can. I've found that the best way to do this is build the comfort quickly then turn things sexual. Start with an innocent sex question. "Do you like sex?" Obviously, the answer is yes. But you are not saying that you want to sleep with her. However, you both know that's what you're getting at, but she only realizes this subconsciously. She'll be more willing to meet you.
5. Make sure that you set up the date within a week of you starting to talk (when the date takes place should be within a week, not you asking her). The only girls that I have been able to secure a date with, it happened within a week of us talking. There have been others that were more than a week, but they all have flaked.
Follow these steps and hopefully you'll find success as I have!
Feel free to critique any part of this. I'm always open to learning and improving my game, so any tips are welcomed!