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Thread: Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

  1. #1
    BOX3R is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

    Hi guys, I'm new to this.

    Just wondering if the rules to Instant Messaging are any different to Texting?

    How do you open? I it weird to start straight off with "Hey there :P" or will that seem weird if you haven't had any recent encounter with the girl?

    Also how would you structure the conversation?

    Any advice would be great.

    Thanks, Trentender

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

    I personally treat all forms of e-communication the same way. Meaning: YES.

    You can (and SHOULD) keep the same Mindset with IM's / emails/ texting.

    Because the more emotional responses you can get, the more effective your message is going to be.



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    Default Re: Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

    I agree with tmalonetn in that all types of communication that is digital can be categorized under the same amount of rules.

    On another note, however, if youre opening a girl with instant message that you haven't met before you'll want to make sure you don't come off as creepy. In my personal experience opening an IM with a direct approach ("hey, I thought you were cute blah blah blah") hasn't been the best but maybe you'll have better success. With texting you have a bit more freedom because some sort of relationship was established when you got the Number Close but just don't over-do it. Work your game and play by the rules.

    Good luck, hope that helps!!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

    I do NOT treat all digital communication the same... Email, text, IM or messages are all different for me thus I communicate differently on them slightly. If your new to this all, then just pretend they are all the same and don't worry.. but later you will notice the differences and start to improve on them differently.

    I build TONS of online relationships with girls I have never even met before. Just random add on facebook, to convo, to build rapport to attraction, then they are in love and we never even met once.

    The first thing to notice is that IM is LIVE and *most* TEXT is not LIVE. There is a time period difference between the read's and replies.

    So when your on IM, you can treat it almost like live talking. You can use lots of jokes, negs, openers that you would use in real live because your most likely going to get instant feedback. This I assume your on messenger, skype, or facebook chat....

    But TEXT's are usually disconnected by time gaps and not the same. So I won't leave too many things opened ended waiting for a response.. Lot more statements and closed ended sentences with questions.


    Now for live IM chat...
    Sometimes I will use a opening "blah blah blah looked cute, wanted to say hi, hey there" I personally DO NOT think this even matters.. Lots of times I will open with something weird "randomly found you" "im your newest stalker" "you were suggested to me, must be fate" But I will never dwell on that fact unless she repsonds exceptionally positive to it or excessively negative.. which is rare (less than 10%)
    The real key is to ignore the fact that you don't know her.. and try your best not to ask her anything about herself like its a interview. The best relationships are formed when you jump right in and pretend that you are friends already. I usually find a common interest and just start talking like she is my best friend for the past 6 months.... That way they get pulled into your friendliness conversation and enjoy your company.

    So personally for you (Trentender):
    1. treat all of it the same for now
    2. open with anything, it does not matter..
    3. dont make it a interview, don't ask her a million questions
    4.jump right into a topic that she is responsive with , pretend she is your old friend and just
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    Default Re: Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

    Mobile - how do i get a topic to jump straight into? just do the usual "so have you been doing anything interesting recently"; "yeah blah blah" "oh yeah i like blah blah"?

    Cheers for all the advice guys greatly appreciated

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

    Quote Originally Posted by Trentender View Post
    Mobile - how do i get a topic to jump straight into? just do the usual "so have you been doing anything interesting recently"; "yeah blah blah" "oh yeah i like blah blah"?

    Cheers for all the advice guys greatly appreciated
    "so have you been doing anything interesting recently" << she will go Zzzzz (snore) and prob fall asleep...

    pretend she is your friend already.... like u have known her for some time..

    [open]: "hey, i saw you have blonde hair.. cool! ".. "i love a girl with good teeth, dentures are soo awkward " ..."ur smile is similar to mine, are you adopted too?" "radom add..who cres"

    stalk her profile for the most recent thing that she did...
    [conversation] OMG u checked in a mcD? I always see people taking pics of their french fries like wtf... wait, i hope i didnt offend you.. do you do that too?

    [conversation] been a long week, just got back from the doctor, but he says my implants are doing great. Hows your liver doing? :P

    [conversation] Just went out to vietnamese food, was awesome! but I think I offended the waitress... AGAIN! lolz

    [conversation] finished washing ALL my tshirts... who said you have to separate reds and whites anyways.. i love PINK!


    point is.. i dont care about her name, location, what she is doing, how she is doing.. im just going to jump into a topic and talk and pull her into my life like we have always been friends...
    Helpful? "LIKE" my post + "THANKS" me...
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  7. #7
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    Default Re: Are the Rules for Instant Messaging the same as Texting?

    Cheers mobile; greatly appreciated


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