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  1. #1
    carwhisperer is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default First Date went awesome then she flaked on 2nd

    I took out this 21 yo girl last night. She seemed fascinated with me the whole time. We played pool and had a couple drinks. I bought her a rose, which I realize is controversial. On the drive home she was smelling it over and over and when I took her up to the house. I didn't kiss her. Earlier in the evening she asked what we would do on our 2nd date. I playfully said "So you're assuming there will be a 2nd date?" But then we went on to make plans for the next day which was tonight. I texted her a couple times today and didn't hear back until it was past the time we were supposed to meet. I texted "no hard feelings" and then I hung out with another girl for the evening. I would really like to go out with her again. Any advice on my next move? I'm thinking don't contact her for at least a couple days but then what?

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: First Date went awesome then she flaked on 2nd

    You totally gave away your "power" by letting her off the hook with the "No hard feelings" text.

    I would have called her out for it, but in a semi-funny way; Just in case she had a LEGIT reason. (car accident/family emergency etc...)

    "Hey Flake-face, what happened? holla back & lemme know you're OK"

    This way, you still maintain the frame of being in control, but also showing you're understanding when necessary.

    She'll respect you for calling her out, and appreciate that you did it with class. This also makes a 2nd flake a lot less likely.

    So, there's a little helpful tip for future reference, should the situation arise again.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
    carwhisperer is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: First Date went awesome then she flaked on 2nd

    THanks for the tip but I think she is a little too fragile to handle that sort of response. Also, doesn't it sound a little whiny?

    Anyway, do you have any advice for my next contact? I'm thinking I'll either call her or drop by in a couple days.

  4. #4
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: First Date went awesome then she flaked on 2nd

    The only advice I can honestly give you, is the same that I already did.

    You got stood up.... and then basically told her from the text you sent, "Oh, it's ok. I don't mind. I don't want to hurt your feelings, so I'll just let you waste my time, because it's not valuable to me..."

    Obviously she's not that fragile... She had the balls to flake without any contact before or after.

    Trust me.... sending the "flake-face" text is not harsh at all. But it DOES send a message that what she did wasn't cool, & you don't appreciate it. Yet while still showing respect & offering her a chance to own up to her error. (Even though she disrespected you...)

    Beyond that, I got nothin else I can offer that would help.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  5. #5
    carwhisperer is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: First Date went awesome then she flaked on 2nd

    Allright man I get what you're saying.


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