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  1. #1
    random120020 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default I REALLY like this girl but I'm not sure she feels the same...

    So i met this girl about 3 weeks ago and i REALLY like her. We are almost carbon copies of each other. From hobbies, interests, education, upbringing, music, movies, humor, values, beliefs, etc. A few years back i made this silly list of characteristics of my theoretical "perfect girl". I made the list mainly for fun but i told myself that if i ever met this girl that i would make sure i dont let her go. Today i remembered the list and took it out and this girl has 43/45 characteristics. Its not even like shes a knockout as my friends have said her physical beauty is "ok" or "average" but i could care less as i find her stunning! We ended up hanging out yesterday for what was suppose to just be a laid back evening with some other friends but they cancelled and it ended up just being us two. It ended up being a date almost. we went to her house, had a few drinks, watched a movie then went out for dinner for which i insisted to pay for since she had bought the drinks. we both had a great time and she said "our other friends missed out".

    Now to the bad part. I dont know what to do as there are a few problems. 1) shes 22 and im 21. i know girls usually like to date older men. 2) i don't know if she feels the same about me. she may just see me as a potentially great friend. She isnt your typical girly-girl so im having a hard time reading her. 3) we actually work together at my school :/ its not a serious or strict job though. Im there part time temporarily and she's there only until she starts grad school in a year or two.

    what should i do??? If you need more details please ask!

  2. #2
    Artorias is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I REALLY like this girl but I'm not sure she feels the same...

    One I think it's too unhealthy for someone to make a list of characteristics for their potential partner. Simply because it can be broken and ruined so easily, not to mention oneitis gets a hold of you.

    But anyway let's start off with this, stop thinking about the age this will only hinder you. I'm 19, I'm dating a girl who's currently 20 turning 21. It doesn't matter, all that matters is that you be Alpha but with your personality! Second of all, stop trying to get in to her head, stop caring that much it's not good for you and your approach upon her. You can care, but in my opinion only a little so that you can calibrate.

    Now let's get this out of the way, tell us about her? Do you have her number? etc...

    Oh and that list that you made, get a lighter and burn it. Like right now, burn that list and never wright it again. In my opinion it's good to be picky, but that's far far too picky.

  3. #3
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: I REALLY like this girl but I'm not sure she feels the same...

    Its great that you found someone that special. Its rare indeed. There are a few catches though. Such as the existence of a list. It's good to have standards (actually it should be a must), but 45 characteristics are a bit much. Limit it to under 10.

    Even though you have standards and have met someone that meets that there is the feeling like "holy shit I better not screw this up" which is a dangerous Mindset since you risk being approval seeking.

    Now that's out of the way, the next step....

    Increase your flirting with her. Use attraction methods so she starts seeing you as a potential partner. Then when you get enough IOIs you can be a little more comfortable showing your interest in her. Make sure to qualify her and use SOIs (statements of interest) after qualifying.

    This biggest thing you have you worry about is trying not to screw up. She will eventually get upset with you about something and you will get upset with her as well. No way around it. So just accept it as part of the deal. If you don't you are likely to try so hard NOT to get her upset it will come across as needy and desperate. So just relax and realize you both are going to screw up and that's ok and that it shouldn't be grounds to not try a relationship if it comes to that. Hope this helps and good luck.

  4. #4
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    Yogi B is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I REALLY like this girl but I'm not sure she feels the same...

    Burn the list. If you can, you're one step closer to being a PUA, with some strong inner game.

    I know for males it is often the case that they feel more attracted to females with the same hobbies/ interests. Females simply do not care about this that much as we do. This can be used before you physically escalate with her: tell her you really like her as a person/ like athletic/ cultured/ well groomed girls. This will often cancel out LMR.

    Work on your inner game. This is the most important aspect of sarging. You can have all the routines you want, but if you aren't at peace with yourself/ comfortable/ relaxed, sarging is less fun and more difficult.

    As for the age part, yesterday I picked up a 28 year HB9.5, I'm 21. Stop worrying about stuff, just relax and see where things lead you!


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