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  1. #1
    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default handling text sh1t test- advice?

    Whats the best way to handle a sh1t text over text:

    Just texted a girl: "heyy. I was just thinking how much i wish you were over here right now..... to make me something to eat and do my dishes ;-p"

    She responded "haha yea no" the i said simply "lol. How are you?" And she followed with "......thats not funny" the finally me "jk around!" and now nothing else. And nothing from her. I find this kind of unusual from this girl, shes usually really flirty.

    Where do i proceed from here? Such as whats my next text? I have a date with her thurs that she suggested yesterday, but i need to solidify plans....real soon.

    Whats my next move? And let this be a lesson for all of us on how to handle these tests in general.

  2. #2
    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    So basically i need to re-engage this girl into a convo quick, without looking like a pussy or ticking her off more. And this is real time so responses are appreciated!

    Was thinking between:

    -hope you didnt think i was serious before. What u up to? (Hidden appology, re-engaging question)
    -what ya up to? (Ignoring her comment and moving on with question)
    -so hows hour night (again like above, ignoring and changing the subject)
    - did you really think i was serious before, lol (teasing, turning it on her, might piss her off?)
    -so about your thursday night date idea, i like it. Drinks by my place? (Ignore, go straight into the date convo she started last night.)

  3. #3
    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    Any advice guys! I feellike i really screwed up on this one...

    I sent her "hows your night?" Just trying to change the subject, and no response for an hour now.

    She seems to have taken it wrong, so im really tempted to send one last text saying "btw, hope you didnt think i was being serious with that cooking text earlier" or "btw, hope you didnt think i was serious with that text earlier! You can cook, but ill do the dishes "

    Or am i just doing more damage by sending something like this? Help please guys, want to recover from this one!

  4. #4
    warlord is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    Don't bring it up again. Wait a couple of days then re engage.

    Texted your self in to a corner. I've done this before but I've learned to not do it any more.

    I personally think cocky/funny is a bad way to text/game/sarge in the beginning stages of the interaction.

    Most REALLY HOT and CONFIDENT girls will shut down most cocky attitudes quick. Unless you are super rich, super handsome, have super verbal game or she is just straight up in love with you.... you will lose.

    Nobody likes having people talk sh1t to them, even in a joking matter. Do you like it when your friends talk trash to you? I don't. Yeah i laugh along cause that's what friends do but i don't "like" it.

    I think Confident/funny > cocky/funny every time. Just my opinion

  5. #5
    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by warlord View Post
    Don't bring it up again. Wait a couple of days then re engage.

    Texted your self in to a corner. I've done this before but I've learned to not do it any more.

    I personally think cocky/funny is a bad way to text/game/sarge in the beginning stages of the interaction.

    Most REALLY HOT and CONFIDENT girls will shut down most cocky attitudes quick. Unless you are super rich, super handsome, have super verbal game or she is just straight up in love with you.... you will lose.

    Nobody likes having people talk sh1t to them, even in a joking matter. Do you like it when your friends talk trash to you? I don't. Yeah i laugh along cause that's what friends do but i don't "like" it.

    I think Confident/funny > cocky/funny every time. Just my opinion
    Ya, from experience as well, I'm agreeing with you here. I know its always said to be interesting and cocky funny with your texts, and they do work sometimes, but with the hottest girls (like this one) sometimes they don't take it the right way or like you say.... you lose.

    In this case, I left it for a few hours, and they sent a slight appology text at like 11pm (she might have been in bed) that I'm starting to regret. This was on the advice of a good female friend of mine.

    Basically said "btw, I want to appologize for the text earlier. I can tell you didn't like it.. I was kidding. Anyways, have a good night. Dont let the bed bugs bite "

    Think I dropped the ball on sending this text out, and listening to my friend? The thing that sucks is that if I don't hear from her, I'll need to try to contact her again about our "plans" for tomorrow night...

    Help please!

  6. #6
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    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    I've gone overboard a few times & the text wasn't received well....

    So my "go-to reply" is usually something like:

    "Oh, you did NOT take that seriously right? Tell me you DO still have a sense of humor... even IF my jokes suck. "

    Or

    "I know... and I already signed up to take REAL comedy classes next week, so enjoy my suck-bombs while you still can. "

    Basically it's an "alomst apology".. but it acknowledges the fact that you realize you've gone a bit overboard.

    If all else fails, this approach usually helps smooth out the roughness:

    "Sorry about that. My bad! I got a bit carried away there... You just make me have too much fun! "

    Then switch to another topic & continue.


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  7. #7
    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    Thanks T-Mal, those are some good ideas to keep in mind.

    So whats your take on my message that I sent out late last night? ("btw, I want to appologize for the text earlier. I can tell you didn't like it.. I was kidding. Anyways, have a good night. Dont let the bed bugs bite " )

    I know it probably wasn't the best. I guess I was just trying to change the tone back to something "cute" or positive.

    What's your opinion? and be honest..

    Also, I need to contact her again soon (like tonight) if I don't hear from her today to see if about our plan to hang out tomorrow.. I was thinking if I don't hear from her, later around 7pm or so I'd call, and leave a VM for a change just saying I was calling to talk about tomorrow.. then leave it at that. Idk!

  8. #8
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    It's never a beta move to apologize when you're wrong, or when you genuinely feel sorry for doing/saying something. And acknowledging the fact that you know she probably wasn't thrilled with the previous message was a smart move.

    But, you probably could have worded it a bit differently so that you don't come off sounding needy.

    I don't think it was a nail in the coffin though.

    I would treat today as a new day & re-initiate with a light friendly text, just to gauge her response... but calling her later is a good move too.

    Don't ask "are we still on?" Because that gives her an automatic out, for free....
    Instead express The Vibe that you still assume & expect the plans to be on as scheduled.

    And you can also use callback humor to make light of that "iffy" text, by saying something like, "blah blah blah..... and tell ya what; I'll cook for YOU & do YOUR dishes sometime.

    It shows confidence & responsibility, as well as your ability to remain calm & cool, even when you screw up.
    (After all, we're ALL human!! so we're gonna make mistakes along the way.)

    Don't assume that everything is blown out just cause you make a comment that goes a little too far.

    A girl will forgive you for being a man & doing that occasionally... but she won't forgive you for being a total wuss-bag.

    Don't be afraid of being bold... just keep learning calibration & timing. That's the key.



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  9. #9
    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    Ok cool. Again, thanks for jumping in whenever these text questions come up T-Mal. I really appreciate it. Although at times I feel like I'm GREAT at texting, other times I get into a situation like this and I feel lost. I'm sure most of us can all relate!

    I also know that a weakness of mine is tending to let a particular girl under my skin to much.... I put to much weight on the interaction.... and then when something goes wrong its a big comedown. This is usually with the 9-10's. I F-closed another girl this past wknd (see my post about my friends younger sister lol), and she's cool, and very cute, but I don't feel so worked up about that one. I'm in the drivers seat, if I want to hang out with her, she's made it clear to me that she will, but dosn't seem that the pressure is there. Whereas this one I feel like she's a little more in control, and I need to reframe and conquer this.

    So anyways.... just as we've been speaking here, the girl I've been worried about just texted me back..

    "Hi"

    I guess its still on haha. Gonna wait a bit to respond back... (hour or two?), and keep the conversation more traditional today, and move toward setting up the date plans for tomorrow. Don't need to throw any more wrenches in there!

    Suggestions?

  10. #10
    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: handling text sh1t test- advice?

    Ok, update on the situation.

    So since my previous post, she texted me and we were having a light general conversation back and forth for awhile. I got to the point of asking her about our plans tomorrow night:

    M: Hey so we still need to figure out plans for tomorrow. You want to just come down by me again for some drinks like we planned last time?
    H: Ill try and make it
    M: Ha, well i want to make some plans we can stick to..
    H: Well work asked if I can stay late tomorrow
    M: Tell em' you cant, u have a date with this awesome guy.. lol
    (gave it a bit then decided to try and call her)
    H: U called lol
    M: Yup, just was driving home for lunch, thought id give ya a call for a change
    H: I was in the shower
    M: Ohh. Call me back, lol
    H: Now I'm at school!
    M: Excuses excuses. Must be a short trip between the shower and school...
    M: I'm just messing with you. Have fun at skewl!

    And have left it. I like to post some of these exact text convo's so you guys can analyze it and provide feedback. So please do!

    This is more of the same from this girl. A few days ago SHE asked me to hang out thursday, now she sounds flaky about the plans again. Kind of pisses me off.

    How to proceed?


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