We have seen them all.. the annoying posts on facebook that make you shake your head in disappointment. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, check out the following list and make sure you’re not one of these people.
1. Posting vague comments.
“I hate guys…”
“People these days…”
“I hate my life.”
This is just a lame desperate cry for attention… I sometimes wonder if people realize how stupid they look. Posting something like “Doctors appointment today, hope the test results are okay.” Then someone will ask “What’s wrong?” and they will ignore the comments or be like “It’s private, I don’t want to talk about it on facebook.”
2. Announcing that you will be deleting your account for good.
“I’m going to delete my facebook forever!”
Another sad cry for attention, some people just love to have others beg them to keep their profile. Even if you do delete your account, common… we all know damn well, that you’ll be back in a few days posting more annoying crap… you’re not fooling anyone.
3. Posting overly dramatic comments.
“Yes! Best news E-V-E-R!!!”
“Uggghhhh! I can’t believe it!”
“OMG I’m so excited!”
I can already imagine you sitting at your computer just waiting for the comments to flood in asking “Why?”. I hate to break it to you, but the suspense isn’t killing anyone… stop trying to provoke some kind of reaction from people.
4. Posting songs you’re listening to.
This is no different then driving around with your windows down and the speakers blasting. Advertising your crappy taste in music isn’t going to impress anyone.
5. Not posting at all, just trolling around.
These people are very incognito… they spy around on facebook like mini secret agents. You know they have been on your page when you talk to them in person and they mention something you posted recently. Otherwise you would have never known they were on facebook, just lurking in the shadows…
6. Begging for sympathy.
“I could really use a drink right about now…”
“Not a good day today.”
“I need something to cheer me up.”
Yet another plea for attention… These people hope that someone will reach out to them with concern, because after all, no one has friends or family to talk to… only facebook friends.
7. Posting news everyone already knows about!
“(insert celebrity name) is dead!”
These people get a hype from rushing to be the first to deliver breaking news. Believe me you weren’t the first, there was already 10 other town messengers just before you.
8. Chronicling every part of your day.
“Just woke up.”
“Just got out of bed.”
“On my way to work, ughhh.”
“Bored at work…”
“Watching (insert crappy tv show) and eating ice cream.”
“I just farted.”
“Going to sleep, goodnight everyone!”
No one cares to read about a persons boring life. I seriously can’t understand why someone would think “I’m gunna eat a snack, oh wait! I should post that!”
9. Checking in to lame places.
It’s cool if you check in to places I would like to visit like Disneyland, the moon, an undiscovered island… But why the need to check into places like In-N-Out, the DMV and Starbucks? Am I supposed to be impressed?
10. Being a sports commentator.
“Touchdown!” “Home Run” “Goal!”
“Let’s go (insert team)!”
“3 – 0 Yeah Baby!”
Sometimes I go on facebook and am like “What the hell? Did I accidentally type in ESPN.com?” No one cares about what’s going on during the game, and if anyone does they are probably watching it already.
11. Trying not to be obvious when your obviously bragging.
“I’m wearing a ponytail in sweats, just woke up from a nap and guys are still hitting on me at the store. I’m like really?”
Getting hit on by the homeless doesn’t count. Just because you were so surprised you got hit on, doesn’t mean you should post every few times it happens. If you really have it going on, you wouldn’t need to brag.
12. Being a weather forecaster.
Oh crap, really? Dam I wasn’t sure if that was rain or snow, thank you for clarifying that for me. Save that line for your next awkward conversation about the weather.
13. Indirect complaints about other people.
“If you don’t have anything nice to say, please shut up!”
“You’re a jerk! I hope you realize that what goes around, comes around…”
“You should learn to stay out of peoples business!”
These people wish they had the guts to say things to people’s face’s, so they post it on their status for everyone to read EXCEPT that one person.
14. Posting random quotes, song lyrics, or music videos.
Dude, common.. just stop. Seriously…
15. Late night posting.
“Ahhh can’t sleep!”
“It’s 1am and I’m still up!”
“Getting sleepy, off to bed. Goodnight everyone!”
Oh thanks for letting me know! I was sitting here all night waiting for your next post, but now I can comfortably go to bed!