Here's my story:
I'm 25, and met this girl online. We went out on about 2 months ago for the first time and the date went perfect, she enjoyed herself, she was easy to get along with and as I walked her back to her train, she asked if she could come over to my place. Of course we did, and as I'm closing the deal, her top is off and I start going down on her, she says she really wants to, but asks "don't you think it would be better if we just waited? I really like you and I just want to feel like I have a little self respect." I thought for a few seconds, realized I like this girl as a girlfriend type as well and decided to hold back from sex for better sex in the future and possibly a girlfriend.
So we see each other the next weekend, the date was great, we had good chemistry again, hard to out do the first date as far as initial attraction goes, but she invited me back to her parents place (she's 25) because they were out of town. We go, we chill for a while and have a lot of fun with each other. I get her to her room, and start closing the deal again, but this time she tells me "it's not that she I don't like it, or I don't like you, I really like you, but I got out of a 4 year relationship in May" She goes on and tells me how the guy really did her in on the breakup and was a faggot, changed his address and number because his mom told him too, yadi yadi. Anyways, I tell her I think I'm going to leave, and she holds me back and tells me she really likes spending time with me and wants me to stay over, but just no sex. So I stay over she sleeps on me that night and wake up make breakfast, and I leave.
So two weeks go by without seeing each other because of a natural disaster (sandy), we text but there is only so much you can do and say on a text, eventually you need to see the person ad you don't want to spoil the fire with simple bland texts. But what are you gonna do here? So we set up a third date, she changed the original Saturday to a sunday date because she got drunk on friday and was hungover. Seemed like a bad start because the spot I picked to eat and check out wasn't going to be as fun on a sunday, but didn't change the plan. the third date is the date you expect things to move along, but this was the worst date. I brought my A game but she didn't seem into the date from the start. It might have been it was a Sunday, she might have been in a weird mood, she might have forgot the first two dates and I didn't expect that to happen, I dunno what it was, but basically she was a shell. We got along like friends do, but she didn't have that sense of urgency to reciprocate the relationship to more then friends.
I had the friendzone thing in the back of my mind all night so I tried to avoid this. First I held her hand walking around, been doing that all along already. Then I tried making out with her but she resisted and said she doesnt like PDA. Then she told me she really likes me but doesn't know how she feels about another relationship so quickly. I made it clear to her I'm looking for a girl, I was also drunk and she wasn't. Terrible date, not a good performance at the end of the day. I walked her to her train and we hugged and decided to close all radio lines for a while and let her come to me. she texts me on tuesday saying what's up. I keep the texts casual. We've been going back and forth for two weeks and Ive asked her out again twice. She said she couldnt both, first was thanksgiving week and she had to help prepare for a lot of people and food, understandable I think, second time she said she works all weekend.
I basically left the last text with an open invitation to going out if she is available next week. I really liek this girl, she is very attractive, I'm alright I'm slimmer in average shape but I think we look normal together. I feared farking this up because I'm understanding my patience game is not good.
So my story is there I realize no one reads blocks of texts, but if you want to help, let me ask you. What would you do here? Do you think I've lost this girl? Is she interested, or did she move on? why? It feels better to just right this sh1t out but like you guys who i'm sure have had this hopeless feeling with a girl, I'm just looking to figure it out. I've made a decision in my head to let it go so it doesn't effect my work, but I really would like this to work out if it has some chance. Appreciate your thoughts.