So once again, I (to put it delicately) "screwed up" again. At least I had 24 hours to recover from my previous screw up with another girl.
I was having a nice banter text convo with another girl and the conversation went kind of like this:
Following some previous playful banter, she says "gay guys make me laugh," which was an indirect way of her playfully calling me gay because I always make her laugh and brighten her day. This is what led to the rest of the convo below:
ME I make you laugh too
HER Oh really, make me laugh then
ME Oh trust me, I will!
HER will you? I haven't seen you trying yet.
ME Because I don't try. I just do. But I only give it to u when u least expect it, not when u ask for it. It's more meaningful that way
HER: no it's not
ME Ok you win
ME How does it feel to win this argument, ....?
HER you don't understand arguments with me apparently. Still.
ME Ok then next time we meet we're just going to have a big fight. Why? So I can learn to understand u better Then we can make up afterwards after I win.
HER That's not generally how arguments work. Especially with me.
ME What do you mean? Hmmmm... are you trying to say that it needs to be spontaneous because its not the same when its done on command? ...
HER Well duh. That's part of it
ME Ha! So like I said, some things are best when its unexpected, not when asked for.
ME I love that smile on your face, by the way.
HER You are such a creepy stalker
ME Thank you
ME Glad I could make you laugh
HER I didn't laugh. You're just being a creepy ass stalker.
ME Am I?
HER Yeah, Kind of
ME Please explain
HER Maybe I just don't have the time to do that
ME You could always come all the way to (city I'm currently in) where I'm stalking you and talk about it.
I did end it by later saying "Have a good night. Try not to take things too personally."
Now, do keep in mind that it's not nearly as mean as it looks in typing because we do this ALL the time and it's likely we'll be texting again before the weekend is over and it will be all laughs and smiles when we meet again next semester.
The fact that I somehow ended up being called a "Creepy Ass Stalker" automatically means I screwed up because those terms SHOULD NOT ever come to a girl's mind when I'm texting her. This is THE FIRST time she has ever said something like this. She also knows I'm out of town so there's no way I could possibly be stalking her. I also wasn't the one who searched for and requested her on facebook (twice), and I was never the one to initiate conversations on her page or private messages, AND ---> I also wasn't the one who kept trying to invite her to my place then got upset and deleted her because she always turned down the offer to come over to my place saying that she made it hard for me to trust her because she was too unpredictable or hard to understand..... But SHE, on the other hand, did ALL those things to me... and we remained friends because I never reacted to any of those things and consistently remained a fun, playful, charismatic guy regardless of her behavior (and she even thanked me for managing to deal with all that). So yes, worse has happened, yet we're still communicating and meeting up occasionally.
In addition to this, the only reason she could come to the conclusion that calling me a stalker was appropriate is if I was right about knowing that she was either laughing or smiling when I called her out on it. I know her enough to know that she was at least smiling when I did a play on words with her and unexpectedly made her admit I was right about everything.
I guess technically I didn't screw up because as I said, I know 100% for sure that we will talk again. But I do know that if this were any other girl, I probably would've permanently screwed myself out of ever being able to talk to or see them again. That's what ticks me off the most - just knowing that I cannot trust myself not to screw up and having to question and monitor everything I say because I don't have the perfect texting skills that many others have. I hate that feeling of getting a text then having to decide whether I wish to (A) just don't reply or (B) risk screwing everything up.
I just wish communicating with and understanding other human beings was a lot easier and I didn't have to be perfect and always know the say the right things to say to have success in text & message communications and the opposite sex. It takes so much more effort to make and keep friends / relationships than it does to lose people or get into fights because of all the strict rules and requirements required for having consistent success.
I guess the question here is
DID I SCREW UP HERE? Or was it ALL facetious teasing?