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  • 1 Post By BdeAMOR
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Thread: Online Dating copy/paste message critique

  1. #1
    BdeAMOR is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Online Dating copy/paste message critique

    Hey guys,

    I use the following copy/paste message when I am too lazy or not super interested in the girl I am messaging. It has about a 3% return rate. Please don't be afraid to be harsh and give it to me straight!

    Hey, what's up?

    So okcupid has some "tips for success" that tells us guys that we shouldn't send women a long-winded first message... But that wouldn't be very genuine or true to myself so here goes...

    I read every word in your profile, and I find you very interesting. Some parts even made me smile. I can tell you're down-to-earth. On top of that, I find you very attractive. With all of that said, I would love to learn more about you.

    I hope to hear from you soon, and look forward to the opportunity to get to know you better.

    Brandon

  2. #2
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    KnightTurner is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Online Dating copy/paste message critique

    No

    No no no no no no no no no

    This is the exact opposite of what you want to do. Do you realize how many messages girls get like this? Take some time and read her profile and comment on something that she says.

    If you're feeling too lazy to do that, DON'T MESSAGE HER. If you can't think of anything good to say based on her profile, it's fine to have a standard opener such as one you'd use at a bar or party. But while you can pull off an opener like this in person, it's much more likely to flop. As you said, it only gets a 3% response rate. I always either comment on something in her profile or use a standard opener and have about a 70% response rate.

    Another thing to help you out is to make sure your profile is solid. If it's solid enough, you'll start getting girls contacting you rather than you always contacting them first.

    Bottom line, DO NOT DO THIS. If you're too lazy to read about her, pick out a couple of girls and read about them, spending about as much time as you would copy/pasting a message to girls.
    DOOOOONNNN'TTTT CAAAARREEEEE

    You are the prize. She needs to earn it.

  3. #3
    BdeAMOR is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Online Dating copy/paste message critique

    Thank you for the harsh reality! I think after reading several posts, I have more of an idea of the direction I need to go in with openers and first messages. I would say I am DECENT at pickup in person(two number closes today). But I SUCK at the online bit at the moment.

    Maybe you can take a look at my profile and critique it?

    okcupid: bdeamor

    thanks again!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Online Dating copy/paste message critique

    Online gaming is no different than doing it in person - there's a learning curve and it takes practice. You've gotten to being able to regularly get numbers in person with practice, same thing with online.

    As for your profile, it looks pretty good. I'm really digging the pictures, you have some good ones up there. As for the profile itself there's a couple of things I would change:

    1. Don't say anything more than once. You mention making people laugh twice, only say it once.

    2. Honestly, I'd change the About Me section entirely. I wouldn't talk about family, you show that in your pictures.
    Talk about what you love about SoCal
    Talk about your love of music. You say later that it defines your mood and is a huge part of your life, so it should be in your About Me.

    3. Change the typical Friday night. Make it a little more exciting or just go with something outrageous. "Just ya know fighting crime and saving kids from burning buildings" (best part - you work for an ambulance company so you might even have some stories of saving kids!).

    Obviously these are personal opinions. Feel free to ignore any of it you want, it's just what I would do. Overall though I'd say it's a pretty solid profile, just a few tweaks to be made.
    DOOOOONNNN'TTTT CAAAARREEEEE

    You are the prize. She needs to earn it.

  5. #5
    BdeAMOR is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Online Dating copy/paste message critique

    Thanks a lot man. GREAT advice!

  6. #6
    dm04lb is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Online Dating copy/paste message critique

    Sup fellas,

    I'm new to the community and have spent some time this weekend reviewing different angles and methods. I appreciate the lore and am optimistic about my game moving forward. Given I'm new I wanted to get some feedback on things I should pick up on or maybe try/word differently. I used a copy paste opener for a couple profiles this weekend that worked wonders - the bit posted under best first message ever (tried to link but I'm under 150 posts). I modified the message a bit to more accurately play on anything I noticed in their profiles.

    Profile 1: (her) Lol thanks for the novel , if were going on a road trip then we don't know where we are going, were gunna pic a direction and just drive until we find a place we want to be as for why, because we can I guess

    --I thought this was a little lazy and didn't really warrant a reply but I gave her one anyway--

    (me) I like your style, just drive, who needs a map or destination, we'll figure it out when we get there. I say we head west, what are we driving and any particular spots you want to stop on the way?

    (her) Wed have to be driving a truck or a jeep lol and no place particular that I can think of right now but hopefully a rib fest, there my fav

    -- I figured this would be a great time to tell her how boring she clearly is--

    (me) Wow really? That's not very creative, sounds boring. I'll just sneak out and hitch hike while you're sleeping.

    Profile 2: (her) Thank you for a great laugh. I am sorry for not responding to your last message.
    So if we were going on a road trip it would be kinda pick a direction and drive. As long as I could navigate or have a map of some sort I would be happy. As much as I am good to go with the flow, I also need to have some control. lol
    How about you? Where would you travel if you went on a roadtrip?
    PS. I was hoping that you wouldn't realize that that I was a man. I guess my cover is blown.

    -- I realize a second message was probably the wrong move, but I figured I'd give it a shot to see how it worked I didn't really expect to hear from her anyways --

    (me) I like your style, just drive, but do you really get to have control? kidding, I need a master navigator so that works out well. I say we head west, what are we driving and any particular spots you want to stop on the way?

    -- I wanted to tease about the control thing but I didn't have much in the way of ensuring it was a tease and not a neg so I added the kidding --

    (her) Being from the country I am going to say a truck. I want to stop in every province and see the top 5 things that they say you have to see. For example, I want to see "Wonders of Nature" in Winnipeg (yes I Goggled). But before we get that far I want to go the the African Lion Safari.
    You choose the second stop.

    (me) A truck is a good choice - let's say a Ford King Ranch with a camper.
    Alright, after a kick ass time enjoying the African Lion Safari, great place to start, we could drive up to the Bruce Peninsula and spend a night at the national park. I actually have a cottage in Tobermory not far from there, it's tucked away in a nice spot that is near scuba diving, canoeing and kite boarding. Had a lot of great memories there growing up. The night sky is so clear you can usually see the aurora borealis (northern lights). We got enough time for one of those activities before we leave the next afternoon, what do we do and where do we go next?
    ps. google is awesome, bonus points for you.

    -- I read somewhere that relating to things you've done is a good move, so I tried it there. I'm not sure if validating the google was a good move but I figured she put the effort in so I'd encourage her to continue to do so. --

    Profile 3: (her) So as I'm getting ready for my dodgeball tournament today and checking my email, I come across this message on this random dating site from this guy (who may be a chick pretending to be a dude) regarding my mental health, ability to entertain, and my most favourite - doubt that I possess sufficient mammary glads and the reproductive elements that any female would have.

    I laughed. So random, so entertaining and SO out of left field. I think you should add me to facebook. I'm under N--- -------- (------- Network).

    Also - I've recently been told that I have been invited on the road trip of the decade. It starts in northern Ontario and moves East to the most eastern shore of Canada, then moves west to the other side of Canada, drive up to the most northern point of the Alaskan highway, and then down to the most southern tip of South America. Coming back, we would drive up the eastern side of the USA. (Disclaimer: May include some detours along the way). We're doing this because it will be epic.

    What are we driving?

    -- Wow, what a response, lol --

    (me) My cover is blown, I was hoping you wouldn't discover my gender deception. You're quite creative, a road trip like this would require 4WD to be sure - and a trailer would be nice. I'm thinking a Ford King Ranch truck with a camper. I would prefer to drive, you could be our master navigator. I hope you're a good cook, or we're likely to starve! First detour in Quebec to the Citadel and Chateau Frontenac! What's next?


    Anyways, that's what I got, seems like pretty decent responses for a copy paste. I also used the 'I noticed you noticing me; so, I just want to put you on notice that I noticed you too. So don't be shy and say hi. ; ) ' which worked if I saw they viewed me first.

    After I finished writing this I realized how long it was, sorry guys. Any suggestions? Where should I take it next, I don't want to detail a whole trip around the country unless I have to, lol.

    D

  7. #7
    dm04lb is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Online Dating copy/paste message critique

    Not trying to hijack your thread here BdeAMOR, just didn't see a point in spamming the same topic if we could consolidate them.

    Ran into an interesting response on POF today, used the previously mentioned first message and she quickly retorted with a "seriously, worst copy and paste ever". I had a moment of weakness and felt a little defeated, but soon after decided that she wasn't worthy of that response. I fired back with "It's actually pretty good, and to the point. You seem to be one of those mean angry women, though - no need to take offence." I figured that would be the end of the conversation, but a handful of hours later (which I'm sure she was musing over) she came back with:

    "Bahaha im sweet n cute but dont like games and def dont like losers on pof that are going no where in life...Im straight to the point single mom of two work full time kids r in activities i go to the gym among other daily life i dont have time to sit and read every lame reply fr every loser in b-------...thats y my profile is so blunt "

    Her profile didn't disclose the kids, I'm not really worried about that as I'm just getting my feet wet here - I'll be considering my angle while I finish my assigned readings (college) - this is surprisingly a lot more fun then I'd previously expected, lol.


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