Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 5 of 5
Like Tree17Likes
  • 12 Post By BatMan
  • 1 Post By TheDuke
  • 3 Post By LockDown
  • 1 Post By youngpadawan

Thread: What is Qualification? - BatMan

  1. #1
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 31,552, Level: 100
    Level completed: 0%, Points required for next Level: 0
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social25000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Awards:
    Most PopularCommunity Award
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    2,151
    Points
    31,552
    Level
    100
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 12 Times in 12 Posts
    Rep Power
    1389

    Default What is Qualification? - BatMan

    Thanks for taking the time to look over this. One thing I've noticed is a re-occurring theme among aspiring PUA's. You don't need to be psychic, but to only read the title. I'm talking about qualification of course. I'm not sure if it's a lack of knowledge or lack of emphasis on this subject (perhaps both), but I have decided to create a starting point for everyone so they can begin to wrap their head around this highly overlooked concept. Then we can begin to really appreciate the gravity that this component adds to our game. This is open for debate of course. Because I am simply a man with an opinion.

    Imagine you walk into your favorite place. Whether it be a night club, a college bar, or even your local bookstore. You notice that ideal woman, with the proportions you desire, smile that sends men to heaven, and a laugh you'd kill to hear just a second time, and you then start to become giddy as Link if he walked into a room full of clay vases to smash. (Don't worry if you do not get the reference.)

    Finally you remember your game. Get back your composure and start remembering all the techniques you've been learning for the past few weeks/months. You get your "cool guy" Mindset out and begin to devise a way to approach. Once you do, you start whipping out material after material with boatloads of confidence exuding out of your pores. She then starts to show those amazing ioi's that make a man feel worthy to be alive! But then you aren't sure what to do from here. Do you show interest in her yet? It would feel awkward beings that you've been teasing her this whole time. It wouldn't feel like a natural transition. So you continue running attraction material only to realize that things are going a bit stale. You aren't escalating anymore, but going in circles. So you think, "I can lock in what I have if I just get the phone number and get out!" Great idea!

    So you get the number, talk for a few more minutes (because you know leaving immediately just feels like a pickup to the woman), and then leave. You text her the following day and she responds positively to your texts. Then it seems things quickly die out and it's like she's almost BORED of you. You then scramble for more techniques to run to get her back on course with your intentions to set up a date with her. Except nothing seems to work. The more you try, the more she is pushed away. Then you realize "Hey, I'm becoming too needy. I need to back off." So you disappear on her for a week, maybe two. Hoping she will contact you. The thing is...the chances become 50/50 at that point. How can you increase those chances? What could you have done differently to at least get a measly 60/40 chance?

    Now let's talk about qualification. You see, we all come into this PUA game with one simple mindset..."we aren't good enough." Yes you may be disagreeing at this moment. You have been successful in the game for some time and your confidence is unrivaled, but really think about it. Why are you here? The reality is that we actually ARE good enough, but don't know it yet. That's where PUA can show us that we are. Almost in a cult-like fashion if you think about it.
    One of the turning points in my game was while learning how to use qualification, that I realized that I have been approaching my game with this specific mindset "I'm not good enough" and that to pull off qualification properly, I'd have to start believing that I am ALREADY good enough.

    Notice that when we are parading our techiques for women to notice us as charming pickup men, it all comes from the mindset that we need to impress her by being different. This is great for learning how to use these techniques, but eventually you WILL hit a wall. A wall that cannot be overcome unless you get out of this mindset.
    Qualification, by PUA definition, is getting a woman to qualify herself to you as to why she would be a good fit for you. What a lot of us don't realize is that 9 out of 10 times when we approach a gorgeous woman, we have already qualified her in our minds and forget that she does not know this (or she pretends to not know). So we either show NO interest or too much. We don't think that we should take steps to allow her to discover for herself that we are slowly becoming more and more interested in her and want to know more about her as a person. Genuine high-caliber men know about this already because they will not just sleep with anyone. But as beginning PUA's we do not have the luxury of that kind of experience with women so we tend to forget this very crucial step. So how she perceives the interaction is this "Well he wasn't interested in me 20 minutes ago, but ever since (fill in the blank) he seems to be more curious." This shows that your interest in her is genuine because it is growing naturally.

    The first step to becoming genuine during qualification and to not forget this step is to, literally, write a list of traits you want in your ideal woman...and stick to them. If a woman doesn't have anything you are looking for then that's up to you to decide to continue. You can walk away completely and not even bother, or use those "red flags" you've developed to dictate how emotionally invested you should become when dating her. Does she meet your standards to be your future girlfriend? Or does she just look like a fun time? It depends on your standards.
    After this you'll notice that not only will women see you as a challenge and of high-value, but if she doesn't have what you are looking for, she may very well actually TRY to be your ideal woman so she can be with you. (Depending on the type of woman she is though.)
    Qualification can be direct or indirect. The most direct qualification statement you could make to a woman is "Why should I be interested in you? What makes you so different?" Unless you are a celebrity and she is massively attracted to you then this will only turn her off by your blatant cockiness. So there's always the more subtle route such as stating "Why do all women like to go out and get trashy drunk every weekend?" or "If you dressed a little more conservatively, I'd be all yours." Mind you this also incorporates some push/pull, but that's a different topic. So I hope this shed some light on the topic of qualification and you recognize how crucial it is for all of us to develop standards so that we do not neglect this important step. Feel free to leave comments about your thoughts.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  2. #2
    TheDuke's Avatar
    TheDuke is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 18,053, Level: 92
    Level completed: 89%, Points required for next Level: 47
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social7 days registered10000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    813
    Points
    18,053
    Level
    92
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    772

    Default Re: What is Qualification? - BatMan

    All very good points. Something I need to keep in mind more often infield. It's something I know before I go infield, but the minute I approach this is one of the first topics I tend to forget.

  3. #3
    LockDown's Avatar
    LockDown is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 7,026, Level: 55
    Level completed: 38%, Points required for next Level: 124
    Overall activity: 17.0%
    Achievements:
    Social5000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    873
    Points
    7,026
    Level
    55
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    332

    Default Re: What is Qualification? - BatMan

    DYNAMITE post BatMan!

    I want to say that this is something I have noticed a long time ago too but couldnt formulate a concise way of saying it like you did.

    I feel that MOST men do not think too highly of themselves because they KNOW WHO THEY ARE so they no all their own insecurities intimately. Then, when they see a reasonably together woman, they automatically think that she doesn;t have insecurities... that she is awesome and would never date a loser like said fellow.

    But GUESS WHAT??? She has insecurities... maybe even more than you! She is HUMAN after all ya know lol! She is not perfect no matter how hot she is. Therefore, treat all women like they are at the VERY LEAST as insecure as you.

    This sounds like a put down on women but its not. Once you start thinking this way, you soon realize your own value. And when women stop being Unobtainable because you STOP thinking they are better than you, than you really hit a higher level of PUA. You truly feel confident about yourself without needing to remind yourself that she is insecure also.

    My other pet peeve is when guys kick it to a girl who is hard to get and as soon as she shows interest or concrete ioi's THEY DROP HER. It's all about what you said BMAN... GUYS dont value THEMSELVES, so any woman who WANTS THEM are not Valuable.

    ex. Girl (who is an 8) likes a Guy (who thinks he's a 3) so he automatically puts her down to 3 because she can't be an 8 ("why would an eight like Me? Im just a 3!")

    Dont know if my example makes sense LOL
    Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.
    Oscar Wilde


  4. #4
    youngpadawan is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 117, Level: 2
    Level completed: 34%, Points required for next Level: 33
    Overall activity: 5.9%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered100 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    26
    Points
    117
    Level
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    9

    Default Re: What is Qualification? - BatMan

    sorry, n00b question but could one of u pros give a simple example of qualifying in like a conversation out of the blue? can't seem to figure out how to subtlely put across those points

  5. #5
    hometownextra's Avatar
    hometownextra is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 3,580, Level: 37
    Level completed: 54%, Points required for next Level: 70
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social1000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Appleton, WI
    Posts
    619
    Points
    3,580
    Level
    37
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    178

    Default Re: What is Qualification? - BatMan

    Pick a specific set of your points she fulfills and one she doesn't and mention them in one motion is easiest.

    I typically am typically only into brunettes, but you do have a flawless smile so I am a little lost.

    Shows you have specific tastes and also you cannot confirm or deny interest you have to be neutral undecided. The whole idea is it put her in a place that she starts qualifying why she should be with you but it has to be done without flat out hurting her feelings.
    Learn to be a better person not a better player.


Similar Threads

  1. Hey Batman,Red Baron and cody i guess...Ive got a question
    By Bobby Blaze in forum How To Get Your Ex Back
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 11-19-2012, 01:54 PM
  2. Recurring problem with qualification by me
    By Crazykevin in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 6
    Last Thread: 10-28-2012, 08:51 PM
  3. Replies: 5
    Last Thread: 08-23-2012, 03:57 AM
  4. Qualification Question
    By metal4life in forum General Questions
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 02-08-2012, 06:10 AM
  5. telling her about herself, is that a form of qualification or an ioi?
    By compgeni in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 05-25-2010, 05:18 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com