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  1. #1
    You_Said_So is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Need help on the next step

    Pretty new to the game as I recently broke up with me Ex.

    Went to pub that day and did an unintentional N-close. The girl is way too awesome and we spoke for about 3 hours in pub until the bartender had to come and request us to leave. I call her next day for date but she says can't on that day.

    I gave up easily and thought she isn't interested, but guess what I woke up one morning to her text. Couple of two and fros and she ended it.

    Came to this website through google and read a lot about texting. Did that 'Reminded me of you opener'. Worked wonders, though she wasn't curious to know what made me remind her, she really started sending long and thoughtful texts. I wanted to end this time, so after 4-5 to and fros I ended saying I have to sleep.

    Now I want her to initiate the next conversation. How long should I wait before I initiate myself?


  2. #2
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
    I.M.Mortal is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help on the next step

    First of all, don't expect the girl to stop in the middle of her daily errands or work, thoughts of you pop in her head, and then say I should text this guy. 90% of the time, the guy initiates. And no it's not necessarily needy. Neediness is reflected on what you say, how you say it and the frequency of you trying to get a response out of her.

    The only time a girl would initiate text on a guy she just met is she really likes him. Here's the thing. Only you will know this.

    Couple things to keep in mind. Just because ya'll talked 3 hours doesn't mean anything. You can talk all you want, you can find out you have all these common interest and talk about those subject matters, but all it really is just rapport.

    Do not get rapport mixed up with attraction and do not get trapped in rapport. Most guys can't break rapport to get on to the next phase of sexual escalation.

    But in your case, since she has initiated in the past, as for how long to wait for her to initiate? Well there is no etched-rule per say.

    What I normally do is I wait for a time that is convenient for me. So if I know that this Saturday I'm clear and it's a great nite to go out on a date, I will contact her a day prior, Friday with the goal of setting a date for Saturday. I don't set date too far in advance to mitigate flaking.

    If she beats you to the punch, cool. Build a connection with her going back to something fun at your first meet and set date.

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