Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 8 of 8
Like Tree3Likes
  • 1 Post By Flyboy86
  • 2 Post By topgunningit

Thread: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

  1. #1
    blitz8's Avatar
    blitz8 is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 255, Level: 5
    Level completed: 10%, Points required for next Level: 45
    Overall activity: 19.2%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    59
    Points
    255
    Level
    5
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    19

    Default Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    This is similar to my other thread but in a different context and what to try to understand why women stop responding vs what should I do (I'm already Freezing Her Out).

    For more background see this thread: http://www.puaforums.com/ask-expert/...g-tonight.html

    But basics: Met HB8.5 on POF, quick n-close, texted a good bit, met up 3 days later, got strong IOIs (playing w/ her hair the whole time, fidgety, eyes fluttering, good eye contact and solid conversation, pretty much described exactly where she lived).


    So here's the part of the convo and not sure if I came off needy, or the attraction went out like a light bulb, but I can't figure out why she stopped responding and just want to learn from it.

    Starting off Friday (IOIs were from lunch this day)...

    Me (5:01pm): 1 more hour till happy hour! Well, I hope :\

    HB (4:48pm): Not I, I somehow got stuck with a 6 pm call but I did relocate to my home office

    Me (5:16pm): Yeah, I'm not leaving just yet... Have a glass of wine for me before your call

    Me (6:55pm): Finally.... beer in hand at [place]

    HB (7:19pm): Nice, my mother talked my ear off after my conference call so im now pouring a glass of wine

    Me (7:21pm): You could always drive up to [place i'm at]

    .... no response... did that last text come off needy? I was hoping to show social proof, out at happy hours with friends, and if she did say she'd come, even better... wasn't a real invite or expecting it though...


    Saturday -- I open her asking out plans for this night -- she brought up being free on the way back from lunch, she flakes (details in other post, could have been legit reason)

    Still Sat, I re-open later on diff topic showing I don't care about the flake out... Context: I had told her before I was going kayaking this morning... she was at a viewing party for a college b-ball game, her team was doing well.

    Me (2:41pm): Heading home from kayaking.. just saw the score. Are your shoes getting wet yet (reference to prior convo where she said her shoes are going to get wet from all the fans of the other team crying)

    HB (2:48pm): Not yet but some are a little green with envy

    ... now I break the convo, was driving home anyway... on to new topic later in the eve....

    Me (5:10pm): I'm going to be sore tomorrow, already feeling my shoulders are tight.


    ... no response, but tell me what you think... What I was going for: reference back to dhv activity and also see if I could get some type of response that I could play into something like (or she would suggest) a shoulder rub when she got back from her business trip... I may have just failed miserably though.

    ... still nothing, I knew I should keep NC but I'm not good at this yet! I knew she flew to Miami Sun morning (is there for business this whole week)...

    Me: (4:41pm): Impressed you haven't teased me with a pic of beautiful Miami


    ...again, no response... was trying to be playful, may even get her to send me a pic of her at the pool (told me earlier this is why she was going down early sunday to start on her tan)...


    So... My two questions so I can learn from this:

    1. Did I screw up somewhere between the strong IOIs at lunch Friday and my texts? I feel my text game is really weak and am reading up on how to get better.

    2. Why do women not respond (if i didn't screw up)... especially since she almost always has been responding in an hour or so or less.

  2. #2
    Flyboy86 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 739, Level: 14
    Level completed: 78%, Points required for next Level: 11
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered500 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    101
    Points
    739
    Level
    14
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    39

    Default Re: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    Yea man to me it comes off a bit not needy per se, but too excited almost like "omg you are soo awesome I want to be around you all the time" While text game is important, don't forget that the real relationship is built face to face (or at least its much easier that way). My strategy is to text only leading to a meetup so...flirt text flirt text, "meetup line" then end it. If she is into the meetup then great, say "sounds good" or something like that and end it. If she says no or she can't. Say something cocky funny or just dont respond as if you really really dont care. If you try to push or act at all hurt that shes not coming it will show that you REALLY REALLY wanted her to come. Remember "we chase that which we can not attain"! Now you CAN text without leading to a meet up and it's fine under certain conditions. 1) it is random like you were talking to your buddy or about something funny. 2) keep it short (only 3 or 4 exchanges) and 3) YOU END IT! Either refuse to reply (Cause you are awesome and were so busy being awesome you forgot to answer) or say hey I gotta go. But the key here is you gotta initiate the ending, if she hints at it first then you do it...no good.

  3. #3
    Swagman's Avatar
    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 9,772, Level: 66
    Level completed: 31%, Points required for next Level: 278
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social5000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    United States
    Posts
    844
    Points
    9,772
    Level
    66
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
    Rep Power
    437

    Default Re: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    Dude, you came across as far too clingy. You should not have initiated so many conversations with her. You also should not have attempted to invite her over to your house just after you had met her.

    I think your best bet now is to just stop talking to her and move on. Just remember for next time: don't text her all the time and give her a chance to initiate every now and again.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  4. #4
    blitz8's Avatar
    blitz8 is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 255, Level: 5
    Level completed: 10%, Points required for next Level: 45
    Overall activity: 19.2%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    59
    Points
    255
    Level
    5
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    19

    Default Re: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    Yep - pretty sure I f-ed that one up, exactly why I wanted to learn from it. Thanks for the honest feedback. they say you learn from mistakes and I'm making a lot of them in my text game!

  5. #5
    topgunningit's Avatar
    topgunningit is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 4,514, Level: 42
    Level completed: 82%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 30.0%
    Achievements:
    Social7 days registered1000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    429
    Points
    4,514
    Level
    42
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    206

    Default Re: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    Its not mistakes. Mistakes is doing something completely unwarranted with careless intentions. You like someone and you say and do things based on that which means you are honest with yourself and to them. I would say you have learnt how to improve your attraction game. Period.

    Well good luck.

    Quote Originally Posted by blitz8 View Post
    Yep - pretty sure I f-ed that one up, exactly why I wanted to learn from it. Thanks for the honest feedback. they say you learn from mistakes and I'm making a lot of them in my text game!
    ------------------------------------

  6. #6
    ED11356's Avatar
    ED11356 is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 940, Level: 17
    Level completed: 40%, Points required for next Level: 60
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered500 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    Queens, New York
    Posts
    235
    Points
    940
    Level
    17
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    55

    Default Re: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    Quote Originally Posted by Flyboy86 View Post
    Yea man to me it comes off a bit not needy per se, but too excited almost like "omg you are soo awesome I want to be around you all the time" While text game is important, don't forget that the real relationship is built face to face (or at least its much easier that way). My strategy is to text only leading to a meetup so...flirt text flirt text, "meetup line" then end it. If she is into the meetup then great, say "sounds good" or something like that and end it. If she says no or she can't. Say something cocky funny or just dont respond as if you really really dont care. If you try to push or act at all hurt that shes not coming it will show that you REALLY REALLY wanted her to come. Remember "we chase that which we can not attain"! Now you CAN text without leading to a meet up and it's fine under certain conditions. 1) it is random like you were talking to your buddy or about something funny. 2) keep it short (only 3 or 4 exchanges) and 3) YOU END IT! Either refuse to reply (Cause you are awesome and were so busy being awesome you forgot to answer) or say hey I gotta go. But the key here is you gotta initiate the ending, if she hints at it first then you do it...no good.
    +1 for this.

    Basically, you gotta have the Mindset that it doesn't bother you that she couldn't be with you today. Move on with your day and do other things instead of sulking.

  7. #7
    blitz8's Avatar
    blitz8 is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 255, Level: 5
    Level completed: 10%, Points required for next Level: 45
    Overall activity: 19.2%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered250 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    59
    Points
    255
    Level
    5
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    19

    Default Re: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    All the feedback sounds about right. I need to get away from online dating... between work, time with my kids and everything else, it's tough. That and I have yet to have the courage to sarge solo... this weekend might be that time!

    I may (keyword is may) wait a bit more and give it one last shot with this chick... nothing to lose, right? Freeze Out has been almost a week, I'm going to wait at least one more. Hopefully I have success this weekend and DGAF.

  8. #8
    Slater is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 58, Level: 1
    Level completed: 16%, Points required for next Level: 42
    Overall activity: 15.9%
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    7
    Points
    58
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Why do women not respond or did I screw up?

    blitz8,

    I've been having a similar experience with a couple of girls. What I'm realizing, is you have to let them come to you. As Swagman said, let them initiate.

    I'm trying to get a second date with this girl who's been hot and cold for over a week, but I knew it was one I had to let merinade because she had just gotten out of a bad relationship with a guy and was still recovering. You can't be sure where she's coming from, but if she's interested she'll come to you, it could take some time though. Patience shows self control and that you have a life worth living and one she'll want to be a part of. You're too busy to text back all the time or have other options than trying to hang out with her. Friends, other relationships, a hobby or activity are good for filling the gaps.

    Here's what happened over the weekend texting.

    Me: What are you up to later?
    Her: I get off at 5, unsure how the night will unfold, what are you up to?
    Me: My friend is DJing out at "random place" I'll probably head out there tonight.

    ...no response

    But I don't text back or press the issue, just let it merinade.

    Monday morning
    Her: Hey, sorry I didn't text you back over the weekend but we should hang out soon!
    Me: Great, I would like that, I'm in "Random City" (near her) tonight if you want to hang out later on.
    Her: Ahhh! Tonight is girls night in "Other random city" otherwise I would.
    Me: Well, I have time Thu and maybe Sat.

    no reply...undoubtedly she's too busy having fun with her girlfriends to text back right away, but I'm fairly confident we'll be going on a date later this week. If not, no biggie...I have other things to do, and there's always all of the other girls out there I can still meet!


Similar Threads

  1. Women Is Testing Me I Don't Know How To Respond
    By onecliffd in forum General Questions
    Replies: 2
    Last Thread: 10-25-2012, 10:35 AM
  2. HB is into me, how do I not screw this up?
    By Mr Mischief in forum General Questions
    Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 07-15-2012, 07:22 PM
  3. How did I do ? Where did I screw up ?
    By Prestige in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 13
    Last Thread: 08-25-2010, 07:06 PM
  4. Did I screw it up?
    By TheApostle in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 12
    Last Thread: 05-24-2010, 07:22 AM
  5. Whey women are conditioned to respond to sexually animalistic male behavior!
    By maaximumseduction in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 3
    Last Thread: 12-20-2009, 04:50 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com