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  1. #1
    z7zx is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default First Date. Help?

    Without a lengthy back-story, I got the number of a girl in my college class I hit it off with. I was pretty blunt with her about what I thought of her looks and said she should go on a date with me on Saturday. So here I am now. We decided to go to the movies, which now I think was a shitty date choice, but wtf am I going to do now, right?

    Right now, I am looking to get into a long-term relationship, so that is my goal for this date. Right now, what I know about her from talking with her is that:
    -she works full time as an accountant
    -she commutes to the same city for work that I do
    -she used to work in a bank
    -she took a few years off from school before last year.
    -she is a road geek
    -she shifts from living at friends houses.

    I got her number on Wednesday and have not texted her for any reason other than scheduling our date. Texting is a really shitty form of communication and I would rather get to know her in person. With the outcome I am looking for, I know I should be asking questions that reveal her personality. Also, I know I should probably escalate with her on the first date.

    How do I escalate? Should I go for sex on the first date? Also, even though I know I need to make small-talk, I don't want to beat around the bush and spend the entire night bullshitting. I want to create some connection with her so that if I ask her to date me she will day yes. How do I create a connection with her?

  2. #2
    costarica's Avatar
    costarica is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: First Date. Help?

    My thoughts:

    1. How do you know you want a LTR with a girl you have never been on a date with? << no need to answer this I guess.

    2. All that stuff you "know" about her seem to be just facts. None of it really exposes any type of core of who she is, so it's basically useless except for talking points. Except maybe that she is an accountant which means she's anal, smart, sneaky, systemic, logical, or any or all of those.

    3. "Texting is a really sh1tty form of communication" << NO it's not. Maybe for you it is, but don't knock it just because it's not your style. Some guys can escalate the hell out of a woman of any age using text, phone, FB, or even love notes. No communication channels are "shitty." They may just not be your thing.

    4. If you told her she's hot and then she suggested a date, then that is one of those situations where you need to walk a fine line between being man-handled by a woman (her bringing YOU into HER reality) and you bringing her into your reality.

    5. If she is willing to go out with you already, just make sure you move her around to different places (I will often park far from the movies just to say "i like to walk" which gives me a good excuse to talk about the weather, hold hands, etc. that way you aren't "coming on" in the theater). by the time you do dinner, movie, walk, etc. then Kino should be working well.

    6. You are still free, and maybe urged, to be a man and say "i think the movies can be a shitty first day. we are doing x, y, z" instead.

    7. "With the outcome I am looking for, I know I should be asking questions that reveal her personality." << not really. if you are looking to get laid, then focus on creating attraction and escalation with sexual overtones. not getting to know her personality.

    8. "Also, I know I should probably escalate with her on the first date." << or on text, if you can grit your teeth and just try
    - CR

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