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  1. #1
    bhawker is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Topics for conversation in a profile

    One thing I am having trouble with is reading a profile and picking out the topics that would lead to a response. I want to come off as fun and witty but I feel like I can never come up with anything like that to say.

    For example here is a profile I sent a message to.

    I'm originally from Michigan and was brought up with those "Midwestern Values". I lived abroad for awhile after college and moved to Florida about 7 years ago. I love to travel and am somewhere here or there once a month and travel outside the U.S. at least once a year to explore and expand my horizons! I'm a very upbeat, happy person, who enjoys getting out on weekends and trying new things, fun experiences and being creative. I'm usually smiling or laughing and have a pretty positive outlook on life, but am random and quirky at times=). I spend much of my time with friends, family and my little dog and am looking for someone with whom I connect, laugh and enjoy being around. I drink socially, but would say I'm more into enjoying company and having a glass of wine or a mixed drink rather then going "clubbing" all night long. In a nut shell, I think class, loyalty, humor and warmth are very important in a partner coupled with a good sense of self and confidence! That's about it! Anything else, just ask!

    First Date: I don't mind getting together for drinks or dinner but also really like dates that include fun activities and something a bit different. Weekends away are great along with walks in a nature preserve, bike rides, parasailing, jet skiing, kayaking, ice skating, shopping, Disney, pool days, walking the beach, boating, golf, hot air balloon rides, indoor skydiving, etc....surprise me!

    I struggle with trying to find something creative to say. So in this case. What are some of the things you read in here that you think would make interesting conversation starters?

    I was drawing a blank and I decided to message her this

    Me: Where is your next overseas trip going to be? (I felt like that was not the best place to go but couldn't think of anything else to ask)
    HB: I'm actually going to China in August, coming up pretty quickly! Any fun places coming up for you?

    My problem is twofold. I can't think of something witty and playful as a response to escalate. I also feel a like I don't know how to respond to her questions because I'm not doing anything fun and exciting. I know this is very AFC but I know she is more fun and interesting than I am. This irritates me too because I know I am already starting off on the wrong foot.

    Any thoughts would be appreciated.

  2. #2
    konman's Avatar
    konman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Topics for conversation in a profile

    Personally, I hate these "I travel more than a circus" profiles. You'll have to use what you have in your arsenal. If that means 2 feet and a heartbeat just spin it with some humour:

    "I actually have something planned this weekend. I'm going to take a nice relaxing trip to a Chinese grocery store. It's just a little mini vacation I thought I'd treat myself to. I feel so tall there, like a celebrity! [Ask whatever you want]"
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  3. #3
    bhawker is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Topics for conversation in a profile

    Thanks for the reply. I think your answer was better than what I went with. Never heard back from her. I think I need to work on my arsenal. I am just struggling to be interesting. I feel like all my answers and questions are just blah.

  4. #4
    konman's Avatar
    konman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Topics for conversation in a profile

    I can relate man. It's super tough being a broke college student @ 27. I've done things to help myself through this 'i feel boring' slump though.

    Let me put it this way. If you want to become big at the gym, you don't just do bicep curls. Talking to women online is just doing a bicep curl if you're trying to get confident (aka be muscular). Your 'workout' needs to be well rounded.

    Go do interesting things, follow your dreams, get a motorcycle license, do volunteering for ski patrol/emergency crew, change your diet to be super healthy, get a crazy cardio routine, etc...

    All of these things will reflect confidence because it will be like working out more muscles in the gym to get that "look". That "look" is your confidence. Work out your confidence by making yourself as outgoing and interesting as possible.

    Hope this helps. Where would I start if I were you? Stop watching porn. Stop jerking it for a while. 2 weeks. Get hungry for women, and you'll be amazed how how "interesting" you suddenly become lol.
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  5. #5
    zerodark30rock is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Topics for conversation in a profile

    Quote Originally Posted by bhawker View Post
    I also feel a like I don't know how to respond to her questions because I'm not doing anything fun and exciting. I know this is very AFC but I know she is more fun and interesting than I am. This irritates me too because I know I am already starting off on the wrong foot.

    Any thoughts would be appreciated.
    The question is, are you happy being less fun and interesting, or do you want a change?

    If you're happy, just tell her straight up whatever boring crap you're upto. Trust me, you can make boring shit interesting, look around the forum. you're a student, if style can initiate a conversation about dental floss, you can do some phdcomics/xkcd type shit yourself (Nerd is the new cool, If Sheldon cooper from BBT came to my city, he'll get laid like a rockstar)

    If you want a change, give her the golden chance of planning interesting shit for you, girls will give amazing makeovers, tell you about so much shit that's going on across the city, and all the cool places in town. start with those.

    PS: Read the city papers to know about interesting stuff going on in the region, and groupon type sites can help too (discovering places + discount deals)


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