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Thread: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

  1. #1
    darkvatten is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Exclamation [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    There is a girl that I'm more or less familiar with since seeing her on social gatherings and on the street now and then. Unfortunately, those occurences when I did meet her I wasn't aware of any game strategy.

    So I have constantly displayed signs of beta behaviour, low value and weird (non-social) guy. I've been trying to get past all this damage I've done by chatting with her over facebook. At first all she did was ignore me but the replies have gotten more interesting since but I have a problem knowing if she's just playing or if I might have a shot at creating attraction with her.

    I've managed to initiate contact with her by helping her fixing her iphone (over facebook) at a time when she posted a status update asking for help. I can share my recent conversations with you. They originally in swedish but I'm fluent in both so translations are pretty accurate. I hope anyone experienced can help me out here!

    ME: you'll have to agree with me that It's really annoying with cute people when you try to finish an assignment.
    SHE: Haha what
    ME: you go in a quickie to reply to some messages and you'll get distracted when pictures of people you find attractive shows up on your feed.
    SHE: Haaha really
    ME: yep and unfortunately you're not guilty when it comes to this
    ME: hope you got something to say to your defence
    SHE: Hahha gosh
    ME: haha you can gosh all day long
    ME: either you remove that profile picture that keeps popping up or I'll have to remove you from facebook :/
    SHE: Hhaaha do what you want
    ME: Nah ofcourse I won't :P because believe it or not..
    ME: I've actually gained something valuable whilst talking to you
    SHE: Haha aha
    SHE: Like what

    ME: Well first off.. alot of things I've thought about you turned out to be all wroong
    SHE: What have you thought about me
    ME: amongst others that you were really boring.. but you are pretty interesting,
    ME: in the way you reply, but you're probably boring irl
    SHE: Hahaha yeah sure
    ME: see? now you're distracting me again ahaha you're so bad
    ME: with 20 mins left to deadline the least you can do is wish me luck ^^
    SHE: Haha no
    ME: haha geek
    ME: later
    SHE: Sure good luck haha gooodnight
    SHE:
    ME: LINDA
    ME: How's my favourite girl an evening like this
    SHE: Hahah hello doug
    SHE: Good

    She: Hwbyou?
    ME: Awesome over here
    ME: especially now that we got free schoolday tommorow
    ME: but you're a real nerd so maybe you'll become sad instead
    SHE: Haha what are you talking about
    ME: haha you do know we got a holiday tommorow?
    SHE: Yeees
    ME: Good! It would've been awkward if you went to school, would have laughed at you for several weeks
    ME: maybe you were referring to the fact that you're not a nerd?, because I've heard otherwise
    SHE: Hahah gosh whaat
    SHE: What are you raving about

    ME: Okay.... in the future I'll make sure there is a interpreter between us
    SHE: Hahah yeah
    ME: I'll make sure it's a good-lookig interpreter though
    ME: by the way, have you managed to repair your iphone?
    SHE: Haha gosh
    SHE: Yeeah
    SHE: I've updated and restored
    SHE: And backuped
    SHE: I did everything myself!!

    ME: My brother is playing xbox behind me and just asked why I was smiling..
    ME: You know how proud I am of you?
    ME: Hahahahahha *thumbs up*
    SHE: Hahahahh omg
    SHE: You must have thought I was retarded or something

    ME: No not at all (a)
    ME: you shouldn't worry, I'm getting more and more convinced over you for every day that goes
    SHE: Hahah good for you
    ME: I've even promised myself to remember speaking to you more often
    SHE: why
    ME: because (to alot of peoples suprise) I'm very forgetful
    SHE: Hahaha
    ME: and I'll have to agree that
    ME: (long pause) I got interupted as I was thinking out how to tell you..
    ME: simply put, you are my new hess
    SHE: Haha what the fark is jrdd
    SHE: Hess*

    ME: Don't say it so damn loud.. if someone hears you
    ME: they'll say "Linda! I wouldn't have believed or thought something like that about you.."
    SHE: What
    ME: let it stay between uss
    SHE: What are you talking about hahaa
    ME: you don't know what it means or what?
    SHE: no
    ME: Oh..
    SHE: :P?
    ME: Well, if you'd been someone else I would have told you but there is a problem telling it to you :P
    SHE: Ok don't tell me then
    ME: Good, because you're that kind of person that would easily misinterpret it
    SHE: Hahah okok
    ME: Haha.. I love how you're sitting and thinking "What the fark is Doug talking about.. is he tripping or what.."
    SHE: Hhaha exactly like that
    ME: Hehe.. that word does have a meaning though, didn't you go to *(this school)*?
    SHE: It's actually spelled *(correction)*
    ME: fair enough, I'll tell you when we meet, It's close to impossible over text since you'll think I mean something entirely different
    ME: and the last thing I want is for you to be confusing matters
    SHE: Haha yeeye
    ME: I'm just thinking about your best geeeek you know that I care about you(:
    *no replies* and I wanted to leave it at that
    This last convo took place yesterday. Can someone tell me by judgding from the whole picture if there is a sustainable momentum going on here or if she's totally disinterested. She's HB9-10 and pretty hard to get past. I'm not unnatractive myself except being short 5'4 (and that can create a huge problem) but taking inspiration from others I decided to still give it a shot.

    EDIT1: the hess thing I made up, I'm trying to come up with a cool story behind it to use if I ever manage to see her. I haven't asked out because I'm sure she'd say no pretty quick.

  2. #2
    vaebaen is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    it looked like it was going well till you said you care about her,never do that early on.

  3. #3
    sidewinder89 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    Ok I skimmed this and just from looking at her replies I don't think you've built much attraction.

    90% of the time she will just reply "haha". That's her on autopilot. She's not engaged in the conversation.

    You're trying to hard... just look at the length of your replies and her replies, says it all.

  4. #4
    darkvatten is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    Thanks! I read and understood your points. What are some things I should keep in mind for carrying on the communication between us towards more attraction? Or is it a dead case here?

    I want to ask her out, but can't know if it's too soon/creepy if she have enough comfort. I want it to escalate into LTR, so just forgetting this girl would be the very last option

  5. #5
    sidewinder89 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    You don't have enough attraction to ask her out. You have comfort and comfort without attraction = friendzone!

    In terms of your messages, you should mirror her responses in length. Also stop ending multiple messages before she replies. Send a message, she replies then you message again.

    At the moment you're just bombarding her with a kind of (look at me, pay attention to me) attitude.

    You also need to work on what you're saying

    " HER: What have you thought about me
    ME: amongst others that you were really boring.. but you are pretty interesting,
    ME: in the way you reply, but you're probably boring irl "

    this makes no sense... it's not really filrting or negging imo it's just bad. you were trying to get her to give a longer response... to do that go with something like.

    "Oh I just love it when girls are so chatty."

  6. #6
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    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    That conversation is not in your favor sir. You're showing too much interest while she's laughing at you. It's like you're her entertainment. You're chasing/ she should be chasing you!!! Don't keep chasing her, when she replies back, keep the message light, don't put your whole soul into it. Let her put in work, if she doesn't then you know she's not really attracted to you and you should move on and keep her on your sideline. I do that sometimes and I stopped it. Don't show too much interest!!!!!

  7. #7
    darkvatten is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    Creds to you guys for your observations. It makes sense to mirror the lenght of her replies. Unfortunately.. you are also on the spot with the notion that I'm giving her way too much attention. As stated in your replies, I'll have to try and make her the chaser. I guess I'm too eager to not letting the conversation die, which it easily does when all she replies is basically "Haha", but I'll make sure from now on not to spoonfeed her. Instead in those situations I'll make sure to re-initiate conversation at another time (days later), with another topic/message.

    I'm not stupid to think that I'm not close to a point-of-no-return right now but I like to keep the idea that with a little luck this tide might change direction. As such, I'll keep posting future conversations with her.

  8. #8
    marvilo's Avatar
    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    Haha yeah.. Don't message her on a topic that's boring.... If she doesn't message you back in a couple of days and you're ready to talk to her again try sending her this "it's been a long time since you haven't messages me back, turn around it's spanking time!!" Send her that and see what she says

  9. #9
    lenric's Avatar
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    "ME: My brother is playing xbox behind me and just asked why I was smiling..
    ME: You know how proud I am of you?
    ME: Hahahahahha *thumbs up*
    SHE: Hahahahh omg
    SHE: You must have thought I was retarded or something

    ME: No not at all (a)
    ME: you shouldn't worry, I'm getting more and more convinced over you for every day that goes
    SHE: Hahah good for you
    ME: I've even promised myself to remember speaking to you more often
    SHE: why
    ME: because (to alot of peoples suprise) I'm very forgetful
    SHE: Hahaha
    ME: and I'll have to agree that
    ME: (long pause) I got interupted as I was thinking out how to tell you..
    ME: simply put, you are my new hess"

    Oh my fucking dog, goodbye

  10. #10
    darkvatten is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: [FB CHAT] IOI or IOD, worth continuing?

    Quote Originally Posted by marvilo View Post
    Haha yeah.. Don't message her on a topic that's boring.... If she doesn't message you back in a couple of days and you're ready to talk to her again try sending her this "it's been a long time since you haven't messages me back, turn around it's spanking time!!" Send her that and see what she says
    Haha, I'm not ready to go that bold on her just yet. This girl sways away real easy from awkward situations and I might just find myself with a perma-block.

    Quote Originally Posted by lenric View Post
    Oh my farking dog, goodbye
    Some of the messages are not optimal indeed if that was what you were referring to. But I won't be saying goodbye to her just yet, champ.


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