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Thread: She's dating someone but wants me

  1. #1
    ct1006 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default She's dating someone but wants me

    Hey guys, these forums have always been helpful to me and I think I'm finally getting good withmy inner game that things are coming natural. I've been datig around woth a couple of girls and had some success, some failures and some completely wtf moments.

    I recently met a girl who is older than me, I'm 25 she's in her late 20's. We met casually at a bar that served brunch, she was so drunk she forgot everything but my name. So we've been talking back and forth and agree that we have crazy chemistry. We finally went out last night to a sports game and had a blast. Got drunk, lots of Kino, kissing and our team won. It was great. At the end of the night we walked to our cars (she drove straight there from work) and I threw in there, "Should we go to my place or yours?" She laughed it off, I live 1hr away, she lives about 20 minutes away. I wasn't dependant on the outcome, just wanted to throw it out there that it's on when the time comes. Even though shes older than me I took charge of the whole night and made sure to be challenging here and there. Told her to give me a better kiss, etc. When it was time to leave she lingered but since she didn't want to take me back to her place, I told her I gotta go.

    I know I shouldn't be too stuck on one girl and risk losing her if I chase her. I know to be a challenge and all that, but what are the steps now to ensure I don't fuck it up? She told me she's dating someone but really likes something about me and said it's not serious with them. Should I freeze her out and let her come to me?? I don't want to chase her into the other guy's arms.

  2. #2
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    She is seeing someone else find another girl and another girl and friendzone this one fast.
    i know a few girls who have some guy in thier life.trust me they don't even get half bit of my attention.I am more focused on the available ones.you may escalate but i tell you there no great feeling than being with a girl that you picked up and was single and you're kinda serious with.

    In a nutshell practice on all girls escalate when you want but if you find out they are hooked zone them.they will chase you then or find ways to be with you but yh

  3. #3
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    hometownextra is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    Beware if she ditches other dude too easy she may not be in it for a long run she may turn to the next one from you just as easy

    Not saying don't go after it just saying keep your eyes open
    Learn to be a better person not a better player.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    DO NOT WALK AWAY!

    You won't learn anything and you could miss an opportunity to at least f-close. Hometownextra is right about not taking her seriously. But that doesn't mean you can't have fun.

    She simply needs more comfort so she doesn't feel like a slut. Qualify her using this starter post I made and move onto comfort. Then your golden.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  5. #5
    ct1006 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    Solid advice as always Batman. Although I am intrigued and interested by her, I do want to mak her realize that I can walk away from this at anytime. Although it would suck, since she has the most potential of all the few girls I've been dating, I decided in my mind that I should leave if/when the situation calls for it. You guys are ab solutly right that I shouldn't take her seriously for now.

    Should I pull a gambit and just say, "hey lets cool things down a bit? I don't caer that you're dating around, but I'm not the type to be a second option. Give me a call if you ever decide what you want." ?? I guess it's risky but I am willing to lose her in order to get her. Does that make sense?

    Maybe its not necessary and just continue with what I'm doing? This is where Get confused. Thanks bros.

  6. #6
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    zoning a girl doesn't mean you don't talk to her completely it simply means she is not a priority like the others.you simply game them for fun

  7. #7
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    It depends. If you are seriously considering her as a real potential for a relationship then I'm all for it. (not recommended though) But if you are just trying to get "some" then who cares if she's dating other people. I sure as hell date other women. (Use protection! Lol)

    P.S. Gain some rapport first before trying to walk away. If you don't then she may be sad for 5 min before going home and banging that guy. So what would you have really accomplished? Other than going home with you "dignity" and your right hand, that is. Lol. (Sorry if you're a lefty. The stranger HA.)
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  8. #8
    ct1006 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    Hahaha.. Obviously, only I know where I stand in this situation, but I do feel like we have good rapport. When we made out last time we hung out, everytime I pulled away she would continue to go in for the kisses like she wanted more. Idk if that means rapport but it shows she wanted more. Even after I said I had to go home she lingered around and even showed concern by texting me to drive safe. We texted this morning and she still seems very interested, texting me pictures of herself, asking me lots of questions...

    I will say this we have ALOT in common such as personality, sense of humor, and we share alot of the same interest, she once said, "where have you been all my life?" I want to kickstart her decision to leave the other dude at the same time convey that I hold the power of walking away at any time.. And if she does, I'll definitely voice my concerns of her dating around and move to exclusivity.

    Anyways thanks for all your input guys. Let me know if you guys have anything else to add.

  9. #9
    ct1006 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    So a little bit of an update. I've started to give less attention to this girl while keeping busy hanging out with ither girls. She follows me on instagram and usually likes all my pictures except when there's any hint that I'm out having a good time with other friends (if theres girls in the picture). Anyways, I told her about tickets to a show that she said she might not go to. I told her, "I had such high hopes for you too." Which she then said, "Maybe I'll get them juuust in case" and kept texting me all day to find out the sales time.

    Later on I said I needed to get out and wanted to go on adventure this weekend and she said it's Mother's day. Which I totally forgot. I said, "You're right, lets do next weekend." And she said she's going to New York. I think ok these are all legit excuses and isn't blowing me off so I shot back "Well then just send me your schedule and I'll have my secretary call you." She followed up with, "Hm I'm a pretty busy gal, so I'll have my secretary call you."

    I'm thinking maybe she's trying to reframe it so that she has the power. I haven't said anything back. So I guess at this point there's not much I can do right? Asking her out again on a weekday is going to seem desperate. I don't text too often but I make sure not to send any static text..earlier I told her how busy work is and how I need a vacay. She said just to hide her away in my luggage. I said "what about my clothes? Ah. I see. We won't be needing clothes. Bad girl" i just got back a

    Not sure where to go now guys. Would a freezeout here push her away? Thanks for the input.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: She's dating someone but wants me

    Have you tried getting REAL with her? Ya know, build some rapport by revealing something vulnerable or just get on a deep level with her? If she feels you understand her and her world like no one else does she will love you. It may be just the ingredient you need.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."


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