Re: Got performance anxiety and ruined it
I actually think enough detail is listed to know what happened, and here's my take on the situation:
Keep in mind for a moment that women are very emotional people. For the past 5000 years, women have depended on creating emotional and intimate bonds in order to survive. You say that you were reserved with your emotions when she was opening up to you. Although men are not the emotional type, you should have at least shown some sympathy or some sign that you were understanding her. By the sounds of it, you did absolutely nothing but wait until her confessions were over.
Your second big error was that you let the sex happen, even though you were already unsure of the situation to begin with (anxiety). The sex felt awkward because it wasn't even out of pity. It wasn't out of romance, it wasn't out of a need to pleasure oneself, it was literally out of nothing. Of course the sex is going to be awkward if you do nothing to build up attraction. There was a slight possibility that it could have been out of comfort, but like I said before, you didn't do nearly enough to prove that.
Your third and final error was letting her go through buyers remorse after the sex. Buyers remorse is where she is feeling out of sorts because she feels that sex may have been the wrong thing. You knew that the feeling between you two was awkward, yet you let it linger. Even worse, after she opened up to you and the whole situation went like a bat out of hell, you just left. You got up, and you left. Not the right move to make there brochacho.
You did do one thing right, and that was that you tried to call her the next day. Although it was too late, to show that you were thinking about her does have a little bit of significance in the situation.
If you want my advice, you need to make amends for your wrongs. You need to call her and apologize for passing her off like that. When you are at the event, try to treat her nicely after that. Please note that I am not mad with you or scolding you, I am just hammering in my point. Women are not "things", and that's something that a good number of the rookies on here have to learn. They are logical, rational human beings, just like us.
"There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X