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  • 1 Post By Wolf24
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Thread: N-closed last Thursday; how to follow up?

  1. #1
    RicoSuaveInTraining is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default N-closed last Thursday; how to follow up?

    Quick backstory: I was at this summer outing work function thing at a baseball game recently. My company got us club-level tickets at the 755 Club in Turner Field (non-baseball fans: Google it, you America's-pastime-hating commies) and comped us an open bar, food, that kinda thing. It's a big bar, and we didn't rent out the whole thing or anything, so there were plenty of other people there.

    The alcohol was flowing freely, and I, like the rest of my functionally alcoholic friends, tend to drink like a fish whenever there's an open bar involved - what I'm going to hear from a crapload of you is that that was my first mistake (you're probably right).

    Struck up a conversation with one of the HB8s there who weren't from my company - I guess it was a mediocre opener, but for as drunk as everyone was, I guess it was good enough (y'all can critique, though): I was taking a drink while she was briefly talking to a friend of mine; our eyes met, she smiled and seemed to blush a bit, so I took that as an opening to say something - "I feel like we had a moment right there!" then blah blah drunken banter blah (she was drunk, too, and I'm actually fairly witty when I'm drunk; she was definitely laughing at whatever stupid crap I said, at least).

    Long(er) story short: I was getting her drinks on the company's tab (they didn't care), got the number, she left with the crew she rode in with, I blacked out and had an... uh, let's say "interesting" morning the next day (I'll spare y'all the details, though it's a funny story in its own right-involves being too nice/white to arrest and being sent to a hospital instead). This brings us to the ensuing text message thread the next day:

    (Morning)
    Me: Still alive!
    Me: Somehow....
    Me: What're you doing for lunch today?

    HB8: Something involving copious amounts of water
    HB8: To flush the alochol from my poor system

    Me: Sounds like a soup kinda day, then! Where you like going for lunch?

    HB8: I usually stick close to work

    Me: Are you on-campus? (She works at a university.)

    HB8: I'm not sure if today is a good day, maybe next week?

    Me: What you told me is code for "I called in sick this morning and might still be drunk by noon" - Which is cool with me! What're you up to tonight? (My lame attempt at countering her shit test; anything better I could've said?)

    HB8: Ha, no I'm at work
    HB8: I've just got a big deadline to meet by Monday and need to focus

    Me: Well don't waste time talking to me! I'll hit you up tonight, girl (Yes, yes, I know EXACTLY what you're gonna say about this one, and I realized it right after I sent it; hopefully still salvagable.)

    (Later)
    Me: Doing anything for dinner?

    (After a two-day Freeze-Out)
    Me: What up? You get your stuff done today? 'Cause this ain't gonna work out if you're unemployed now (My lame attempt to make up for the dlv I did to myself earlier.)


    And that's where we stand. It's a new week, and she probably got her work done, so that won't be a legit excuse. I don't think I shot myself too bad in the foot, and I'm just trying to keep her responding and the conversation flowing. I'd like to try getting at least a lunch/meet-for-drinks-like-how-we-met date out of it (or more), but it's tough to get ANYTHING if she doesn't respond at all.

    So here we go. Where would y'all go from here?

  2. #2
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    Wolf24 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: N-closed last Thursday; how to follow up?

    You just kept asking for a free day of hers to set up a date. But you didn't build on attraction or comfort.

    Only connection you have with this girl is the slightly drunk talk in the bar. To ensure a date you need to connect on a -shall I say- more sober level.

    Keep in mind Number Close doesn't really mean anything unless you make something out of it. Don't ever think like "Man this girl gave me her number so easily, she must be totally into me.". It's usually not true. Most women give out numbers like candy. You always need to assume that you're like a stranger to her when you are sending your first text. And what was your first bit of text was? A date. Would you accept a date from a stranger? No.

    If she's still responding to your texts, brush off the date talk, keep it light and fun. Try to build some connection between you guys. Refer to the amazing text guides in this forum, they are pure golden.

    Good luck,
    Wolf.
    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

  3. #3
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
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    Default Re: N-closed last Thursday; how to follow up?

    I'll chime in here. Stuff like this will happen. And alot of factors could've gone wrong.

    I'll point out some in your text that stands out. First of all, I mentioned before in several threads that a girl's attraction is fleeting. And even more so if they were drunk/inebriated. So you N-close this HB and she probably gave you her digits. When you re-established contact with her, her 'being in the moment' is over. I equate to getting off a rollercoast ride or exiting a high Special EFX movie. Reality sets in.

    As a side note, it's not alpha to buy girls drinks (even if it's not on your tab). If you are going to do that, make sure they earn it. Don't do it to impress them. If anything, they should be qualifying to you.

    So it seems like you had to start from scratch with a text game. That's why I AVOID GAMING DRUNK GIRLS.

    This is where your game got weak. All your lines are pretty much boring.

    To get a girl to respond, you need to spark their emotions and break her out of her robot mode. Here's the HB, she is probably going about doing her monotonous work routine. Texting things to a girl like "How are you doing?" or any form of variation of that is boring and routine. It's stuff neighbors can say to each other as a courtesy "How's everything. How's the kids." And the least the girl needs is another similar questionnaire text she needs to deal with.

    There's nothing in her response that shows that she is emotionally invested.

    Your text gets progressively worst with things like:
    Me: Doing anything for dinner?

    Too many plain boring questions like that makes it look like you are needy = unattractive.

    If you are going to ask a question like that, one technique is putting a fun spin on it.

    "What are you up to? Wait, let me guess...you're standing in front of a mirror trying to decide who is cuter. You or a puppy? Poor puppy never stood a chance."

    The general roadmap when texting is to
    1. Spark an emotional response with a good opening text.
    2. Build a connection with her using an inside joke or something you two shared. This is something unique you can only text this girl.
    3. Set up a date.

    There's a lot of good resources here and purchasable text messaging guides out there. I suggest you invest time and money if you are serious in honing your game.

    I would try to re engage her one last time with a text like:

    "Well it’s obvious you were abducted by aliens...I hope they were the hot Tatum Chaning type and not the fugly ones. When they return you, text me, I have a fun idea."

    Best of luck.

  4. #4
    RicoSuaveInTraining is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: N-closed last Thursday; how to follow up?

    Thanks, guys. I glanced through the guides (will delve more deeply in depth when I get the chance), and they clearly cover recovering from texts/situations that fall flat on their face.

    I've got some other prospects (some girls I'm meeting tomorrow night) on the horizon, anyway, so I'll let the Freeze-Out continue for this one and try to pick it back up next week (figure that's a decent length of time to let it settle, but let me know what y'all think about this).

    Will let y'all know how this shakes out. Thanks again!


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