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  1. #1
    Jsmith8988 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default What to say in this situation?

    So there's a girl on okcupid, who's about HB 6.5-7, but her personality is amazing.

    She opened me up with a nice decent sized message, and since then is always posting long messages to my follow up messages, even posted twice in a row at one point. We've sent about 10-11 messaged the past 4-5 days, and so I tried a Number Close method but said she isn't comfortable giving her phone number online yet,which I easily believe.

    So what to post next? I'm thinking of asking her to give me her Skype or Facebook instead till she's ready to give me her number at some point.

  2. #2
    Wolf24's Avatar
    Wolf24 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What to say in this situation?

    Seems like both of you are in no rush at all. So why occupy your thoughts with closing with Skype or Facebook?

    Just build some more on comfort and try n-closing again.
    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

  3. #3
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What to say in this situation?

    Very strange that she wouldn't agree to the number. Did you make sure to qualify? Definitely need to take it offline. Go with what Wolf said and wait a bit and go for the n-close again. But just do it soon before you lose momentum.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  4. #4
    Jsmith8988 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What to say in this situation?

    Well the conversation is pretty long so i don't want to post it all, but i'll post bits and pieces of it.

    Her opener: hey, how are you? My name is Nicole. After reading your profile I feel like we have alot in common and I'd like to get to know you! Where is the favorite place you have ever traveled? I went to Greece and Turkey in May and had the time of my life! Hope you're well

    I did a good job of negging her about her username in the beginning, cause she actually misspelled her username when she signed up for the site haha. We mainly talked about vacationing/traveling in our first few messages because what's ironic is she went on a cruise in late May, and I ended up taking that same cruise in early June which was crazy. So we mainly talked about which Islands we liked/hated, what we did on them, how the ship was, and she even told me how a steward tried to steal her's friends iPod.

    At some point, I told her "so just to get off the vacation talk, haha :P. Do you still live in Jersey, or did you move to NYC? What school did you attend?"

    -I still live in Jersey. Can't move to the city unless I find a job...so far, no such luck. What about you? I went to Pace in Westchester, not the city campus. Sometimes I wish I went to the city campus but then I think about if I went there, I wouldn't have the friends I have today! -

    Then me: Replied to it then did a Number Close blah blah.

    She: I don't feel comfortable giving out my number yet. What's the secret question, though?

    I think you're right that I didn't qualify alot. I'll do that and build more comfort before I ask for a n-close. Although I felt the fact that we went on the same cruise helped build some comfort and rapport already..I'll keep adding to it. Thanks..

  5. #5
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What to say in this situation?

    The important part about the qualification is the SOI (Statement of Interest). Once you find that thing that makes her unique you have to say something along the lines of "Wow, I didn't know that about you. That's so cool." Then you can choose whether or not to calibrate with "But don't get a big head about it."
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  6. #6
    ED11356's Avatar
    ED11356 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What to say in this situation?

    First off, that's pretty crazy that the both of you went on the same cruise, and around the same time frame. Lol..

    Second, the fact that she said she doesn't "want to give her number out yet" is actually a ioi. Means she does like you, but isn't yet comfortable with handing it out right now. And from what you said, you definitely need to build more comfort (and some rapport perhaps) before you go for another n-close. You're on the right track, though!
    Always be honest with women. That's the true meaning of a PUA.


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