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  1. #1
    oasis cakes is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default oh boy, here we go

    Long post—cliffs at bottom.

    I’ll start with a cliché intro sentence: Normally I would never go for a girl with a boyfriend. However, she’s different. And she’s a solid 9. Only reason I don’t give her a 10 is she isn’t as independent and ambitious as I like my women to be. Which is part of the pitfall of this whole thing. But she is very smart (we’re in gradschool)

    Phew. Now that I got that out of the way.

    Girl and I have a class together. Shes 27 I’m 25. She’s in an unhappy relationships and “seems to” want out. Second day of class noticed her eyeing me a couple times. Third day of class I went up to her and and another girl she was talking to, asked if they understood the lecture. Blah blah blah…I started explaining the lecture blah blah blah, the three of us and three others leave the classroom and walk to the parking lot.

    This is a night class so we get out at around 9pm which idky but seems to create an amazing vibe.

    So I’m talking with one half of the group and shes talking to the other half and I notice her continuing to glance over at me while we’re all walking to the parking lot. As we all approach our cars she says something that I respond to, the two of us start talking and everyone else leaves.

    We get to talking about basic normal stuff, some laughs, a little flirting, just getting to know each other a little better, she asks for my name we shake and we leave. (I forgot but I had wanted to get ice cream or coffee with her, but completely forgot to even bring it up)

    Next week, she’s walking outside ahead of me with a girl friend of mine (fuck yes—I love when girls I like get along with my girls because my girls can talk me up and speed up the rapport)
    I catch up to them and should have gone for the hug or something—girl is even looking at my arm seeing if I was going for it. In fact, she has noticed my body language on a couple of occasions and seems to (sub)consciously mimic my bl and mannerisms. We talk a little bit, a little joking, about the lecture, and then the three of us agree to meet up this weekend for a study sesh.


    We meet up on Sunday for study sesh, my friend doesn’t come so its just me and my target. We’ll call her, latin9. She’s south American born and raised.
    So we kind of study but more than anything it’s just joking and talking. i’m not going to lie it was a little hard for me to break out of shell at first, but eventually started going a little smoother. Not as much touching as I should have gone, but as the sexual tension rose a little bit she finally brings up the boyfriend. I completely ignored it and continued forward as if nothing happened. But then ten minutes later she brings up her boyfriend again. Mentions she been with him for seven years. (fuck. But more on this “seven years later”) Still act like she didn’t say anything. We keep talking and as we are rapping things up I tell her of a cool ice cream place. She says she’s getting dinner with her bf. Still playing things cool and even after that the vibe doesn’t seem to have changed at all we are still vibing pretty well. As we say our goodbyes I tell her thank you for turning me down I appreciate that (with a smile) she laughs and says we’ll get ice cream on wednsday after class. Cool with me.

    Wednesday comes and when it comes to getting ice cream she says she has to get the car back to her bf and can’t get ice cream. What…..the…..fuck……. i’m still playing it cool though. (inner dialogue kicks in and I realize if I’m going to make any kind of progress I do need to recognize and aknowledge that she has a bf)
    Few days go by and I call her up to see if shes on campus and wants to get lunch. She doesn’t answer, but texts back right away saying she’s in a meeting but can text me. Side note: the longer we’ve been texting the more she uses the same language, phrases, smileys and emojis I used during text. Again, imitation is the strongest form of flattery.

    She can’t meet up but says thanks for the invite and hehehe and all that stupid shit.

    A week later she texts me. She just got back from Hawaii for a few days.

    I don’t ask with who or anything, and she doesn’t tell me much about it but I can assume. So were used to seeing eachother every 4 or 5 days but haven’t seen eachother in about two weeks, During lecture (three days ago) she comes and sits right next to me (that’s a first) she has her hair all did, make up, she has a new tan and just looks fucking sexy. Got damn.

    I look over at her smile look at her lips and she just starts giggling. Midway through the lecture prof says some pretty random cool shit I look over at her, give her an “oh shit that’s cool look” she immediately reciprocates the look, and then starts giggling.
    (I notice actually, that when a girl is really into me this is one of the first things I notice. A girl will start acting out some of my mannerisms.)
    If I may say this without bragging I have a pretty charismatic personality and am easy on the eyes and people seem to like me and follow my lead.

    Back to my story. So class gets out and we’re walking back she’s just laughing at everything I say. Like, Im not that funny. Its not one of my strengths but she’s eating up everything I dish out. We’re making strong eye contact and I just want to pin her up against one of the buildings and fuck her right there. I tease her a cuoople times for trying to seduce me and although

    I don’t think she fully understood the joke she got enough of it to start blushing and giggling. I love the way she looks when I talk to her. Its amazing.
    She starts to walk away from me as we get closer to her car (this isn’t the first time she has done this—is this just her getting nervous?)

    I ask for a ride back to my car because it’s parked on an opposite side of campus, she happily agrees. (I’m thinking she just gets nervous when it comes to sexual tension, or goodbyes, or moving the interaction forward to a new location because as long as I lead the situation she complies. Usually.)

    While were in the car (I should have tried to bounce this to coffe/ice cream/food-shit- I get so lost in our convos that I’m not even thinking about a stradegy anymore. She’s just a fucking awesome human being. I could literally sit and do nothing with her all day and not be bored for a single second.)

    So we get to my car and Fluff talking, I knew previously that I needed to aknowledge she has a bf. I don’t remember how it was brought up but I ask if she lives with her paretns room mates etc. she say she lives with her bf. I say, why do I feel like he’s 35. She says no he’s 41.

    I tried. I promise I tried to keep my poker face.

    She says what…

    Me: nothing, that seems healthy

    Her: what is healthy, are you being sarcastic.

    Me: no that seems pretty normal…and you guys have been dating seven years…so when you were 20 he was 34.

    Her: I don’t remember but she hasn’t gotten defensive yet

    Me: so why did you say no?

    Her: why did I say no when?

    Me: when he asked you to marry him? (lol point one for oasis cakes)

    Her: he never asked me, why would he have to ask me? (a little frusterated)

    Me: Idk, if I was dating someone as amazing and beautiful as you for seven years….yea, I’m definitely thinking about getting down on one knee.

    Her: well we haven’t really been dating for seven years. It’s been more like three years on and off.

    Me: oh, so he’s a douchebag? (why the FUCK did I say this :/)

    Her: he’s not a douche bag.

    Me: I iddn’t mean to be offensive, I’m sure he makes you really happy. He takes you to nice vacations to Hawaii.

    Her: actually Hawaii was kind of bitter sweet. We ended up fighting.

    Me: do you have a picture of him.

    Her: shows me picture.

    Me: (I promise I tried to hide behind my poker face)

    Her: ….what….

    Me: he looks like your dad (lolololol WHY the FUCK did I say this)

    Now she starts to get upset, and taking it personal (naturally) says it’s my problem she is dating someone older blah blah blah. So here is the thing. He supports her on everything. He pays the rent for their, apt, he pays for her car, he buys her clothes, everything. She’s going to school so she can be financially independent but until then. If she breaks up with him, she’s kinda fucked.
    I kind of fucked up because I didn’t need to have this convo here. We were riding a good high and ended it on a negative note. We agreed to meet up on Saturday, (today) and went our sepearte ways. ten minutes after she had dropped me off , she texts me saying shes not mad, I should just becareful of the way I talk, I don’t text back right away. She sends another text saying everyone has their own opinion and she’s been hearing about how she shouldn’t be dating this guy since she started. I still haven’t text back, she sends one last text saying anyways, no big deal, have a good night. I wait an hour text her, its all cool, have a good night, see you Saturday.

    I text her today to see if today still works at x time. She sends a quick “sorry cant make it” response
    And that’s where I’m at now. I know this is a really long post. Thank you to anyone who read the whole thing. What do I do now? should I try to invite her out tomorrow? Or give her time to miss me?
    Any feedback, responses, advice, critiques, suggestions are welcome. Thanks.

    CLIFFS:
    Me:25 Girl:27 grad school.

    -Lots of rapport, flirting etc.

    -she doesn’t mention bf right away. Once sexual tension rises—she mentions bf

    -I play it off like nothing happened.

    -things never get awkward or weird

    -shes more than okay being isolated with me, I ask her out says she has to meet up with bf

    -“oh shit” moment, am I just a friend? Nahhh…..

    -things stay flirty, she mimics my mannerisms(say that ten times
    fast) always laughing at my jokes (and I’m not that funny)

    -havent seen her in two weeks, she went to Hawaii with bf- says it was bitter sweet they were fighting

    -she looks oh so sexy when she comes back

    -strong eye contact good touching, flirting, laughing (again, humor isn’t one of my strengths) and mimicking (one of the first things I look for when determining if a girl is into me close to 100% fool proof)

    -and then this:

    . So class gets out and we’re walking back she’s just laughing at everything I say. Like, Im not that funny. Its not one of my strengths but she’s eating up everything I dish out. We’re making strong eye contact and I just want to pin her up against one of the buildings and fuck her right there. I tease her a cuoople times for trying to seduce me and although I don’t think she fully understood the joke she got enough of it to start blushing and giggling. I love the way she looks when I talk to her. Its amazing.

    She starts to walk away from me as we get closer to her car (this isn’t the first time she has done this—is this just her getting nervous?) I ask for a ride back to my car because it’s parked on an opposite side of campus, she happily agrees. (I’m thinking she just gets nervous when it comes to sexual tension, or goodbyes, or moving the interaction forward to a new location because as long as I lead the situation she complies. Usually.)

    While were in the car (I should have tried to bounce this to coffe/ice cream/food-shit- I get so lost in our convos that I’m not even thinking about a stradegy anymore. She’s just a fucking awesome human being. I could literally sit and do nothing with her all day and not be bored for a single second.)
    So we get to my car and fluff talking, I knew previously that I needed to aknowledge she has a bf. I don’t remember how it was brought up but I ask if she lives with her paretns room mates etc. she say she lives with her bf. I say, why do I feel like he’s 35. She says no he’s 41.

    I tried. I promise I tried to keep my poker face.

    She says what…

    Me: nothing, that seems healthy

    Her: what is healthy, are you being sarcastic.

    Me: no that seems pretty normal…and you guys have been dating seven years…so when you were 20 he was 34.

    Her: I don’t remember but she hasn’t gotten defensive yet

    Me: so why did you say no?

    Her: why did I say no when?

    Me: when he asked you to marry him? (lol point one for oasis cakes)

    Her: he never asked me, why would he have to ask me? (a little frusterated)

    Me: Idk, if I was dating someone as amazing and beautiful as you for seven years….yea, I’m definitely thinking about getting down on one knee.

    Her: well we haven’t really been dating for seven years. It’s been more like three years on and off.

    Me: oh, so he’s a douchebag? (why the FUCK did I say this :/)

    Her: he’s not a douche bag.

    Me: I iddn’t mean to be offensive, I’m sure he makes you really happy. He takes you to nice vacations to Hawaii.

    Her: actually Hawaii was kind of bitter sweet. We ended up fighting.

    Me: do you have a picture of him.

    Her: shows me picture.

    Me: (I promise I tried to hide behind my poker face)

    Her: ….what….

    Me: he looks like your dad (lolololol WHY the FUCK did I say this)

    Now she starts to get upset, and taking it personal (naturally) says it’s my problem she is dating someone older blah blah blah. So here is the thing. He supports her on everything. He pays the rent for their, apt, he pays for her car, he buys her clothes, everything. She’s going to school so she can be financially independent but until then. If she breaks up with him, she’s kinda fucked.

    I kind of fucked up because I didn’t need to have this convo here. We were riding a good high and ended it on a negative note. We agreed to meet up on Saturday, (today) and went our sepearte ways. ten minutes after she had dropped me off , she texts me saying shes not mad, I should just becareful of the way I talk, I don’t text back right away. She sends another text saying everyone has their own opinion and she’s been hearing about how she shouldn’t be dating this guy since she started. I still haven’t text back, she sends one last text saying anyways, no big deal, have a good night. I wait an hour text her, its all cool, have a good night, see you Saturday.

    I text her today to see if today still works at x time. She sends a quick “sorry cant make it” response

    And that’s where I’m at now. I know this is a really long post. Thank you to anyone who read the whole thing. What do I do now? should I try to invite her out tomorrow? Or give her time to miss me? or what. i feel like she's definitely interested but is stuck in a situation where wtf happens if her bf finds out, or wtf happens if she leaves him before she can support herself type of deal.

    couple things: no, it's not oneitis, i'm still dicking other girls.
    yes, it is possible to go from one relationship to another and not worry about being cheated on. i dont think angelina jolie ever worries that brad pitt will leave her for a new girl.

  2. #2
    oasis cakes is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: oh boy, here we go

    anyone?













    (this is just to fill up 30 characters)

  3. #3
    easyflow is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: oh boy, here we go

    Long post Bro, but I got through it.

    If you want to mess around with anther guys GF that is your call. Angelina aside, if you think she won't do the same to you, don't be so sure Bro.

    Don't invite her out again. Wait to see her in class. If she contacts you before class, get it so, it is her asking you out.

    If you do not hear from her, wait until class. In my opinion, Kino leads to kiss close. So in class, if she sits beside you again, start some kino, it is usually better if the girl starts first, but if not, try some BS kino routines.

    If she is wearing earrings, make comment about them, touch them, but also touch bottom of ear. If she has a tan, go bare arm skin to skin to show how dark she is compared to you. If it is appropriate in class, ask her if she is ticklish, gently squeeze lower thigh, above knee cap, or poke her side stomach. "I thought you worked out, a little thick", give her love handles a light squeeze.

    At this point, you'll know if she is comfortable with you making physical contact. If you feel she is getting weird about it, or is not reciprocating, STOP doing it.

    If she is reciprocating, this is good. While walking to vehicle, tell her she is such a brat, and give her a light spank on her but. If she asks "Why am I a brat?", just play it off, "What, you don'y know why? I'll tell you later", and change subject.

    Ask for a ride to the other side of campus to your car. BEFORE she begins to drive to your car, escalate the kino. Do some BS palm reading sh1t, while doing it, look into her eyes, then down to her lips, back and forth. Finally if The Vibe is there, go in for a kiss.

    Try to do some of this before she begins to drive back to your car. Because there is a good chance she will slow things down.

    At any point, if she says stop, no or don't. Back off, wait a bit and slowly start up again. Use your judgement Bro, respect her space.

    Keep us updated.

  4. #4
    AlexandreUU is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: oh boy, here we go

    you know where your advantage is? your the young guy and he's not. so show her that. show her that you have a young fun life filled with exciting things to do and that she shouldnt be in Hawaii fighting. she should be in Hawaii and anywhere else having fun and laughing and enjoying life. you have to demonstrate that thats how you treat life. with enjoyment and excitement. shes clearly not enjoying her relationship but since shes been with him for so long and since he financially takes care of her, its hard for her to just forget him all of a sudden for a new dude. so you have to tell her exciting stuff about yourself. make up sh%t if you have to but just let her know what a awesome guy you are outside of school. and that all that exciting stuff that you do would be very fun for her to if she liked to join. if she says no or that she cant like she has been doing so far then on to the next one dude. let her know that if she changes her mind to just let you know but for the meanwhile, STOP continuing giving her any more attention when shes not returning the favor. its not cool that your working her with all your game and shes not giving anything back. your being all nice and sh%t and she keeps declining your advances.

  5. #5
    Ice Breaker's Avatar
    Ice Breaker is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: oh boy, here we go

    BF Destroyer technique is the tool you'll need. Nothing more for me to say.

  6. #6
    oasis cakes is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: oh boy, here we go

    If you want to mess around with anther guys GF that is your call. Angelina aside, if you think she won't do the same to you, don't be so sure Bro.
    Completely understand where you're coming from. I honestly believe she's been looking for a way out. I appreciate the comment nonetheless and will be cautious.

    If she is wearing earrings, make comment about them, touch them, but also touch bottom of ear. If she has a tan, go bare arm skin to skin to show how dark she is compared to you. If it is appropriate in class, ask her if she is ticklish, gently squeeze lower thigh, above knee cap, or poke her side stomach. "I thought you worked out, a little thick", give her love handles a light squeeze.
    Cool, thanks. I will admit that my Kino game with her has been sub par. Actually on campus in general I probably play things a little too safe because I'm involved in student gov and non profits associated with the university and it's always in the back of my mind of making a wrong move and hurting my reputation-i guess you could call this an irrational sticking point.

    you know where your advantage is? your the young guy and he's not. so show her that. show her that you have a young fun life filled with exciting things to do and that she shouldnt be in Hawaii fighting. she should be in Hawaii and anywhere else having fun and laughing and enjoying life. you have to demonstrate that thats how you treat life. with enjoyment and excitement
    I definitely agree and use this to my advantage. I create a lot of "us" frames of adventures and fantasies etc. I'll keep doing this, thanks.

    since shes been with him for so long and since he financially takes care of her, its hard for her to just forget him all of a sudden for a new dude.
    I think this is the whole reason she has been so hesitant. There is no question in my mind that she's attracted. But it's a huge deal and I understand why she would be so nervous about jumping into something so new. Regardless of if she's looking for a way out, she's a girl and doesn't want anyone getting hurt in this thing.

    BF Destroyer technique is the tool you'll need. Nothing more for me to say.
    Awesome, thanks.

    I know it was a REALLY long post but thanks for the replies. Any other feedback appreciated.


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