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  • 1 Post By DirectIsBest

Thread: Big risk, no reward...comfort a better route?

  1. #1
    Bballking is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Big risk, no reward...comfort a better route?

    Quick background, I posted part of this in field report but here's the details. Met HB8 at a party last Friday night down at the Uni I graduated from. Talked and bantered for maybe 3 minutes, tops. I had to leave and she told me to take her number. I told her she could have mine, she'd hit me up if she wanted to talk. She took it and had a quick make out sesh. She text me later that night but logistics were bad and we couldn't meet. I'm heading back down this weekend, but first text her last night to keep her mind on me.

    Me: Hey there
    Her: Hi (:
    Me: Your smiley faces are backwards
    Her: Not as backwards as your smiley faces haha
    Me: They might be. but only in a mirror so i need some costume ideas for this weekend. i was thinkin either a slutty witch or a slutty nurse. what ya think?
    Her: haha as long as it has slutty in it i'm sure it will be a great costume
    Me: Haha yeah.. u'd want me to be a little scandalous
    Her: where's the fun in being boring
    Me: guess i'll jus have to find something that compliments my package than haha
    Her: haha that sounds like a good idea
    Me: oo u'd like that huh?

    Got caught up in the last line. I knew I was at a point where i could look to flirt and build sexual tension or go for comfort; I'm not going to be down there til friday. I'm not too worried about the text itself or the situation, but more of what to do when at that crossroads, I really didn't know what to do. It took me a while to make up my mind, and I haven't heard back all day. As a learning lesson, would the sexual tension push be best i.e. the last text sent, or should you look to build some comfort at that point instead?

  2. #2
    DirectIsBest's Avatar
    DirectIsBest is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Big risk, no reward...comfort a better route?

    Dude you did good! I wouldn't have put the question mark at the end, so it looks more like a statement. Honestly the best scenario is if you didn't text her that last text at all. You had a good fun convo...It really didn't need to go any further.

    I personally don't like to be sexual over text unless I've already hooked up with the girl. So much can be misinterpreted. You had a great close and a good convo already...there's no need to push it. It's always best to escalate that way in person. I think guys get too involved in text game.

  3. #3
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    cdharders is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Big risk, no reward...comfort a better route?

    Quote Originally Posted by DirectIsBest View Post
    Dude you did good! I wouldn't have put the question mark at the end, so it looks more like a statement. Honestly the best scenario is if you didn't text her that last text at all. You had a good fun convo...It really didn't need to go any further.

    I personally don't like to be sexual over text unless I've already hooked up with the girl. So much can be misinterpreted. You had a great close and a good convo already...there's no need to push it. It's always best to escalate that way in person. I think guys get too involved in text game.
    Agree with DirectisBest. Great job! Since you aren't going to see her til the weekend, eventually the conversation is going to have to stop. And you can only build sexual Tension so much before it will deflate.

    That last text, think I would've switched attention to her and asked what she was going to be then started finding out more details of what she was up to and create some future projections. The future projections will build comfort, her qualifying makes her put more skin in the game, and going too far sexually is going to make her less likely to meet up with you. Think you did exactly the right amount of flirting.

    I like to leave question marks even at end of statements as a prompt for the girl to know to respond. Otherwise, sometimes they just leave it, then you are more lost than losing a half value point by adding a question mark.

    That help?

  4. #4
    maxtazm is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Big risk, no reward...comfort a better route?

    ya you are doing good, and making progress, just keep pushing your limits and you'll get even better results


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