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Thread: Facing a dilemma - help please

  1. #11
    cdharders's Avatar
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Quote Originally Posted by pepito View Post
    Hey hey, I finally secured a date with girl B for a movie night at my place on Friday

    Now, I am thinking when it would be best for me to contact girl A. I will probably send a text either on Thursday or Friday and suggest we meet on Saturday or Sunday night. She seems to be more of a house-cat, so I don't have the impression she does a lot on week-ends (well, she is unemployed, so it's not like she has the money for it).

    She will probably accept, but as I said in my other thread (http://www.puaforums.com/ask-expert/...ce-please.html), she might be doing so for networking purposes. I guess our next meeting will kinda be decisive on whether I end in the friend-zone or not.
    Nice! Movie night is a great date! What day were you planning to meet Girl A ?

  2. #12
    pepito is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Well, turns out I was out of luck this week

    There was a misunderstanding with girl B and we didn't have a movie night at my place in the end. She said "a Thursday or a Friday would be convenient for her" and I thought she actually meant this week. She had a bday party to attend this Friday, so we postponed it. At least, this grants some more time in order to see how things will go with girl A.

    Concerning girl A, I wrote her again on Thursday to suggest that we go to the cinema on Sunday but she replied from the airport that she was going back to her home country for 1 week.
    I sent her a text the day after, wishing her to have fun and enjoy the warm weather where she was going. She texted back telling me that she will send some positive energy so that I may have good weather too (and she added a smilie) and wished me a nice w-e.

    I will be very busy for the 2 coming weeks, so I won't even bother calling girl B. How about girl A? Should I text her again in a few days?
    And when she comes back, do I have to ask her out again?
    I am not very comfortable with this situation as I have already asked her out twice and she refused both times (for legitimate reasons admittedly, but still...).

    Any advice on what to do?

  3. #13
    BigT is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Lay low on both. Don't text either and only text girl A 4-9 days after she arrives back unless she text you first
    I may be a starter but I like to help whatever ways I can

  4. #14
    pepito is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Ok, I stopped all contact with girl B. No news from her part either (but she did tell me that she would be away for business during these days).

    I sent a text on my own initiative to girl A and she replied 3 days later with a quite detailed email (she said she had so many things to tell me that a text would not be enough). The tone of her email was warm and sweet overall and she told me small personal things (like how she loves spending the day near the chimney, about some theater plays she watched, etc.).

    I was surprised with her friendliness and her willingness to talk about her and the stuff she was doing. I have the impression we sort of "get closer" (of course, I could be overreacting and she's simply keeping contact for networking - even though I made it perfectly clear to her that I cannot help her find a job in my organization).

    She has an open return ticket, so I have no idea if I will see her again until after the New Year. Oh well, time to get busy with other chicks...

  5. #15
    pepito is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Small update:

    Seems like I scared off girl B. She didn't reply to my last message. I think I was too upfront when I suggested a movie night at my place, lol. Ok, no big loss.

    The game is still going on with girl A. I text her like once per week (sometimes on a Saturday, other times on a week day) to not let her forget about me. I tell her about the stuff I am doing and try to dhv.

    Seems like it's working. One time, she replied to my text within 5 mins. I wrote her this Monday again and she replied the next day (she sent 6 sms at once!). I think she likes the fact that I am interested in her, hehe.

    We both come from the same country and am going back home within a tenday. Do you think I should meet her or just do my thing (I have plenty of family and friends to visit anyway)?


    I have created an OKCupid account just to kill time and sharpen my skills as I don't have much time for sarging these days.
    Some of the advice I found on these forums are pure gold!

  6. #16
    BigT is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    If a dating site helps with your confidence go right ahead to doing it. Also i don't know what exactly you were texting when you suggested movie night with B but i know one thing, being straight up and honest is good but keep in mind contacted YOU in the first place because of a job. Make sure you help her with the job search but also convey the fact that you want more.

    Also if when you dhv dont project the image that your a player. Thats not what girls or women want. In psychology women wants a leader, a guy that can support the family and someone that can protect them.
    I may be a starter but I like to help whatever ways I can

  7. #17
    pepito is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Quote Originally Posted by BigT View Post
    If a dating site helps with your confidence go right ahead to doing it. Also i don't know what exactly you were texting when you suggested movie night with B but i know one thing, being straight up and honest is good but keep in mind contacted YOU in the first place because of a job. Make sure you help her with the job search but also convey the fact that you want more.
    Actually, it was girl A (the one I like) that was looking for a job. I occasionally let her know about a vacancy I hear about. I event suggested putting her in contact with my cousin who works for a big company. She might help her.

    About girl B, I think she freaked out when I suggested that she comes at my place. Should have taken things slower. Most of the girls around here don't immediately jump into sex. They sure take their time to appraise your worth. Sucks to live here...

    I have met some American girls. Game works so much better on them for some reason. Maybe because they are more open sexually.

    Quote Originally Posted by BigT View Post
    Also if when you dhv dont project the image that your a player. Thats not what girls or women want. In psychology women wants a leader, a guy that can support the family and someone that can protect them.
    Thanks for the advice, mate. I just tell her about the cool stuff I do and the cool people I meet (ie: went to the concert of a soprano friend and met all sorts of artists). I know she is a sucker for artsy stuff.

  8. #18
    BigT is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Well it wont matter then if B isn't the one you want. Take it as a lesson and remember never do exactly what we say on the forums as it most likely appeal only to the poster's age group and his/her location and the psychology of girls in that area. For example i am a high school student and i live in Alberta. The game here is completely different from what it would be in Mexico. Trust me i learned the hard way.
    I may be a starter but I like to help whatever ways I can

  9. #19
    pepito is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Another small update:

    Girl B contacted me out of the blue 2 weeks ago and apologized for not replying sooner. She said it was the end of the year and she had multiple work projects to finish and she had to travel abroad a lot because of them. She then said it would be hard to meet for a movie under these circumstances.
    I sent a short reply telling her I was busy as well and that I was going home in 3 years, so it would be better to meet some other time. Wished her a merry xmas and that was it. She never replied, so I guess she was too busy. Anyway, she doesn't seem too reliable in the sense she has a schedule of her own (always doing something, traveling somewhere, etc.) and it's hardly compatible with mine.

    Girl A: we keep texting like once per week. Last message of her was about her decorating the house with Christmas stuff and her brother making fun of her because it started looking like a circus. I thought of testing the waters, teased her and asked for a pic. She never got back, lol. The good news is that she told me she is coming back as of mid-January, so I might be able to game her properly. On the other hand, I have the impression this is going nowhere. There are times where I simply want to give up and move on. Apart from the fact that she still replies to my texts (which could be out of politeness, since I tried to help her with her job-hunting), I have yet to see any IOIs.

    Ok, we only met twice... I could also tell she was shy (avoiding eye contact at the beginning). I would really like to take things further but I don't know how to proceed or even it is too late now...

  10. #20
    BigT is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facing a dilemma - help please

    Quote Originally Posted by pepito View Post
    Girl B contacted me out of the blue 2 weeks ago and apologized for not replying sooner. She said it was the end of the year and she had multiple work projects to finish and she had to travel abroad a lot because of them. She then said it would be hard to meet for a movie under these circumstances.
    I sent a short reply telling her I was busy as well and that I was going home in 3 years, so it would be better to meet some other time.
    You didnt dhv by replying her here. Most AFCs would text that. Best thing you could have done was just not reply or say to bad next time then.
    I may be a starter but I like to help whatever ways I can


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