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  1. #1
    elizabeth412 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    I have been platonic friends with "J" for over two years. In a nutshell (which is probably not going to help the story here), there has been way more flirtation on his part, especially in recent months, but no date plans. I am helping him sell first row seats to a sporting event this season, as I did last spring. I got a sale for just one ticket about 10 days ago, and he called to congratulate me and advised he was going to pay me double the commission. I told him he didn't have to do that; he insisted. He got another call, mine
    ended and we didn't communicate for a few days -- odd, because he ALWAYS paid me either the day of or the day after a sale. I then ran into him a few days later, and he saw me, sat near me and smiled (so he didn't appear to be ignoring me), then got up moments later and I never saw him again that day.

    Friday afternoon I called him and both of our greetings were cool at best. I told him I was checking on that day's ticket sales and so forth and that I said I hadn't heard from him or his brother for a week. He then snapped and told me I was supposed to be calling him and said, "Call me, call me, call me! I got quiet, then he advised me to call his brother and that he wasn't blowing me off, but he had contractors with him at the time. When nothing came up about my
    commission, I matter-of-factly asked if he wanted to discuss it. He asked if I had a sale last week. Incredulous as to his "failure" to remember my only sale thus far this season, I said yes. He nonchalantly told me to call him back and let him know the amount and so forth. The conversation ended with an additional request to call his brother, which I did. Yesterday I called him and left a
    message asking how ticket sales were for the day before, and I reminded him of the particulars of my sale the previous week. I cheerily ended the message by telling him to enjoy the day.

    End of story. No response. All in all, I am not buying the "forgetfulness". Something else is at play here, but I don't know what. This is my smallest commission yet!!! The others were paid immediately! What is going on??? (No, it's not because he doesn't have the money.)

  2. #2
    TomInVegas's Avatar
    TomInVegas is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    It sounds like these guys are playing you for a fool. Get your money as soon as you can and forget about the romance part.
    Hit me up if you're thinking about coming to Vegas. It's the Best City for Game in the World.

  3. #3
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    Likes you.desires u, and may see the sale a favour a girl did and could be very excited about thus still not payin.may stick to him

  4. #4
    elizabeth412 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    I still have not heard anything from him, so now I am more than convinced that a very personal issue, unbeknownst to me, is in the mix. It doesn't make sense that this $100 commission (that he doubled from $50) is causing the rift, because this is the only time I have not received my commission on the day of or the day after the sale, including the highest one for $3,000. It's not about the money, and this failure on his part to communicate and/or return a call to address an already late commission payment seems chock-full of bitterness, doesn't it?

  5. #5
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    Probably feels relaxed in current state of relation thus avoiding escalation.Using that as croutch to see if anything might come up(the am going to see if its about that).everyone has their own coping strategy some people may never change

  6. #6
    elizabeth412 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    So now what?? Another day has gone by without contact. What is my plan of action now if I run into him -- do I look at him and then just walk away and maintain my dignity? If I approach him about the money, then I appear desperate and am really not comfortable doing that, even though I am entitled to it.

    Am I right in assuming that there is a personal issue of his against me in play here? As I said earlier, it's not because he doesn't have the money.

  7. #7
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    Theres nothing wrong with viewing this on a practical level sort of.even though whats outlined previously still pertains..u may go indie..etc

  8. #8
    elizabeth412 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    Update: I still had not yet heard from J as of earlier this morning. However, a potential buyer contacted me about Saturday's game and requested six tickets. I am waiting to hear back from him. In the meantime, I had to see whether six of our seven tickets are even available, being out of the loop for so long because of this apparent rift. So I got J's voicemail, to which I responded breezily by asking whether Santa Claus would be delivering my commission from two weeks ago and what the status is for Saturday's game. I encouraged him to leave a message if I didn't answer, as I would be hard to reach today. (He does not leave voicemails.) I did not let him know how many tickets I was requesting. That was an hour and a half ago. Quite honestly, this is someone who has usually responded to my calls almost immediately, so I am not expecting a return call, which further confirms to me that there is a personal issue out there, and I don't know what it is. Please help! What am I missing???

  9. #9
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Financial Twist in Would-be Romance...

    Sometimes in relations especially when things have been slightly delayed and the other party loves the other theres this fear of loosing which leads to resentment especially after high tense situations which leave them crushed hard and feeling loss and confused.
    This can make them hold on to a negative view just because they felt they were really special to other.some even focus hard core on being chased even expecting to be called as a way of validating thier acceptance from the one.
    The main source of unable to let go and show intent is the fear of feeling totally naked and exposed, thus emptyness.the Tension could leave them with a high level of resentment and an overall negative feel.etc.eithers may go with it.


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