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  1. #1
    Swish is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Relationship to Friendship

    So a little backstory. I met this girl over the summer in my hometown, we hit it off. We certainly rushed into it being exclusive (only about two weeks) because I had to go back to school, lesson learned. At the time we figured that a LDR would work because we were no more than a few hours away. However, she lost her job in my hometown and was forced to move back to her hometown, several states away. As I've gotten to know her I've discovered that I am the best thing in her life (and yes this can be a problem). She currently has no job, her family situation is a mess, and she doesn't really have much of a social circle and not much direction in life.

    We've talked about reuniting but I am also in a bit of a transition for myself as I'm graduating soon and have no certainty where I'm working. Also relocating is not a cheap venture plus entry level job etc.

    She is a nice girl and I really do want whats best for her. I understand that as a boyfriend I have to be "supportive", but currently I feel like I am "supporting" her which I'm really not in a position to do. I know that if I leave her completely it would kill her. It would have never crossed my mind but it seems like I would be spending a significant amount of money (for myself at least) to visit her and I don't know if I feel that money is worth it for something I'm not sure is going to work out any way. I know the goal is to leave women better off which leads me to my predicament.

    I don't want to leave this girl high and dry because I respect her enough that I don't want to build on what else she is going through, but I also just can't be the person who is "all that" especially since none of us are set in where we are going to be.

    My thinking was that perhaps I could establish the end of our relationship and the start of a friendship. Anyone else try something like this before? Thoughts?

    Sidenote: While I cant confirm it, I know alot of PUA's kind of advocate the "be the best thing that ever happened to her" philosophy but damn that can be dangerous

  2. #2
    DirtyOnPurpose's Avatar
    DirtyOnPurpose is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Relationship to Friendship

    You are going to friendzone her. This usually goes the other way around, it's what girls usually do when there's no sexual Tension whatsoever in the encounter.

    So in your case it's as easy as killing the sexual tension. She will grow to become your bestie, you need to talk to her about the exclusivity thing though.

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