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  1. #1
    wiz_kid is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default First date went OK - advice for improvement would be appreciated

    ***I'm still very new to dating and open to all criticisms and/or advice on next steps! Thanks in advance.

    Met an online HB9 tonight after texting for over a month; schedules didn't align + travel. I did talk to her on the phone twice briefly before the meet.

    Planned for dinner around her place and I arrived about 10 min late. Was going to do the hug + cheek kiss for greet, but she was sitting down in a bus stop and caught me off guard so we just hugged (Strike 1). Off to dinner, had some nice convo but no Kino bc her hands were generally in her lap. I placed my hands on the table hoping she would too, and she did later on, but I didn't go for her arm/wrist as planned and comment on jewelry (Strike 2). Lots of smiling and eye contact and we did have a shot before leaving. She offers to split the bill but I invited her so I paid. She says next time she'll pay.

    Next we went to dessert and shared one serving, different spoons. Chatted on bench then we walked some more and I finally kino - I comment on her earrings and touch them. She somewhat consistently throws me IOIs saying that I'm very interesting & unique and that I can navigate around her neighborhood and am very capable of showing her around. We walk some more. I should have taken her hand (Strike 3)! Guess I need to be more ballsy

    Stopped in a store and she picked up a small accessory. She takes my motorcyle jacket while in line to inspect it and says very stylish.

    Then we head towards my motorbike. She sits on it as I show her all the controls. I'm quite close to her and very lightly, briefly kino her shoulders. Also I kino when commenting on her nail paint. We say we'll go for a ride sometime but can't now bc we don't have the proper protective riding gear. She didn't want to risk alarming the police, even though I playfully suggested breaking the law.

    We walk back towards her place and she shows me a nice restaurant area right across the street. We check it out, chat some more, then finally walk to her door. I haven't effectively kino'd up to this point so I knew I couldn't go for lip k-close. So I hug and before releasing, I lightly go for a kiss anyways. We didn't make eye contact at this point but she resisted, so I calmly say...Only on the cheek. She says okay and I give her a peck. I say have a safe trip and she says...you too. I say I'm not going on a trip and look at her, but she doesn't make eye contact and fumbles with the door. Bye and I walk away.

    I thought going for the kiss couldn't be wrong !

    Entire outing was 3 hours and I texted her an hour later saying I had fun (also gave her a nickname). She texted me two hours later saying she also had fun, sorry end was awkward, just met and she's not like that... along those lines.

    +Positive
    +I was confident, playful, and lead for the most part
    +We established I am a man of value
    +Large kino improvements from my last encounter: earring, shoulder while on bike, fingertips/fingernails
    +Cheek k-close? I don't want to be friend-zoned...

    -Negative
    -I didn't kino efficiently and effectively
    -Smiled a lot but didn't laugh that much (may be differences in humor)
    -Didn't qualify or compliment her - 75% of the time she was asking about me

  2. #2
    LordAlp is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: First date went OK - advice for improvement would be appreciated

    First of all, it's good that she asked about you!! It means that she is interested you, she likes you. However you could've Kino more, next time when you go to a restaurant sit closer to her, I know the feeling when she is on the opposite ending and you can't kino 100%. However, you can always find excuses! For example, ask for her hand, tell her how little hands she have, how soft they are... play with her hand, bla blaa. Or if you think you can manage, read her palm, pretend you are reading, and say some random stuff like, you are going to have 3 husbands, 1 love... she is going to be happy, etc etc. She will laugh at the 3 husband thing. Then you can get an excuse like telling a secret, whispering it in her ear... when you are there, you just say: there is no secret, i just wanted to do this . So the jewelry thing you did was cool, good job!! I am glad that you improved. Try to make the conversation about her, it's good that she is asking about you but you have to focus on her, qualify her, does she know how to cook, or to iron your shirts and so on. If she says she doesn't then playfully tell her, that you don't know if you would get along, but you have to smile at this point and hold eye contact. Don't over qualify her, thats not good either, only 2-3 times maximum. With her, throwing those ioi's, I believe 1 of this qualification would've be enough.

    Once I dated a girl for 3 times, and I didn't feel like touching her, like it wasn't the time yet. I did kino, but very little, so even if it seems wrong, go for it. It didn't work out to well with her, because I wasn't to touchy, so you don't have nothing to loose. As long as she doesn't tell you stop it is OK! If she say's so, ask her 'It's to soon, right?(smile), maybe after 5 minutes then' . When you wanted to kiss her, you could've kissed her, ignore that she pulled her head back, she only wanted to see how confident are you about that move, and that's why was so awkward at the end, because she wanted more, and like a little girl she got a little upset maybe ). However it's good that she apologized trough text message. Arrange a meeting, try something simpler, a coffe or something more fun, billiard is a good thing, you don't have to be good, maybe she'll say that she can't play, tell her you can't as well, but it will be fun. You can kino there.

    It's going to be a while to kino without hesitation, the same is with me, so don't worry my friend , you're on the right track. Message me if you got any other questions, I would be happy to answer them as soon as possible.


    Good luck!

  3. #3
    wiz_kid is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: First date went OK - advice for improvement would be appreciated

    Thanks man!

    I'm wondering...does calling come off as more needy than texting? I'm not much of a texter so I would rather call.

  4. #4
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    Banners90 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: First date went OK - advice for improvement would be appreciated

    Seems pretty decent date to be fair. Only thing I wouldn't have done is offer to pay. I never pay until I'm full on dating the chick.

    I think calling would be a lot more personal. The good thing about it in comparison to texts is you can over text girls. Example, at times in order to keep the text exchange going you can tend to text for the sake of doing so. I know I do at times. So yes call but I wouldn't text too much as well.
    PER ARDUA AD ALTA


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