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  1. #1
    Oramac is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Deciphering her intent......

    Ok, a little backstory first: I was dating this girl for a month or so when we had a falling out. Didn't talk to her for probably another month or so, and was actually really mad at her. I'd wanted a relationship.

    Anyway, we started talking via text again on and off. Let me write out what was said so you get the full picture:

    ME: Mornin [name of girl]

    HER: Morning

    ME: So I had a thought this morning. It seems we both feel like we messed up and the other did nothing wrong. And we clearly care about each other. So lets just leave the past in the past. It is a new year, after all.

    (5+ hours later)
    HER: I think we could try going on a date and see how it goes.

    ME: I like that idea.

    ME: If I remember your schedule right, either tonight or Wednesday is best? Something simple I think.

    HER: Prob can't tonight. Wednesday might work though.

    ME: Sounds good. Do you work Wednesday?

    HER: No.

    ME: Hmm. Neither do I. Lets do lunch then. Nice and simple.

    HER: IDK about lunch. I'm going out nye.

    Ahh. Need time to rest. Ok, something later then.

    (again several hours later)
    HER: Yeah we can go out to dinner or something. I just don't want you to get your hopes up. I still don't know what I want. It's just like I am lonely but I don't want a bf right now.

    ME: That's fine. We can play it by ear.

    So from this, I come to 3 possible conclusions:

    1) she does want a bf, but doesn't want to admit it. Possibly even to herself.

    2) She's lonely and wants a fuckbuddy. (She even agreed the sex was fantastic!)

    3) She just wants a friend.

    Now I'm ok with options 1 and 2. But not #3. Just not sure how to really tell.


  2. #2
    marvilo's Avatar
    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Deciphering her intent......

    Honestly you're puting yourself in a position where you got no power. She's basically calling all the shots in my opinion. If she doesn't want a relationship and you do then you should leave it and move on because when we try to get things our way that we can't have, we start make the other person a god in our eyes and kinda kiss up to them just so they can say Yes. I feel like you still win but you got to be the bigger person, just let her talk to you and don't really try to go out in dates. If she takes something away from her then you do the same. ( don't take her out on a date. Tell her you just want to be friends, reverse psychology)
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

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